So I'm flying back to Florida, early ass flight, I'm tryna just nap the shyt away when low and behold this muhfugga with the aisle seat comes along (because of course I'm 6'2 200lbs and have to sit in the middle like a bytch) and he's fidgeting around, tweaking like he's off some pure Columbian, completely ignoring my personal space, bumping shoulders, flailing around, it's crazy. So before we even take off I look him dead in his eyes like "you good 
" he's like "yeah I'm good what's up 
" so I'm thinking that's enough for him to get the hint. So twenty minutes in the sky I got my elbow on the back of the arm rest, with the whole top half empty if he really needs to lean on the shyt, but instead he's dead ass slowly pushing my arm off like a lil bad ass kid. So I'm like "yo what's the problem 
" he's like "i'm trying to get some elbow room on the arm rest 
" this is when I know my temper is gonna flare up. I can troll and shoot the shyt all day online, but in real life I don't play that shyt at all. So I'm like "dog the whole top half of the arm rest is empty". He say some "oh okay cool." So he's fidgeting around being an ass and I'm just sitting there tryna woosah finally he gets up to go to the bathroom. I'm like cool. I nod off n go back to sleep. I get woken up to a grown ass man LITERALLY LAYING ON MY SHOULDER BRO like tryna be an a$$hole he's shifted his entire body to where he's leaning off the front part of the arm rest completely onto me.
I lose it. Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man behave this childish, and I've never even come close to blows before on an airplane. I'm like "dog what the fukk is your problem, why the hell are you leaning on me". So I guess he wants to match my aggression because he gets to talking crazy "idk who the fukk you're talking to" " you're hogging all the arm rest" I say flat out man i don't know what kinda drugs you on but you'll get folded up on this bytch talking to me like that"
So he's mumbling some more shyt mad as hell then goes back to playing his Nintendo Switch. Grown ass goofy playing Mario Kart tryna get tough with his bytch on the plane. Last thing I said was "this plane ain't gonna be in the air forever". I take it he took the hint because there was no more jockeying for the arm rest, he left me the fukk alone and I did the same.
Then we land. He stands up fast af and grabs his shyt, but now he's tryna look tough in front of his girl who's across the aisle. I stand up, grab my bag, and this is when I notice I'm TOWERING over him. Like literally I can see clearly directly over his head. Im not a bully and I don't like bullies so at this point I'm like ahh shyt and my aggression is pretty much gone. Welp his Napoleon complex is in full effect cuz he's still tryna passively fukk with me, scooting back so he can bump into me. Did it like three times before I finally say loud enough for him and his girl to hear "I just don't understand this motherfukker, still tryna start shyt and not even near my weight class." bytch ass kept silent. Scurried off the plane and avoided eye contact ever since we was still in the air
tl;Dr I'm not gonna lie that Mario kart shyt looked pretty lit, might have to download the .NSP for my phone/switch
" he's like "yeah I'm good what's up " so I'm thinking that's enough for him to get the hint. So twenty minutes in the sky I got my elbow on the back of the arm rest, with the whole top half empty if he really needs to lean on the shyt, but instead he's dead ass slowly pushing my arm off like a lil bad ass kid. So I'm like "yo what's the problem " he's like "i'm trying to get some elbow room on the arm rest " this is when I know my temper is gonna flare up. I can troll and shoot the shyt all day online, but in real life I don't play that shyt at all. So I'm like "dog the whole top half of the arm rest is empty". He say some "oh okay cool." So he's fidgeting around being an ass and I'm just sitting there tryna woosah finally he gets up to go to the bathroom. I'm like cool. I nod off n go back to sleep. I get woken up to a grown ass man LITERALLY LAYING ON MY SHOULDER BRO like tryna be an a$$hole he's shifted his entire body to where he's leaning off the front part of the arm rest completely onto me.I lose it. Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man behave this childish, and I've never even come close to blows before on an airplane. I'm like "dog what the fukk is your problem, why the hell are you leaning on me". So I guess he wants to match my aggression because he gets to talking crazy "idk who the fukk you're talking to" " you're hogging all the arm rest" I say flat out man i don't know what kinda drugs you on but you'll get folded up on this bytch talking to me like that"
So he's mumbling some more shyt mad as hell then goes back to playing his Nintendo Switch. Grown ass goofy playing Mario Kart tryna get tough with his bytch on the plane. Last thing I said was "this plane ain't gonna be in the air forever". I take it he took the hint because there was no more jockeying for the arm rest, he left me the fukk alone and I did the same.
Then we land. He stands up fast af and grabs his shyt, but now he's tryna look tough in front of his girl who's across the aisle. I stand up, grab my bag, and this is when I notice I'm TOWERING over him. Like literally I can see clearly directly over his head. Im not a bully and I don't like bullies so at this point I'm like ahh shyt and my aggression is pretty much gone. Welp his Napoleon complex is in full effect cuz he's still tryna passively fukk with me, scooting back so he can bump into me. Did it like three times before I finally say loud enough for him and his girl to hear "I just don't understand this motherfukker, still tryna start shyt and not even near my weight class." bytch ass kept silent. Scurried off the plane and avoided eye contact ever since we was still in the air
tl;Dr I'm not gonna lie that Mario kart shyt looked pretty lit, might have to download the .NSP for my phone/switch
Randomly assigned seats, let me take my leave. I make it a rule to not troll the seatically challenged.
.
