Having Broke Friends Unappreciation

[I Really Mean It]

Before I give my short lament, let me say that I have absolutely nothing against any of my friends for their respective financial situations. Mine isn't perfect by any stretch, though I've managed to exert some discipline and save enough to have a decent cushion that's extended my disposable income somewhat. It's hard out here, especially for black men, so I'll never look down upon any of them for having shallow pockets.

However, understanding their situation doesn't make me gullible and susceptible to being used. To start the New Year, I've decided to swear off my usual routine of spending weekend evenings spending a c-note at a local watering hole. One reason is to stack money and cut down on expenses that aren't a necessity (though, I do enjoy some Henny and quality beer while hibernating, I'll admit ), which bar hopping certainly doesn't meet the definition. The other purpose of remaining inside is to avoid friends whose lack of funds has become beyond bothersome.

Hanging with them is something I enjoy, especially in this climate where the ranks of your allies grow thin as you grow to realize how many black people are c00ns. My nights with them are filled conversation that I"ve found healthy, which broadens my mind and helps me deal with the anxiety of being black in this prison of a country. Yet, when almost all of them are always coming to the bar with enough for a drink and finding themselves looking to me to cover the remaining drinks, associating with them becomes problematic.

I don't want to cut them off, nor am opposed to continuing my role as the designated buyer of rounds when their funds are low. But, I'm cutting them off for a couple months as I push into 2019, thinking it's time to teach them a lesson.

 

[Bgreat]

You gotta cut them off. They are liabilities not assests.. fukk all that childhood friends talk. People grow apart

 

[I Really Mean It]

You gotta cut them off. They are liabilities not assests.. fukk all that childhood friends talk. People grow apart

They're not even childhood friends, people I've since drifted from. These are cats I used to work with at a previous job. I feel you, though. In a way, I've kind of cut them off, since I don't return their calls or texts and have even blocked a couple of them because of how persistent they were in trying to coax me out of the crib.

 

[Weaver31]

Back in the day like 7 yrs ago I was coming in and turned TV on. Wendy Williams was on BET and I don't watch that shy5 but one chick in her audience at that time asked her about her broke friends and how can she deal with them wanting to do shyt that cost money. Wendy told her to deal with broke friends by only doing shyt with them that don't cost anything like taking a walk. I did take that away from what she said and she was right.

U can keep ur broke friends OP but only do shyt with them that won't hurt or even affect ur pockets. No going out to eat, clubbing, shopping, traveling, smoking or getting drunk or high with them. When they ask for u to cough up bucks....suggest something that doesn't cost money. If they ain't wit it....then fuk them and don't get up with them. Ain't nobody got time for a one sided relationship/friendship.

 

[Killer Instinct]

Those aren't friends big dog, those are associates. Friends dont mooch because they respect your time & money as much as theirs. More importantly, they're men with no pride. My boy is tighter with me than my actual brother. Hell, I'm his sons godfather and call his mom my mother and I still have to borderline force him to take financial assistance from me. He certainly doesn't have his hand out and as a man, seeks to provide for himself and his own family within reason. Sounds like your squad is complacent and composed primarily of leeches searching for a secondary childhood. You aren't their father.


If they consistently want to go out but consistently dont have the funds to do so, then let them know that you aren't consistently footing any bill. You need your money, too. Life is humbling and everyone needs a shoulder from time to time, but any grown man not working to better his situation and finding comfort in another man funding his lifestyle isn't a man at all. Dudes sound like they're behaving like Instagram set outs. Support your own vices when we go out or I'm calling you my son.

 

[Grand Cru Boo]

I was going to make a thread. I have a friend that is habitually broke. Never have any dough to do anything but stay with weed to smoke. I come to the conclusion that at this point in time, I can’t mess with anyone who is ok with not doing more to better themselves. Smh

 

[Wink Beaufield]

The worst is if they're family members.

Got an uncle that's jobless and stay trying to pocket watch other family members when they in the store. This nikka be straight up trying to tell my mom's and grandmother how to spend their money.

This is one of them family members that you say to yourself "l love them, but they ain't shyt"

 

[Noriega]

I deaded a lot of nikkas I grew up with for just having a broke nikka mentality. I’m not rich by any means but when you 22-23 still working the same retail or food/hospitality you worked in high school it’s obviously due to a lack of ambition.

Mfs still care bout shoe releases, blowing half they check on weed and still live at the crib.

They stay asking me how to get into the construction field, I don’t even bother wasting my time trying to put them on. If you not willing to stop smoking weed to get into a career you’re a bum, simple

 

[P90]

Agreed if its taxing you financially can’t keep supporting “friends” like that.

On the other side, when I was dead ass broke my peoples used to cover me regularly when we went out. I’m in a different situation now, so I don’t mind consistently covering younger bros who haven’t come up yet.

 

[GodinDaFlesh]

LOL fukk em, I hate that shyt. Always wanting money or a ride, hell nah. :nahbro: My thing is, if you're broke you shouldn't be going out like that. Get your life in order *then* partake.

 

[⠀X ⠀]

Imagine having a broke and stupid friend. There's this one guy in my social circle who We always have to pay for, when we go out to eat, and he really just isn't that bright, and is always in some kinda bad luck situation.

He's almost like a brother though so we can't just drop him.

 

[Amused Mastery]

I don’t mind covering a friend every now and then, but if there’s a pattern of them asking for money every time we go out

 

[invalid]

This thread was low key depressing af.

 

[CreepyMcCreeperson]

My friends have money, but most of them are married with kids. So socializing is usually done at someone’s house.

And when they do go out, it’s usually with other couples.

 

[Crude]

Didn't read all that, but I'll tell you association breeds assimilation.

Choose your friends wisely eagles don't flock with crows just like rich people don't flock with bums.

Surround yourself with people on a level you aspire to be.