He wants to really turn his life around back to his natural way.........
http://www.nairaland.com/2223235/gay-depressed
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother...
http://www.nairaland.com/2223235/gay-depressed
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother...
'disapprove it' huh? 
