Now me I haven't had a lot of sex in my time. I consistently cock block myself and then reassure myself that my right hand is faithful and better than any mistress. I coulda had a lot more sex in my time but I have a meddling mind and standards that don't belong to me. It wouldn't take too long to sum up my sex life and it would go a little like this- Lost my virginity, got bored mid-way through and pretended it was all over... went to the toilet, had a piss forgetting about the condom in the process. It could have been the start of an epic water balloon fight. Got a hand-job by a fatty in a car park while it was pouring with rain. Got choked by an Asian Australian girl at Oktoberfest. fukked a Canadian chick while an old Asian lady was trying to sleep in the bed above (hostel life).... raw dogged a french girl that looked disconcertingly like me while a religious show talking about sin and how I need to be saved played in the background. Luckily she didn't understand English. I hope it was consensual... it must have been, she slipped it in. Anyway I could go on, but not for that long if you catch my drift.
But this isn't a place to talk about our failures. No its for the opposite. My proudest moment was when I was sleeping with this English girl, she had a quarter Armenian in her. She was my perfect girl. She had everything, body, personality and boyfriend... well that last part, I'm convinced girls are worse on the cheating front than guys. She looks similar to the pornstar Ashlyn something, I have a few of her vids and its great. It's like I'm w@nking into a time machine... I remember the first time I got her naked. She was lying on her back, sucking in her stomach so I could see her ribs, and those two fun bags of joy sat so contently on top. I motorboated that shyt... like there was no tomorrow. I guess what I'm trying to say is that she swallowed everytime.
But this isn't a place to talk about our failures. No its for the opposite. My proudest moment was when I was sleeping with this English girl, she had a quarter Armenian in her. She was my perfect girl. She had everything, body, personality and boyfriend... well that last part, I'm convinced girls are worse on the cheating front than guys. She looks similar to the pornstar Ashlyn something, I have a few of her vids and its great. It's like I'm w@nking into a time machine... I remember the first time I got her naked. She was lying on her back, sucking in her stomach so I could see her ribs, and those two fun bags of joy sat so contently on top. I motorboated that shyt... like there was no tomorrow. I guess what I'm trying to say is that she swallowed everytime.
