nope. for at least 5 years i thought my death was near. i think about death all the time. allllll the time. first it was me dieing in my sleep. then it was me getting some terminal disease (for a short while). then being murdered (for a short while), and now its some accident where im hit by a drunk driver. lmfao, i know im weird. i told a friend of mine i would be pissed if i got my degree and then i died soon after, and she called me stupid. but if i ended up dieing, jokes on her! lmao
i also cant picture myself being grown and with a family. i have to force those ideas of my future. the most genuine thoughts of my future dont go past me working and living in an apartment by myself. i think about my past a lot.
im ready to die, im not too fond of this world/society. but i wont kill myself. cuz just cuz im ready to die doesnt mean its my time to die. plus suicide is kind of selfish
so if i die anytime soon, you heard it here first!
