dezert_storm
All Star
"I've had my fun, it's time for me to settle down"
That's what she said that broke me instantly. This came after a group discussion with her friends that had to do with hookups. I asked her to clarify what she meant by that later, and she said that she's glad she had her fun sex with hookups, and that she's glad she can settle down with someone more secure and available.
I told her that I basically find that extraordinarily offensive, and right then and there basically ensured that there would, for the rest of our relationship, forever be an imbalance. I rejected all hookups as I wanted sex to be only for those I loved, whereas she had a bunch of hookups, loved all of it, and then settled for me, who she basically implied was a downgrade.
She thinks it's absolutely insane that I'd leave her over this, but I personally can't fathom staying. I mean to put it quite bluntly, I felt like the biggest bytch after she said that in front of her friends. I think the relationship and the one you want to spend of your life with should be the fun part.
Why would I want to stay in what has basically become an entirely one-sided relationship where she's reminiscing on the fun she's had, while I'm actively trying to make those great memories with her? I'm sorry but fukk that. Why should I be happy knowing that other guys got the super fun, wild times with her after knowing her for a couple hours, whereas I, the guy who is giving her my absolute 100%, gets the mediocre, tired version. How am I supposed to feel like I'm not putting in 10x the effort as these other guys yet receiving 1/10 in return?
Like I'm sorry but I simply find that way of thinking simply incompatible with a long-term relationship, especially as someone who has never and will never give myself sexually to someone casually. I just feel like there would always be a major imbalance.
I mean what's done is done already, but I'd love to know if this is an overreaction or not
Edit- It's not just about the sex, it's about how she views it. She's had her fun, now she wants to settle down with me. I don't agree with that, I think the relationship is the fun part. I think getting in a relationship is when the fun should start ramping up and get more exciting, she obviously thinks the exact opposite
That's what she said that broke me instantly. This came after a group discussion with her friends that had to do with hookups. I asked her to clarify what she meant by that later, and she said that she's glad she had her fun sex with hookups, and that she's glad she can settle down with someone more secure and available.
I told her that I basically find that extraordinarily offensive, and right then and there basically ensured that there would, for the rest of our relationship, forever be an imbalance. I rejected all hookups as I wanted sex to be only for those I loved, whereas she had a bunch of hookups, loved all of it, and then settled for me, who she basically implied was a downgrade.
She thinks it's absolutely insane that I'd leave her over this, but I personally can't fathom staying. I mean to put it quite bluntly, I felt like the biggest bytch after she said that in front of her friends. I think the relationship and the one you want to spend of your life with should be the fun part.
Why would I want to stay in what has basically become an entirely one-sided relationship where she's reminiscing on the fun she's had, while I'm actively trying to make those great memories with her? I'm sorry but fukk that. Why should I be happy knowing that other guys got the super fun, wild times with her after knowing her for a couple hours, whereas I, the guy who is giving her my absolute 100%, gets the mediocre, tired version. How am I supposed to feel like I'm not putting in 10x the effort as these other guys yet receiving 1/10 in return?
Like I'm sorry but I simply find that way of thinking simply incompatible with a long-term relationship, especially as someone who has never and will never give myself sexually to someone casually. I just feel like there would always be a major imbalance.
I mean what's done is done already, but I'd love to know if this is an overreaction or not
Edit- It's not just about the sex, it's about how she views it. She's had her fun, now she wants to settle down with me. I don't agree with that, I think the relationship is the fun part. I think getting in a relationship is when the fun should start ramping up and get more exciting, she obviously thinks the exact opposite
