Any tips on how to deal with a lazy woman?

[Ronnie Lott]

U only have 2 options:

1. Keep puttin up with her lazy azz and accept her as she is

2. Drop her, move on and find a new chick that aint lazy

 

[threattonature]

Cook with her. If you can read, you can cook. It doesnt have to be an elaborate meal, but yall should look on recipe sites or something and cook together. Just follow the directions and you will be good.

As far as all that other sh-t, you say shes sensitive and gets defensive well try a different approach. She needs to grow up.

This here is the truth. My girl that I was living with never really had to cook in her life. She looked up some recipes and taught herself to cook and within about a month was making huge meals.

You have to be a man about it and put your foot down. Let her know she got to get her shyt together or the marriage is over. If she still doesn't attempt to change that shows how little she values you or your marriage.

 

[True Blue Moon]

Naw breh, dude picked up a lazy ass broad. He said he didn't even ask whether she could cook before they got married. I know this is the coli and a lot of y'all nikkas think women are out to get you for your call center check, but the signs are there if you look for them. When I'm around my GF's parent everything she does is what her moms does. When I'm around her family for BBQ's and what not everything she does is what her aunts and cousins do the same thing. Some women were just raised properly.

Nah, it has nothin to do with a chick being out to get your, I'm just saying that getting comfortable is a motherfukker. You right, if she didn't know how to cook then that's something he shouldn't have let slide. But in terms of getting too comfortable, it wasn't cooking it could be something else if he doesn't put his foot down. Putting on weight, sexless marriage, not trying to look good anymore etc. You gotta be more proactive about shyt like that when you're married even if she was the total package in the beginning.

 

[True Blue Moon]

Ill go at this swift and hard...

Ill let yall know the results, maybe even secret record the whole scenario

Record it breh. That way we can break it down like game film.

 

[PiffPowerPleasure]

Do you need a nikka to spell it out for you? First off, don't begin with that "we need to talk bullshyt." you give the person ample time to concoct a defense. Just come in from work one day and just start speaking what's real. Put some bass in your voice. Just cuz the bytch is fine don't mean she gets over, don't let her give u them puppy dog eyes. Hit her with the "babe for real...I'm tired of living like this" with the forlorn look. When she tries to ask what's wrong, cut that bytch off real sharp "LET ME FINISH! That's one of the problems, I feel like you don't HEAR me." if she's a good woman, she'll shut the fukk up. Then lay her ass out flat, I can only brief u cuz Idk all the details but it should flow like this " I love you but this situation is not working for me, I'm working hard to provide a solid home for us but I feel like you fighting against me and I let shyt slide for too long. TONIGHT we're gonna clean this house together, and I'm expecting from here on out every day that you're unemployed you'll be keeping up the house. Once you get a job, we'll figure out a schedule or maid services but I expect that as a PARTNER in this marriage you gotta contribute on the daily." then pull out some print out of some simple recipes, let her start off with some pastas or something. Then tell her, "these are some cool recipes I think we can work on learning to cook. I'm tired of eating out every day, the shyt is costing us money we don't have, and it'll be fun () for us to do. This processed food every day is has got to stop." etc and so on for any other problems u have with her.

The keys are this:

1) keep your voice confident and even, if she sees weakness she will exploit it. Don't let her interrupt you. Don't raise your voice or show emotion, don't give her any ways to argue with you or escape tue convo by saying she feels attacked. See how she responds.
2) for every problem, offer a solution. This will nullify any "but I don't know howwwww or where to start" that women like to throw out. This also gives u a way to measure progress. Also if u need to divorce her, you can keep those things as evidence for you trying to make it work and her being uncooperative.
3) dont just say "you need to do" include yourself in on those things I mentioned. You would benefit from learning to cook and keep your own house in the long run. U never know what the future holds.

Keep ur head up breh

 

[WhiteDawg3000]

subs

 

[jwall123]

Yeah, of course, but she mad sensitive..like all women but times that by 20.
She gets defensive and starts talking about what I be doing wrong.

Take into account your flaws. By understanding that you can take away her ammo. Fix yourself- Make it noticeable- Then Confront her.

For example... if she says you arent home enough. Make an effort to be home a little more and spend some time with her... That way she notices that you are home more.

Then calmly talk to her. Yelling will breed hostility. REMEMBER you want her to respond. DO what is necessary to get the reaction that you want.

 

[Rocket Scientist]

Once a lazy person always a lazy person.

 

[unit321]

Some actual tactics would be nice, not just the "throw her out" regimen y'all kick around. I'm married so I need other options, she don't clean, she gets a job for like 2 months and then quits cause she always looking for the right "one". She has talents but is too lazy to even use that....She wont cook like at all...well she tried and it was terrible so im cool with that, but at least learn to try. My pops said I should cut the cable off?

Maybe some lazy females on here can share their though process as to why they don't want to do anything at all for themselves? Or some fellas who have cured the lazy female?

Thank You.

Well, it's too late to ask "What are your goals in life?" and "What tasks do you want to share while married? What tasks do you want to do? What tasks do you want me to do?" Then, you could have bailed out.

So now, you need to have a talk. It might be interrogative, but you need to get real answers. "What kind of job are you looking for?" "Where do you see yourself career-wise in five years?" "How do you expect to get to that goal?" Basically, you need to unearth the truth. Is she motivated to grow her career or is she just looking for a fun job but if it isn't there, she is okay with sitting at home and riding your gravy train while watching soap ops on TV.

You are the man. You need to get answers, bare minimum. You can't change people. They have to be self-motivated. Sucks but that's the truth.

 

[winb83]

Well, it's too late to ask "What are your goals in life?" and "What tasks do you want to share while married? What tasks do you want to do? What tasks do you want me to do?" Then, you could have bailed out.

So now, you need to have a talk. It might be interrogative, but you need to get real answers. "What kind of job are you looking for?" "Where do you see yourself career-wise in five years?" "How do you expect to get to that goal?" Basically, you need to unearth the truth. Is she motivated to grow her career or is she just looking for a fun job but if it isn't there, she is okay with sitting at home and riding your gravy train while watching soap ops on TV.

You are the man. You need to get answers, bare minimum. You can't change people. They have to be self-motivated. Sucks but that's the truth.

Have a talk? for what? you think a lazy person doesn't have the self awareness to know they're lazy? its intentional. you calling them out for being who they are is pointless.

the thread starter is just in denial. what type of question is he even asking? nobody really needs tips to deal with anyone. a person is who they are you either can accept them for that or reject them for it.

the only real change that's easy for a human to deal with is unconscious evolution style change. conscious change is difficult its nearly impossible for you to try and get someone else to change for your benefit. it difficult enough for them to decide to change for their own benefit them doing it for your benefit is really a long shot.

 

[unit321]

Have a talk? for what? you think a lazy person doesn't have the self awareness to know they're lazy? its intentional. you calling them out for being who they are is pointless.

the thread starter is just in denial. what type of question is he even asking? nobody really needs tips to deal with anyone. a person is who they are you either can accept them for that or reject them for it.

the only real change that's easy for a human to deal with is unconscious evolution style change. conscious change is difficult its nearly impossible for you to try and get someone else to change for your benefit. it difficult enough for them to decide to change for their own benefit them doing it for your benefit is really a long shot.

The talk is so that the woman is aware that the man is aware of what she is, what she is doing, etc. She might be 'playing' stupid. What 'talking it out' does it "keep it real". Tell her to stop frontin'. What is she fronting? The fact that she's lazy. It's tough to get up in someone's grill. I've gotten in major arguments. Seriously, if you don't have a talk about it, she's going to maintain her facade; that's what he doesn't want.

Yeah, I agree with you. Conscious change is difficult.

 

[Huellz Santana]

Once a lazy person always a lazy person.

basically​