It must be that time of year again when everyone is unhappy with my scenarios because their favorite teams do not fare as well as they want. I've written up my list of how good each team is, in order from 32 to 1, as well as my projected record for them this season. I'm just calling it how I see it, so don't get mad if your team isn't as high as you would want them to be, just ask about it
That throwing motion just looks so awkward it's not even funny
32. Jacksonville Jaguars (2-14) - This is clearly the least talented team in the league point blank. As much as I would like them to win 5-6 games this year and make more progress, it seems next to impossible considering that the Jaguars are completely inept offensively and will likely be worse without Blackmon for an entire season. Their defense will be made worse by the fact that the offense literally won't be able to sustain a drive to keep them off the field. Expect Blake Bortles to be thrown somewhere into the mix by Week 6
31. Oakland Raiders (3-13) - If the Raiders were in any other division, I could peg them for 6-7 wins. But the problem is that not only do they play in the AFC West, but they are relying on players past their prime to resurge this team. If you bring in a couple of veterans to help a youth movement, that's one thing, but they're putting all their faith in players that are on the wrong side of 30. Unless we see the MJD of 2010, don't count on the Raiders doing too much this season. I actually think they'll improve but it won't reflect in their record at all because their schedule is absolutely brutal
30. St. Louis Rams (4-12) - Before Sam Bradford tore his ACL again, I actually had this team finishing 8-8, ahead of the Cardinals, and making some real progress towards turning the corner. However, with Shaun Hill at QB, things change dramatically. Hill is a great backup QB, one of the best in the league, but the lack of receivers to throw to is going to hurt him. The Rams' defense is legit, but it's still a notable notch below the rest of the NFC West, and in a division where defense dominates and you don't have a good offense, you're going to spend most of the year playing catch up, which never ends well
29. NY Jets (4-12) - Can someone explain to me how the Jets went 8-8 last season? It took multiple hail maries to get them there, and I don't think Geno will improve at all this season, despite everyone endlessly repeating that he "had the 2nd highest QBR for the last 4 weeks of the season". First off, 4 weeks is way too small of a sample size, and 2nd, Christian Ponder had a higher QBR than Tony Romo in 2012, where is he at now? Also, there is no way Eric Decker even remotely approaches his production during the last 2 seasons, I see about 600-800 yards from him as a #1 receiver, especially with Geno Smith throwing him the ball
28. Minnesota Vikings (5-11) - The good news is, the Vikings may not be the worst defense in the league this year. The bad news is, that's not saying much. Bridgewater should be starting halfway through the season, while Matt Cassel is still serviceable enough and has some stuff to work with on offense with Peterson, Jennings, and Patterson, how often is that enough to win you games when the other side of the ball is completely overmatched?
27. Tennessee Titans (5-11) - I actually like the hire of Ken Whisenhunt. Yes, Kurt Warner was the main reason that Cardinals team went to the Super Bowl, but he also managed to reel out an 8-8 season in 2011 with the Three Stooges at QB. But even if Jake Locker can prove that he can manage to stay healthy for an entire season, the Titans still have an uphill battle to face this year, especially without Chris Johnson. They do have one of the more underrated receiving corps in the league with Kendall Wright, Justin Hunter, and Nate Washington, and Wright and Hunter could be one of the better duos in the league in 2-3 years, but as of right now, the Titans are still a team that nobody expects much of coming into 2014
I bet the Dolphins are kinda wishing they had this guy back right about now
26. Miami Dolphins (5-11) - Is it possible that Ryan Tannehill has reached his peak already? I say that only because his offensive line is so unbelievably bad that it may continue to hinder his development this season. I like his ability to pass in the pocket within 10-15 yards, but his accuracy on deep balls is very mediocre, as he fails to hit his receivers in stride, and with Mike Wallace being mostly a 1 dimensional deep threat at wide receiver, it will be hard for them to connect consistently yet again this season
25. Cleveland Browns (5-11) - I'm so glad that Browns management made the decision to start the better player at QB this season, because there's no way Manziel is ready to start. Let's not forget, Brian Hoyer won all 3 of his starts last season and the season may have been salvageable if he had not torn his ACL in Week 5. That being said, the Browns are still the clear cut worst team in the division, and though I expect Hoyer to be a notable improvement over whatever QB the Browns have trotted out the last few years, I don't think it will translate to an improvement in the win column, especially with the lack of Josh Gordon for most of the season
24. Dallas Cowboys (6-10) - I actually feel as if I'm being generous with this prediction, because things could get ugly in Dallas real fast. Is it possible that this defense, as bad as it was last season, could actually be worse, without Ware, Hatcher, or Lee at all? The offense is going to have to be able to keep the defense off the field, because it's one of the biggest liabilities in the entire league. However, is that even possible when you run the ball only 10 times a game? Their defense will keep other teams in games regardless of how good the opposing offense is. It's one of those units that just makes you cringe when watching it
23. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (6-10) - Let me start this out by saying that I am actually a fan of the improvements that the Bucs have made. Lovie Smith is a great coach who never should have been fired by the Bears. That being said, I don't understand the hype around Josh McCown, he played well last season in relief of Jay Cutler but really only had 1 spectacular game, and that was against one of the worst defenses of all time. How are we supposed to believe that a 35 year old journeyman QB is "a whole level above" Mike Glennon, who actually played very well for his rookie season, throwing 19 TDs to only 9 INTs last season? I don't get all the buzz around Josh McCown. Either way, the Bucs still have a ways to go to be on the level of the other 3 teams in the NFC South
22. Buffalo Bills (7-9) - The Bills may just be the 2nd best team in the AFC East, but that's about as meaningful as throwing for 100 yards in a game against the Cowboys defense. We still know almost nothing about EJ Manuel, he didn't even really show us flashes of anything last season because he was out almost all the time. Hopefully the Bills will use CJ Spiller more this year, and Mike Williams was a great addition to the team. Mario Williams is also starting to play up to his contract. It's hard to see the Bills doing any better than .500 though
This guy is going to have to hit opposing tacklers with the same passion that he hit his wife with
if the Ravens want to have a bounceback season
21. Baltimore Ravens (7-9) - The Ravens realistically could be as high as 10 wins, but I simply don't trust their offense. Their defense will undoubtedly keep them in games throughout the year, but I don't have faith in Flacco unless he somehow returns to the same level of the 2012 postseason run. I'm not even sure Ray Rice being out for 2 games will affect them much at all given that Rice was so bad last season. Also not sure how Torrey Smith as a #1 wide receiver will continue to fare
20. Kansas City Chiefs (7-9) - Definitely the biggest fluke of last year, the Chiefs will not be starting 9-0 again since the NFL isn't allowing them to create their own schedule this year (daily double for $2000, who can guess the reference, go!). I'm willing to bet that Alex Smith peaked last season, because there's no way he would be worth $18 million in any other season. Hopefully the Chiefs don't pay him that much, but seeing how desperate teams are for QBs, there's a chance that happens. Dwayne Bowe also needs to start playing like a true #1 receiver again for the Chiefs to have any chance of repeating their 2013 success. Don't count on the Chiefs breaking their streak of 20 consecutive seasons without a playoff win though
19. Washington Redskins (7-9) - There's no question the Redskins will be much improved this season. For starters, RG3 didn't even play that "bad" last season, he just wasn't on the level of his rookie season, and frankly it would have taken a lot to match that level of play. There's no way they win only 3 games again. They also added DeSean Jackson and Andre Roberts to complete one of the best receiving corps in the league. The one thing that will hold them back from being better is, of course, their defense. Jason Hatcher was a great signing but Tracy Porter will not save this secondary. It's not 100% clear as of now whether the Redskins defense is closer to the unit that ranked in the middle of the pack in terms of yards allowed (18th) or closer to the unit that ranked dead last in points allowed. I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt considering that the offense turned the ball over 34 times last season, 2nd worst in the league to only Houston, but the defense still has to take multiple steps forward if the Redskins want to contend with the Eagles for the NFC East
18. Detroit Lions (7-9) - With the signing of Golden Tate, the Lions finally have a wide receiver capable of making game changing plays next to Calvin Johnson. Nate Burleson was a reliable #2 receiver but never a consistent deep threat and was well past his prime, not to mention Golden Tate is just about to enter his prime at age 26 and is coming off his best season as a pro. However, there's no reason to think that this will magically mean that Matthew Stafford will stop forcing jump balls to Calvin Johnson. More importantly, is Ndamakong Suh the guy that you want to pay $18 million to? I also don't like the decision to get rid of Louis Delmas. That Lions secondary is quietly getting worse and worse and I don't think they will be able to surpass the Bears or Packers
After much analysis, I've reached a determination on whether Carson Palmer is the guy that
can lead this team to the next level. It's still a no
17. Arizona Cardinals (7-9) - And the award for most overrated team of the offseason goes to... Make no mistake about it, that defense will be legitimately feared this upcoming season. And the Antonio Cromartie signing only tremendously helps a secondary that was already in the top half of the league with Jerraud Powers starting opposite of Patrick Peterson. A healthy Tyrann Mathieu for a full season doesn't hurt either. However, the loss of Karlos Dansby cannot be ignored. Are we going to pretend that a 34 year old Larry Foote and a 36 year old John Abraham are going to save this linebacking corp, despite Abraham recording 11.5 sacks last season? But the main concern I have about the Cardinals is on offense. Carson Palmer is a nice stop gap QB, but I don't think he can be counted on to put up huge numbers, especially behind an offensive line that is still a work in progress. And then there's the issue with Larry Fitzgerald, who, despite what everyone is saying, is NOT a top 10 receiver anymore. You can't deny that he's lost a step and that he's not what he once was after 2 straight seasons of failing to reach 1000 yards. I think 7 wins is a pretty reasonable projection for a team that plays in arguably the toughest division in football
16. Houston Texans (8-8) - The Texans' 2013 season was definitely an anomaly. They won't get back to the playoffs this season, but they will likely be the 2nd best team in the AFC South, although that is saying little to nothing. Ryan Fitzpatrick is nothing more than a quality spot starter, but he is still the best QB on the roster right now and played fairly well as a replacement for Jake Locker last season in Tennessee. And then, of course, there's the always potent JJ Watt - Jadeveon Clowney duo. The problem with the Texans will continue to be their offense though. While they were able to move the ball effectively last season, coming in at 11th in total yardage, they were dead last in turnovers and 2nd to last in points per game to only Jacksonville. Given that they likely won't be throwing pick 6s in 5 straight games again this season, I'm willing to bet on a bounce back season because they also had quite a bit of bad luck last year, but not one on the level of the 2012 Colts
That throwing motion just looks so awkward it's not even funny
32. Jacksonville Jaguars (2-14) - This is clearly the least talented team in the league point blank. As much as I would like them to win 5-6 games this year and make more progress, it seems next to impossible considering that the Jaguars are completely inept offensively and will likely be worse without Blackmon for an entire season. Their defense will be made worse by the fact that the offense literally won't be able to sustain a drive to keep them off the field. Expect Blake Bortles to be thrown somewhere into the mix by Week 6
31. Oakland Raiders (3-13) - If the Raiders were in any other division, I could peg them for 6-7 wins. But the problem is that not only do they play in the AFC West, but they are relying on players past their prime to resurge this team. If you bring in a couple of veterans to help a youth movement, that's one thing, but they're putting all their faith in players that are on the wrong side of 30. Unless we see the MJD of 2010, don't count on the Raiders doing too much this season. I actually think they'll improve but it won't reflect in their record at all because their schedule is absolutely brutal
30. St. Louis Rams (4-12) - Before Sam Bradford tore his ACL again, I actually had this team finishing 8-8, ahead of the Cardinals, and making some real progress towards turning the corner. However, with Shaun Hill at QB, things change dramatically. Hill is a great backup QB, one of the best in the league, but the lack of receivers to throw to is going to hurt him. The Rams' defense is legit, but it's still a notable notch below the rest of the NFC West, and in a division where defense dominates and you don't have a good offense, you're going to spend most of the year playing catch up, which never ends well
29. NY Jets (4-12) - Can someone explain to me how the Jets went 8-8 last season? It took multiple hail maries to get them there, and I don't think Geno will improve at all this season, despite everyone endlessly repeating that he "had the 2nd highest QBR for the last 4 weeks of the season". First off, 4 weeks is way too small of a sample size, and 2nd, Christian Ponder had a higher QBR than Tony Romo in 2012, where is he at now? Also, there is no way Eric Decker even remotely approaches his production during the last 2 seasons, I see about 600-800 yards from him as a #1 receiver, especially with Geno Smith throwing him the ball
28. Minnesota Vikings (5-11) - The good news is, the Vikings may not be the worst defense in the league this year. The bad news is, that's not saying much. Bridgewater should be starting halfway through the season, while Matt Cassel is still serviceable enough and has some stuff to work with on offense with Peterson, Jennings, and Patterson, how often is that enough to win you games when the other side of the ball is completely overmatched?
27. Tennessee Titans (5-11) - I actually like the hire of Ken Whisenhunt. Yes, Kurt Warner was the main reason that Cardinals team went to the Super Bowl, but he also managed to reel out an 8-8 season in 2011 with the Three Stooges at QB. But even if Jake Locker can prove that he can manage to stay healthy for an entire season, the Titans still have an uphill battle to face this year, especially without Chris Johnson. They do have one of the more underrated receiving corps in the league with Kendall Wright, Justin Hunter, and Nate Washington, and Wright and Hunter could be one of the better duos in the league in 2-3 years, but as of right now, the Titans are still a team that nobody expects much of coming into 2014
I bet the Dolphins are kinda wishing they had this guy back right about now
26. Miami Dolphins (5-11) - Is it possible that Ryan Tannehill has reached his peak already? I say that only because his offensive line is so unbelievably bad that it may continue to hinder his development this season. I like his ability to pass in the pocket within 10-15 yards, but his accuracy on deep balls is very mediocre, as he fails to hit his receivers in stride, and with Mike Wallace being mostly a 1 dimensional deep threat at wide receiver, it will be hard for them to connect consistently yet again this season
25. Cleveland Browns (5-11) - I'm so glad that Browns management made the decision to start the better player at QB this season, because there's no way Manziel is ready to start. Let's not forget, Brian Hoyer won all 3 of his starts last season and the season may have been salvageable if he had not torn his ACL in Week 5. That being said, the Browns are still the clear cut worst team in the division, and though I expect Hoyer to be a notable improvement over whatever QB the Browns have trotted out the last few years, I don't think it will translate to an improvement in the win column, especially with the lack of Josh Gordon for most of the season
24. Dallas Cowboys (6-10) - I actually feel as if I'm being generous with this prediction, because things could get ugly in Dallas real fast. Is it possible that this defense, as bad as it was last season, could actually be worse, without Ware, Hatcher, or Lee at all? The offense is going to have to be able to keep the defense off the field, because it's one of the biggest liabilities in the entire league. However, is that even possible when you run the ball only 10 times a game? Their defense will keep other teams in games regardless of how good the opposing offense is. It's one of those units that just makes you cringe when watching it
23. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (6-10) - Let me start this out by saying that I am actually a fan of the improvements that the Bucs have made. Lovie Smith is a great coach who never should have been fired by the Bears. That being said, I don't understand the hype around Josh McCown, he played well last season in relief of Jay Cutler but really only had 1 spectacular game, and that was against one of the worst defenses of all time. How are we supposed to believe that a 35 year old journeyman QB is "a whole level above" Mike Glennon, who actually played very well for his rookie season, throwing 19 TDs to only 9 INTs last season? I don't get all the buzz around Josh McCown. Either way, the Bucs still have a ways to go to be on the level of the other 3 teams in the NFC South
22. Buffalo Bills (7-9) - The Bills may just be the 2nd best team in the AFC East, but that's about as meaningful as throwing for 100 yards in a game against the Cowboys defense. We still know almost nothing about EJ Manuel, he didn't even really show us flashes of anything last season because he was out almost all the time. Hopefully the Bills will use CJ Spiller more this year, and Mike Williams was a great addition to the team. Mario Williams is also starting to play up to his contract. It's hard to see the Bills doing any better than .500 though
This guy is going to have to hit opposing tacklers with the same passion that he hit his wife with
if the Ravens want to have a bounceback season
21. Baltimore Ravens (7-9) - The Ravens realistically could be as high as 10 wins, but I simply don't trust their offense. Their defense will undoubtedly keep them in games throughout the year, but I don't have faith in Flacco unless he somehow returns to the same level of the 2012 postseason run. I'm not even sure Ray Rice being out for 2 games will affect them much at all given that Rice was so bad last season. Also not sure how Torrey Smith as a #1 wide receiver will continue to fare
20. Kansas City Chiefs (7-9) - Definitely the biggest fluke of last year, the Chiefs will not be starting 9-0 again since the NFL isn't allowing them to create their own schedule this year (daily double for $2000, who can guess the reference, go!). I'm willing to bet that Alex Smith peaked last season, because there's no way he would be worth $18 million in any other season. Hopefully the Chiefs don't pay him that much, but seeing how desperate teams are for QBs, there's a chance that happens. Dwayne Bowe also needs to start playing like a true #1 receiver again for the Chiefs to have any chance of repeating their 2013 success. Don't count on the Chiefs breaking their streak of 20 consecutive seasons without a playoff win though
19. Washington Redskins (7-9) - There's no question the Redskins will be much improved this season. For starters, RG3 didn't even play that "bad" last season, he just wasn't on the level of his rookie season, and frankly it would have taken a lot to match that level of play. There's no way they win only 3 games again. They also added DeSean Jackson and Andre Roberts to complete one of the best receiving corps in the league. The one thing that will hold them back from being better is, of course, their defense. Jason Hatcher was a great signing but Tracy Porter will not save this secondary. It's not 100% clear as of now whether the Redskins defense is closer to the unit that ranked in the middle of the pack in terms of yards allowed (18th) or closer to the unit that ranked dead last in points allowed. I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt considering that the offense turned the ball over 34 times last season, 2nd worst in the league to only Houston, but the defense still has to take multiple steps forward if the Redskins want to contend with the Eagles for the NFC East
18. Detroit Lions (7-9) - With the signing of Golden Tate, the Lions finally have a wide receiver capable of making game changing plays next to Calvin Johnson. Nate Burleson was a reliable #2 receiver but never a consistent deep threat and was well past his prime, not to mention Golden Tate is just about to enter his prime at age 26 and is coming off his best season as a pro. However, there's no reason to think that this will magically mean that Matthew Stafford will stop forcing jump balls to Calvin Johnson. More importantly, is Ndamakong Suh the guy that you want to pay $18 million to? I also don't like the decision to get rid of Louis Delmas. That Lions secondary is quietly getting worse and worse and I don't think they will be able to surpass the Bears or Packers
After much analysis, I've reached a determination on whether Carson Palmer is the guy that
can lead this team to the next level. It's still a no
17. Arizona Cardinals (7-9) - And the award for most overrated team of the offseason goes to... Make no mistake about it, that defense will be legitimately feared this upcoming season. And the Antonio Cromartie signing only tremendously helps a secondary that was already in the top half of the league with Jerraud Powers starting opposite of Patrick Peterson. A healthy Tyrann Mathieu for a full season doesn't hurt either. However, the loss of Karlos Dansby cannot be ignored. Are we going to pretend that a 34 year old Larry Foote and a 36 year old John Abraham are going to save this linebacking corp, despite Abraham recording 11.5 sacks last season? But the main concern I have about the Cardinals is on offense. Carson Palmer is a nice stop gap QB, but I don't think he can be counted on to put up huge numbers, especially behind an offensive line that is still a work in progress. And then there's the issue with Larry Fitzgerald, who, despite what everyone is saying, is NOT a top 10 receiver anymore. You can't deny that he's lost a step and that he's not what he once was after 2 straight seasons of failing to reach 1000 yards. I think 7 wins is a pretty reasonable projection for a team that plays in arguably the toughest division in football
16. Houston Texans (8-8) - The Texans' 2013 season was definitely an anomaly. They won't get back to the playoffs this season, but they will likely be the 2nd best team in the AFC South, although that is saying little to nothing. Ryan Fitzpatrick is nothing more than a quality spot starter, but he is still the best QB on the roster right now and played fairly well as a replacement for Jake Locker last season in Tennessee. And then, of course, there's the always potent JJ Watt - Jadeveon Clowney duo. The problem with the Texans will continue to be their offense though. While they were able to move the ball effectively last season, coming in at 11th in total yardage, they were dead last in turnovers and 2nd to last in points per game to only Jacksonville. Given that they likely won't be throwing pick 6s in 5 straight games again this season, I'm willing to bet on a bounce back season because they also had quite a bit of bad luck last year, but not one on the level of the 2012 Colts
this garbage list
