Can someone explain self-pity? How do you know if you're on the pity pot?

[Hope]

Self-Pity: Pity for oneself, especially a self-indulgent attitude concerning one's own difficulties, hardships, etc.
That's from dictionary.com.

I read is a terrible condition will robs us of all positive energy to the point where we can barely function properly. My Pastor tells me all the time I have no appreciation for anything about my life, when I live a good life. He says my perception creates that, many people tell me I worry or think too much.

I'm in a very dark place and spent the whole day planning to commit three crimes with can land me in jail. I'm feeling vindictive, angry, and misunderstood. People will pay. I'm trying to see how much I can get away with to intimidate and harm them, but I don't want to go to jail.

But my father told me I'm just on the pity pot. But i'm saying, I have issues and they hurt. lol

 

[Princess Coco]

I have issues too lol. I've been having my own pity party for the last couple of weeks. Try to move on and forget about the things that's causing you to feel bad. Hurting those people will not make you feel any better. Focus on improving yourself and being happy .

 

[FSP]

I feel you 100%. I have been dealing with this for 7 years

The way i see it, if it gets to the point where the effort to change it feels useless, then its a problem

Because its totally normal to feel down and out like a failure every so often

It becomes an issue when it destroys your will to want to do anything about it

And not a small issue either, its a HUGE issue. You can literally spend years of your life in that hole. I know because ive done it. Im almost 25 and im just starting to feel like what I should have felt like when i was around 18-19 years old. The energy, the motivation passion for life that i have now is what i should have had in my late teens going into college, but because of various failures i got stuck in that dark place for a long time..i can literally sense where i should be vs where i am now because of it

 

[End Cruelty]

just smoke a little weed.

 

[Beedad]

just smoke a little weed.

Good advice but that makes it worse.

 

[MWinn]

If you have health insurance, go see a therapist. Make sure the therapist is about self improvement, not one of those who just sit there and judge. Also try to find one of your culture, thats important.

 

[Afro]

I feel you 100%. I have been dealing with this for 7 years

The way i see it, if it gets to the point where the effort to change it feels useless, then its a problem

Because its totally normal to feel down and out like a failure every so often

It becomes an issue when it destroys your will to want to do anything about it

And not a small issue either, its a HUGE issue. You can literally spend years of your life in that hole. I know because ive done it. Im almost 25 and im just starting to feel like what I should have felt like when i was around 18-19 years old. The energy, the motivation passion for life that i have now is what i should have had in my late teens going into college, but because of various failures i got stuck in that dark place for a long time..i can literally sense where i should be vs where i am now because of it

Good to know I'm not alone

We're gonna make it

 

[CinnaSlim]

Stop externalizing your power.

Accept the things you cannot change:
You can not control how others act. only how you react.

Change the things you can:
You are capable of doing more than complaining. If you don't like something, change it.

Have the wisdom to know the difference.

 

[Princess Coco]

Externalizing your power.

Accept the things you cannot change:
You can not control how others act. only how you react.

Change the things you can:
You are capable of doing more than complaining. If you don't like something, change it.

Have the wisdom to know the difference.

Do whatever she says

 

[Saiyajin]

if you aint part of #NarcissistGang

chances are you're a self pitying fakkit

 

[Chef]

Stop externalizing your power.

Accept the things you cannot change:
You can not control how others act. only how you react.

Change the things you can:
You are capable of doing more than complaining. If you don't like something, change it.

Have the wisdom to know the difference.

I needed to see this. Sometimes I pull myself out the hole only to fall in again deeper.

 

[Hope]

just smoke a little weed.

In recovery. Can't. Had the desire to do dope/coke past two weeks, but feelings passed. Feel much better today and after a month of aggression, sadness, and being stuck. I feel hopeful and joyous now.

If you have health insurance, go see a therapist. Make sure the therapist is about self improvement, not one of those who just sit there and judge. Also try to find one of your culture, thats important.

i posted this in the thread about Blacks not being present in MH field. Just started with this Eastern European old small ass lady. Didn't' appreciate the intake or first session. But I will set some boundaries with her. But like this poster said ...

Stop externalizing your power.

Accept the things you cannot change:
You can not control how others act. only how you react.

Change the things you can:
You are capable of doing more than complaining. If you don't like something, change it.

Have the wisdom to know the difference.

Just taking what I need and leaving the rest. I'm responsible for my life, it's only suggested guidelines from therapist, sponsors, and support members.

I've been blaming everybody and everything, and making excuses. When I just saw myself going downhill, i said i couldn't do it anymore. I'm not naturally angry or vindictive, but i hold onto it b/c in my head it "still works and protects me".

 

[MWinn]

Keep looking, someone like her will ruin the experience and you won't get much out of it. Find someone who can understand and/or relate to you.