If men see women who like to go on girls trips and like to party without their man as a red flag...

[Scustin Bieburr]

Ladies of the coli, weigh in. Fellas, weigh in on your experiences if you've been the type to say "go ahead, have fun" when your girl wanted to engage in these activities without you. How did she react? did she think it was odd that you didn't try to stop her or ask to be included?

In my personal experience, women have picked up on the fact that I'm bothered by that so they don't even attempt it. However, I have had experiences where a girl I was seeing(but wasn't serious with) got suspicious when I was nonchalant when she told me she was going to party with her friends.

 

[Turbulent]

-If i truly trust her, i don't care. If i don't trust her, it's bushes.

-I don't trust most women.

-When there is mutual trust and i was unbothered, she was not suspicious because everything seemed normal.

 

[folasade]

It's a red flag for him then that's my red flag for him. It likely means that he's insecure, controlling and potentially abusive from my experience. Having friends and maintaining those relationships are important to me. And in most cases, if he goes with us then he's not going to have a good time, so he can't complain. And if there's no trust then why even stick around? I've dealt with it a lot and it's nothing but headaches. You end up just sitting at home miserable and isolated while he's out with his friends. If a person is going to cheat they're going to find a way. Being controlling and making them codependent won't change that and isn't healthy.

Now, if y'all aren't in a relationship, then it doesn't matter.

 

[CrimsonTider]

Ladies of the coli, weigh in. Fellas, weigh in on your experiences if you've been the type to say "go ahead, have fun" when your girl wanted to engage in these activities without you. How did she react? did she think it was odd that you didn't try to stop her or ask to be included?

In my personal experience, women have picked up on the fact that I'm bothered by that so they don't even attempt it. However, I have had experiences where a girl I was seeing(but wasn't serious with) got suspicious when I was nonchalant when she told me she was going to party with her friends.

Grow up

 

[Bar Razor]

My girl runs a travel group for women and travels frequently. She also uses it to get comps for our own personal trips. As I’ve never been insecure I have no issue with it. My philosophy has always been if someone is going to step out on you they’re going to step out on you. Being controlling and trying to police what they do is therefore a waste of time. Get with someone who you’re on the same page with and shows you respect and that’s the best you can hope for in a relationship.

 

[ExodusNirvana]

Trust people.

Trust them to be exactly who they are once they have revealed their true selves to you.

Then move accordingly.

 

[OneManGang]

My girl runs a travel group for women and travels frequently. She also uses it to get comps for our own personal trips. As I’ve never been insecure I have no issue with it. My philosophy has always been if someone is going to step out on you they’re going to step out on you. Being controlling and trying to police what they do is therefore a waste of time. Get with someone who you’re on the same page with and shows you respect and that’s the best you can hope for in a relationship.

A mature response in TLR



Personally I stitch a AirTag into all my bytches bags and require frequent FT check ins

 

[intra vires]

Ladies of the coli, weigh in. Fellas, weigh in on your experiences if you've been the type to say "go ahead, have fun" when your girl wanted to engage in these activities without you. How did she react? did she think it was odd that you didn't try to stop her or ask to be included?

In my personal experience, women have picked up on the fact that I'm bothered by that so they don't even attempt it. However, I have had experiences where a girl I was seeing(but wasn't serious with) got suspicious when I was nonchalant when she told me she was going to party with her friends.

Let's be more broad in this construction. So do you have an issue with "girl's trips" and "partying" or her socializing away from you in general?

Say she and her friends were going to Universal Studios in Orlando for a week, would that be a problem? Would her going away for a weekend for her friend's baby shower or simply to visit some friends be a problem?

Do you not trust her around her friends or something? I assume you'd have a baseline level of trust to be in a relationship with a person.

 

[cyndaquil]

Tell her to go and be excited then cheat on her while she is gone to make sure you are on an even playing field if she does cheat



Bonus points if the woman you cheat with is ugly

 

[maxamusa]

OP you're all over the place; you started off with trips....but she can't go party with her friends?


you're playing yourself.


thats prime time for fukkery when she's gone and you don't even know

I'm ordering fast food......watching oldschool comedies......getting drunk/high AF......abusing myself with her fanciest lotion

 

[Scustin Bieburr]

Let's be more broad in this construction. So do you have an issue with "girl's trips" and "partying" or her socializing away from you in general?

Say she and her friends were going to Universal Studios in Orlando for a week, would that be a problem? Would her going away for a weekend for her friend's baby shower or simply to visit some friends be a problem?

Do you not trust her around her friends or something? I assume you'd have a baseline level of trust to be in a relationship with a person.

I'm talking about the situations I described in the OP as they tend to be the thing that comes up the most when it comes to men feeling like they cant trust the women theyre with.

We've seen high profile cases of women being extremely intimate with a man at the club and his live reaction when he finds out. We've seen cases of women being caught cheating on girls trips.

The reality is a cheater will cheat no matter what. If you get the sense that the person youre with could and would cheat on you, its a futile effort to try and stop that activity. I'm at an age now where most people in my age group dont go to the club and would prefer to go on vacation with their partner or with other couples instead.

Part of the reason I dont commit to women in their 20s is because they do want to be doing shyt like that and I think back to how annoyed I would get when I heard "I have a man" when I was at a party or the club. I had friends at the time whose response to that was "where he at?" Or "what that got to do with me?" and they pressed on anyway until she was willing to step out on her man.

Suffice to say, I cut those nggas off because thats disgusting behavior to me. My own experience makes me think "nah, not worth it" when it comes to being with a woman who wants to do activities where there's a high likelihood that people there are single and trying to get some sex. I prefer women in my own age group because they're perfectly content just relaxing at home or going to restaurants, movie theaters, concerts etc. With their friends or with me. I think when you get older and have different life experiences you get a kind of sixth sense when it comes to people. Its an instinct that tells you "this person would fold" and you end the relationship early because that feeling that you cant trust the person doesnt fade.

 

[Piff Perkins]

If you don't trust or respect your partner you shouldn't be in a relationship. Straight up, it's really that simple. The thing that kills me is that these convos are driven by men who aren't really social and don't do shyt with their brehs. Guys trips used to be so common that every generation had a "guys night out" movie (The Hangover for instance). And while guys still do this, including myself, there seem to be way more guys who don't. Which is why the discourse over girl's trips exists. I don't care if my girl goes on a vacation with her girls. I tell her to have fun. If I worry about anything it's just general "worrying about safety" shyt that I always worry about whether she's on vacation or driving home at night.

Women partying is not a problem to me. It's not even something I think about when it comes to my girl. She doesn't party much but if she's out with her girls I...don't care. I don't tell her how to dress, I don't tell her how to behave, etc. Because I trust and respect her. And she has never given me reason to be concerned.

 

[010101]

your girl acting single*

 

[Rasille]

It depends. If it’s a one off. Then no need to trip. But if she’s constantly going on girls trips every few months then it’s a red flag. When you’re in a relationship you prefer to go with your partner. Not always going with your friends.

 

[Selena]

I have been on a couple girl's trips before and it's a green flag to me personally. It shows me that he fully trusts me and also not on any bad co-dependency shyt.