Cheesecake is still delicious.
The real outrage should be directed toward carrot cake and fruit cake.
Fruit cake seemed like a good idea. People like fruit. People like cake. It made sense to combine them. What resulted is a goddamned abomination that should have been buried under the deepest passages below the Egyptian pyramids never to be seen or heard from again. It is a horrible, horrible creation. It's the food equivalent of putting pebbles of gravel inside a sponge. Who asked for this? Nevermind. Burn him.
Carrot cake is fairly straightforward. Carrot cake is terrible. You know what a person thinks when they eat carrot cake? This would taste so much better if it didn't have carrots. A part of me thinks that carrot cake was the 1st ever cake, and that once people tasted how awful it was, they tried to cover it up with frosting. That was the invention of frosting. Then someone had the even better idea to just remove the carrots entirely and make a regular cake and add frosting. That person is a hero. In fact, if Islam was real and true (it isn't), that person would be in heaven now with 70 virgins.