2027 Coli Convention

[Admiral Ackbar]

Let's assemble a planning committee. Host it in a big city with a convention center, say Las Vegas or LA or Seattle or some shyt for three days. $300 registration fee to cover the hotel and door prizes.

Day 1
8-9 am Registration

9:30 am - Keynote address by @DrexlersFade : The Buttaface, Manhood, and Internet Cred in an Internet Framework

10:00 am - Team Building Exercise led by former NCAA coach Mike Gundy

10:30 am - cocaine break. See butlers with white gloves.

11:00 am - Panel: Building a Backup Hip Hop Forum Community in a World Dominated by Social Media, by 60 different motherfukkers from TLR

12:00 pm - Lunch in main ballroom

1:00 pm: Plenary Sessions in breakout rooms on conference level 2: The Hunt for BrooklynzSon; Housing Solutions and Finance for Passport Bros and Sisters; Is an LLC for Me?; Identifying CACs on the Internet; What 15,000 Guests Mean for The Coli

2:00 pm - Self Care Sessions - Breakout rooms on Mezzanine Level: Couples Counseling for GMB, Therapy for #HOH, Quarters (wall near the lobby)

3:00 PM - Getting Your Ass Ate for Money: Career Advice by The Nigerian

4:00 PM: Networking Activity: Guess the attendee's screen name(s)

5:00 PM: Dinner by that poster who's always throwing it down in the kitchen @Jcotton1

7:00 PM: Concert by DeBarge and Kresyshaw

9:00 pm: Club Coli, brought to you by JBO




Imagine if we could pull it off.

Someone make.a schedule for day 2.

 

[DrexlersFade]

This nikka Buttaface

 

[Admiral Ackbar]

This nikka Buttaface

I'd smash 100% of the ones you post tho

 

[King_Kamala61]

We can have Toke & Paint Event too OP I wanna teach that one....

Itz Gonna Be So Nasty

BIG BLACK VEINY BLACK AREOLAS

 

[CopiousX]

We can have Toke & Paint Event too OP I wanna teach that one....

Itz Gonna Be So Nasty

BIG BLACK VEINY BLACK AREOLAS

Actually I'm in favor of skipping the convention center just going to the strip club .

 

[Prince.Skeletor]

8:00 AM - 9:00 AM "The Walk of Shame" Continental Breakfast
A curated selection of stale pastries, watered-down orange juice, and the sound of silence. Coffee is mandatory.

9:00 AM - 9:30 AM: Keynote: The 48 Laws of Internet Power
Speaker: @Savvir - A deep dive into never explaining yourself, the power of selective quoting, and why your first few posts in a thread determine your future.

9:30 AM - 10:30 AM: Advanced Trolling and The Art of the Quote
A practical workshop on maximizing your post count, how to spot and bait a hater, and crafting a quote-train so long it breaks the page.

10:30 AM - 11:30 AM: "The Unban Request" Panel: Accountability and the Mods @The Admin Team
Host a live, unscripted session where selected banned users can plead their case. Expect heartfelt apologies, furious denials, and the occasional thrown chair. Security will be present.

11:30 AM - 12:30 PM: The Digital Footprint & Real-World Consequences
An HR professional and a former private investigator discuss the dangers of debating in HL vs TLR.

12:30 PM - 1:30 PM: Luxury Lunch
A Vegas-style buffet. Mandatory five-star review of the food in a closed-door session before being allowed to leave the dining hall.

1:30 PM - 2:30 PM: Breakout Sessions: Level 3
A. Is Illmatic still the best album? (No new arguments allowed.) B. Relationship Alley: How to really get past a seven-page thread discussing your significant other’s questionable habits. C. Squirting is not pee, and it never was.

2:30 PM - 3:30 PM: Interactive Debate: The Great Coli Schism
Why people who chose diner with Jay-Z are idiots and will never succeed in life and have a higher likelyhood of Erectile Dysfunction.

3:30 PM - 4:00 PM: Networking: The Real-Life Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down
Attendees form two lines. You get 3 seconds with each person. Give them an enthusiastic thumbs up (like/rep) or a visible, non-verbal thumbs down (dislike/fade). No speaking.

4:00 PM - 5:00 PM: Closing Keynote: "We’re All Just Lurkers, Eventually
A sentimental look back at the glory days, a call for a return to civility (which will fail), and a final, passionate discussion of what is ahead for thecoli.com

5:00 PM: Adjournment
Attendees are free to go... or immediately convene a smaller, more exclusive meet-up at the nearest lounge to discuss which screen names showed up and how much older everyone looked in real life then they thought they would.

 

[NoMoreWhiteWoman2020]

Definitely need an open bar and buffet.

 

[Yinny]

Where the white women?

Day 2 Part 1 could be All-Beef Day, from the movements to the personals, ban bets resolved and lingering fades and neg wars

Part 2 (those uninvolved in Coli beefs)

An intensive half day workshop to recognize forum scams aka “stop giving internet strangers money just cause they begging”

Lunch

Relevant tranny updates, **** and co tricks and trends

Cap/stunter’s ball where all the Coli comes together in their Black tie attire to crown the elite of the elites at being full of shyt, and alternately, doing it big

Day 3, deep dive into Pawgnificence, see question above, critically absent any mentions of the key component for Colicans to register and attend

 

[Prince.Skeletor]

Guaranteed the Coli Convention will happen before GTA 6 comes out

 

[Admiral Ackbar]

Definitely need an open bar and buffet.

Dudes gonna be knocked out in more ways than one.

 

[Savvir]

.

Still mad because @YaThreadFloppedB!

 

[GreenGhxst]

Can we have a JBO keynote

 

[Trips]

are people getting in with these shoes?

 

[richaveli83]

3:00 PM - Getting Your Ass Ate for Money: Career Advice by The Nigerian

 

[trap101-ETHout-Allegri-In]

10:30 AM - 11:30 AM: "The Unban Request" Panel: Accountability and the Mods @The Admin Team
Host a live, unscripted session where selected banned users can plead their case. Expect heartfelt apologies, furious denials, and the occasional thrown chair. Security will be present.

Wrongfully Banned From The Coli? Come Tell Your Story!

It's been a long, long time boys. 7 years, to be exact. This was my final post, Dec 22, 2018 So why was I banned? This..... Was I wrong? Certainly. But there had been far, FAR worse things said than that- and that still continue being said til this day and nothing happens to those...

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