Word on the coli streets is that the campus community at Bringham Young University (BYU) may be dealing with a unique situation related to pediculosis pubis, aka “crabs.”
A Twitter user recently alleged that BYU — a private institution that’s sponsored by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (aka the Mormon Church) — is specifically dealing with an issue related to “armpit crabs.”
For context, “crabs” is most often associated with an infestation of lice in one’s public hair that occurred during sex; however, according to Altmeyers Encyclopedia, the blood-sucking lice can also afflict other areas through close contact, including “hair in the chest and abdominal region.”
“There was an outbreak of armpit crabs at BYU. Sit with me for a moment, and think about how that happened. Have a good day y’all,” the user who spearheaded the conversation coyly tweeted over the weekend.
A Rumor About a Crabs Outbreak at Brigham Young University Sparks Talk of Armpit Sex
Some TikTok users are claiming that a Mormon workaround for sex is causing uncomfortable results for college kids.
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Armpit sex isn’t the only intercourse-workaround rumor that’s made the rounds online. Perhaps most famously, there’s soaking, sometimes also called docking or floating, where one person puts their penis inside their partner but doesn’t move. The idea has cropped up online every now and then for over a decade. One Utah-based sex therapist demonstrated the concept in a viral 2019 Barstool Sports video, using a teabag and a cup of hot water. “We put it into the vagina, and then you just don’t move. There’s no thrusting, you just kind of enjoy the warmth,” he said. “Let the tea bag steep.” Typically, it’s talked about as something people supposedly do, lending it an air of urban legend, but in 2017 Mel Magazine interviewed a person who claimed to have done it: “I was inside of her; it felt good; and sometimes we would kinda grind involuntarily,” he said. An apparent add-on to soaking, known as jump-humping, has also circulated online in recent years. This allegedly involves getting a willing pal to jump on the bed while you’re docked, creating some movement without you doing it yourself.
The most recent story sprang up over the weekend from a Twitter account with 10,000 followers belonging to a fitness coach in Texas. The account happens to be named Gumbo Crab. Suspicious? Maybe! “There was an outbreak of armpit crabs at BYU,” the user said. “Sit with me for a moment, and think about how that happened.” The tweet has been liked more than 87,000 times. It quickly began popping up on TikTok, where people made reaction videos to the Tweet, some entreating the Mormons to “Just have sex!”
Jordan and McKay, who prefer to go by their first names to maintain their privacy, married in the Mormon church before leaving together in early 2021, put off by what they saw as contradictory values and unhealthy teachings. Now, they run a YouTube channel where they educate viewers about the inner workings of Mormonism. They found the idea of armpit fukking “outlandish,” but not impossible, given the rigidity of their upbringing. “Mormon scriptures say that any type of sexual sin, whether that be masturbation or sex in general, is next to murder,” Jordan says.
Strategies for getting around the rules are common, the couple say. McKay tells Rolling Stone he heard about “soaking” from a friend growing up. “The idea of soaking is that it’s not sex because you just insert your penis into an orifice, and then you just park it there, and whatever happens happens,” he says. “[My friend] explained it to me and I was like, ‘Oh my God this is wild.’” He didn’t really believe anyone did it, though, until after he left the church. “Up until last year, I was like, that’s just a fable. Nobody does that. And then a fellow TikToker that we met admitted that they had gone into a sexual situation with that intention, but it didn’t end up that way.” Jordan and McKay devoted a video on their YouTube channel to talking about soaking.
Although McKay and Jordan don’t know anyone who’s had armpit sex, the “outercourse” practices to skirt the rules are definitely real, they say, bourne out of Mormonism’s strict culture of purity and the times when it clashes with normal sexual development. “I think it’s just a way that people can be like, I am absolutely out of my mind horny right now, and I just need some way to allow myself to not feel bad about what I’m about to do,” McKay says. “It’s all based on the stupid shyt that the Mormon church forces upon kids. There wouldn’t have to be these stupid workarounds, if they taught a healthy discourse and made space for healthy conversations around sex.”
Dr. Milstein says it’s important for health care professionals to think about why people might resort to acts like soaking or armpit sex, to potentially help them deal with what they’re going through, including guilt surrounding sex and sexuality. “Given what I know about Mormonism and the idea of preserving virginity, it doesn’t surprise me that folks are looking for ways to have a sexual release that still fits within the letter of the law, if not the spirit of the law,” she says. “They’re human beings. They still want to feel relief, they still want to feel pleasure, they still want to feel intimacy. I mean, those are basic human drives.”
Armpit Hair Is Back, Whether You Like It or Not
https://www.wsj.com/articles/armpit-hair-back-emma-corrin-vogue-11657925530 Julia Roberts caused a splash when she showed up at the 1999 premiere of ‘Notting Hill’ with unshaved armpits. TONY KYRIACOU/SHUTTERSTOCK Even trendy razor companies are backing off from the clean shave. How armpit...
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