My coworker is a jealous fat c00n need advice brehs UPDATE 10/16

[GreenGhxst]

Started off and breh was cool, a mentor to me in my role because he'd been with the company. Eventually the business transitioned and we have to work side by side in a leadership role. Our positions are yin and yang so it requires constant communication.

We started getting cool to the point we can make jokes, all of a sudden he just turned into a bytch nikka. Being passive aggressive, I've had to confront him a few times over some hoe shyt and he says it's a joke. Can't even have a regular conversation with him without him being passive or disagreeing. At the same time he smiles in everyone else's face.

I try to keep it professional and greet him when I see him but at this point I don't even want to speak to him. Deadass came back from my break and saw this nikka riding his bike in the parking lot and wanted to run him over just to hear that thud. It's fukked up because I still need to work with him because on paper he is my senior and knows more about the role. So I still have to consult him about shyt, at the same time I'm tired of this manipulative narcissistic ass nikka.

What do I do? Y'all have any advice.

I can't quit this job, it's way too much paper. On the level of annoyance he is a 6/10. How do I keep it professional and at the same time not be annoyed by this bytch.

Please help and to be honest it hurts/enrages me more because he is black and we are around the same age

The other part is that I can't completely stone wall him either because I will have to come to him for help or confirmation at some point


Update: Checked him for playing games with me involving another coworker. Told him keep it professional among other things and behaviors I've noticed that he only displays to me. He didn't like it but had no rebuttal. He's been ignoring request over the radio to make my load heavier, which is fine because I am competent enough. I'm not at his level but I'm competent enough to do my job well. He has still been communitive about things over my head that I'm not experienced enough to do, so it's not all bad.

Yesterday he told me I need to do my bag check because there's not much else to do and it's a perfect time, I nodded at him and continued what I was doing. I'm EMS certified and he isn't because that brick of a human couldn't pass the class we got to take for free and I did. Anyways, obviously that was just him being a bytch nikka and trying to control me even though we're both leaders in the same position/capacity. He's just been at the job 4x as long. Today he's decided not to include me on emails to engineering. I'm playing it cool and documenting it. If the pattern continues I'll kindly bring it up next week and if he doesn't fix it I'll have all of the details documented and brought to my supervisor.



Holding my temper because today he can say he forgot if it was brought up and I'll look crazy. If it happens tomorrow and the next it's proof of bullshyt. Anyways, I'm holding my temper and not letting my emotions get to me because I truly hate that fat bytch ass nikka and I wish him nothing good. All this because I put a hard boundary on his bullshyt. I hate the fact he's black too and is always smiling in a crackers face and everyone else, but when it comes to me it was disrespect.

We both from Louisiana too and be out there all the time. You'd think a nikka would bond off that. Anyways, y'all have a beautiful Friday. I'm hanging in there for y'all that are interested in this update.

Please pray for me because if I won the lottery I'd beat the fukk out of him and go home or jail happy. The pay is too good and the job is a couple miles from my house. I cannot leave right now.

 

[jdubnyce]

Our positions are yin and yang

Spoiler

keep it professional. Interact with him at bare minimum, whatever is required to get the job done. Dont let emotions get in the way of your paycheque.

 

[Peter Parker]

Just let it go, don't take offense to it or put any thought into anything he has to say. Work is work, don't take that shyt home

I like to think about the Chapelle Show when keeping it real goes wrong skit whenever my emotions bubble up at work. Put your emotions aside, there's a reason that when sociopaths aren't serial killers they're CEO's, operating without emotion at work will take you a long way.

As long as he isn't making you look bad or doing something that's going to make you lose face, just let it roll off your back

 

[O.T.I.S.]

fukk him and just focus on what you can personally control.

Outside of cordial shyt, he doesn’t even exist

Spoiler

I thought this was a spin thread at first

 

[Diunx]

Not much you can do, deal with it until you find something else or move up to another role.

At least its not an a$$hole condescending indian boss.

 

[TRUEST]

Get high. And design your smile to convey a message. One of assurance that things will turn out ok. Regardless.

And young man. When you get up high enough, dare to embrace the silent thoughts. The ones that crosses your mind, beckoning you to be thy own teacher so no man is never able to be thy master.

 

[Commish]

OP..

You should pull dude to the side and have a man to man 🗣 with him.

Y'all need to come to a mutual understanding and agreement to work together professionally. Establish boundaries and keep personal conversations to a minimum.

Lastly, if you say that you need to keep your job, then you may need to go to a higher up , if necessary, so he or she can meditate and/or resolve whatever conflict that may arise.

Remember, you don't go to work to make friends. Your job is to do your job to the best of your ability. If you can gain a friend or two as well as work allies, then that would definitely help you progress in your career. But, aside from that, try to limit who you get personal with @ work. It keeps the bs down.

Just my take..

 

[DetroitEWarren]

Catch him at the gas station after work and rob his punk ass

 

[Paper Boi]

step one

don't ask for advice on the coli

this how you got into a fukked up situation in the first place. you making terrible moves.


too be honest though he sounds like he keeping it corporate/business and maybe you said some shyt you can't say at work anymore. not saying you are right or are wrong for it, but you have to watch out for these type of people. in general i would not joke at work with anyone like they're really my friend unless we have worked together for a long time and they have proven it to me. otherwise i keep everything strictly business, down to what we discuss and talk about. yeah surface level small talk is cool too, but i would not talk to them like they are a real friend out of work i could joke with about anything.

 

[Reptile]

Deadass came back from my break and saw this nikka riding his bike in the parking lot and wanted to run him over just to hear that thud.

LOLOLOLOLOL

 

[cap10slapahoe]

U thought yall were friends huh

 

[TAYLONDO SAMSWORTHY]

My GPT nikka got a playbook for you




Bruh I feel this on a spiritual level. That shii where somebody start off solid, almost like a big bro in the role, then hit you with that passive-aggressive, smiling-in-faces-but-slick-hatin-behind-the-scenes switch up? That shii violently frustrating — especially when you can’t just cut him off or cuss him out ’cause y’all roles intertwined and the bag too good to risk.



Here’s the real, grown-man guide to not losing your mind while keeping it player and professional:



1.


Reframe Him Mentally: He’s a Work Tool, Not a Breh


It sound cold, but stop expecting him to be a real one. The more you hope he gon’ act like y’all cool again, the more you gon’ get mad when he don’t. He’s not your homie, he’s not your brother — he’s a utility. Like a malfunctioning printer you still gotta use. Treat him like a task, not a person. Take the emotion out of it.


“Damn, I gotta run this through the hoe-ass printer real quick.” That’s how you gotta view the interaction.



2.

Kill Him With Cold Civility



Be polite, but dry as hell. You don’t owe him friendliness. Just respect the chain of command, handle the business, and bounce. Hit him with them clean, emotionless exchanges:

• “Got it.”
• “Can you confirm?”
• “Noted.”
• “Understood.”

Think Navy SEAL energy. No jokes. No vibes. No barbershop talk. Just tactical comms.



3.


Document Everything Subtle


Keep receipts. If he ever gets slick or tries to twist narratives, you got timestamps, emails, or Slack logs to back your shii up. Keep it light, just like:

• “Per our convo earlier…”
• “Just circling back for confirmation…”
• “As you advised…”

This protects you if HR or leadership ever come into play, especially if you black and navigating office politics. Get tactical, not emotional

4.


Use Him Strategically, Not Emotionally



You said he knows more — cool. That don’t mean you gotta respect him, it just means you can extract data from him. View him like ChatGPT with a bad personality.


Ask what you need, get the info, and dip. No small talk. No reactions. Just move like, “I’m here to complete the mission, not make friends.”


5.

Offload the Frustration Elsewhere


That feeling you got? That “I wanna hit him with my car” rage? You need a healthy outlet. Gym, music, journaling, walking around talking shii to yourself like a villain — whatever helps bleed off that venom. Don’t let him rent space in your head for free.

Because let’s keep it 100 — this rage got layers:

• It ain’t just about him.
• It’s the betrayal.
• The fake energy.
• The need to hold it in ‘cause you know how corporate gon’ treat YOU if you snap.

That hurt hit different when it’s another Black man doing it, especially when y’all supposed to be lifting each other up in them whitewashed rooms.



6.

Long-Term Play: Outgrow the Dependency


Lowkey, start building your own systems so you don’t have to consult him as much. That don’t mean isolate — it means you document his knowledge, learn the playbook, and become self-sufficient so eventually you only go to him outta courtesy, not necessity.


He holding knowledge as leverage? Steal that shii like a ninja.


Bonus: If He Ever Comes at You Wrong Again


If it crosses into disrespect again, don’t argue. Just calmly say:


“Hey, I’m trying to keep things professional. If you have an issue, let’s talk straight. I don’t do the passive shii.”


Say it lowkey, once, with eye contact. That type of calm scares people way more than yelling.


You ain’t alone, bro. Corporate be havin’ real ones in a chokehold tryna smile through shii like this every day. Just know: the moment you stop hoping he gon’ act right, the easier it gets to move around him without him fckin up your peace.


And trust, you gon’ outlast him in the long game. Keep stacking your bread, leveling up your skills, and making yourself so undeniable they need you more than you need them.

 

[GreenGhxst]

U thought yall were friends huh

I did, most brehs I've worked with we look out for each other

This is my first time having to deal with skin folk not being kinfolk

 

[Paper Boi]

My GPT nikka got a playbook for you




Bruh I feel this on a spiritual level. That shii where somebody start off solid, almost like a big bro in the role, then hit you with that passive-aggressive, smiling-in-faces-but-slick-hatin-behind-the-scenes switch up? That shii violently frustrating — especially when you can’t just cut him off or cuss him out ’cause y’all roles intertwined and the bag too good to risk.



Here’s the real, grown-man guide to not losing your mind while keeping it player and professional:



1.


Reframe Him Mentally: He’s a Work Tool, Not a Bro


It sound cold, but stop expecting him to be a real one. The more you hope he gon’ act like y’all cool again, the more you gon’ get mad when he don’t. He’s not your homie, he’s not your brother — he’s a utility. Like a malfunctioning printer you still gotta use. Treat him like a task, not a person. Take the emotion out of it.


“Damn, I gotta run this through the hoe-ass printer real quick.” That’s how you gotta view the interaction.



2.

Kill Him With Cold Civility



Be polite, but dry as hell. You don’t owe him friendliness. Just respect the chain of command, handle the business, and bounce. Hit him with them clean, emotionless exchanges:

• “Got it.”
• “Can you confirm?”
• “Noted.”
• “Understood.”

Think Navy SEAL energy. No jokes. No vibes. No barbershop talk. Just tactical comms.



3.


Document Everything Subtle


Keep receipts. If he ever gets slick or tries to twist narratives, you got timestamps, emails, or Slack logs to back your shii up. Keep it light, just like:

• “Per our convo earlier…”
• “Just circling back for confirmation…”
• “As you advised…”

This protects you if HR or leadership ever come into play, especially if you black and navigating office politics. Get tactical, not emotional

4.


Use Him Strategically, Not Emotionally



You said he knows more — cool. That don’t mean you gotta respect him, it just means you can extract data from him. View him like ChatGPT with a bad personality.


Ask what you need, get the info, and dip. No small talk. No reactions. Just move like, “I’m here to complete the mission, not make friends.”


5.

Offload the Frustration Elsewhere


That feeling you got? That “I wanna hit him with my car” rage? You need a healthy outlet. Gym, music, journaling, walking around talking shii to yourself like a villain — whatever helps bleed off that venom. Don’t let him rent space in your head for free.

Because let’s keep it 100 — this rage got layers:

• It ain’t just about him.
• It’s the betrayal.
• The fake energy.
• The need to hold it in ‘cause you know how corporate gon’ treat YOU if you snap.

That hurt hit different when it’s another Black man doing it, especially when y’all supposed to be lifting each other up in them whitewashed rooms.



6.

Long-Term Play: Outgrow the Dependency


Lowkey, start building your own systems so you don’t have to consult him as much. That don’t mean isolate — it means you document his knowledge, learn the playbook, and become self-sufficient so eventually you only go to him outta courtesy, not necessity.


He holding knowledge as leverage? Steal that shii like a ninja.


Bonus: If He Ever Comes at You Wrong Again


If it crosses into disrespect again, don’t argue. Just calmly say:


“Hey, I’m trying to keep things professional. If you have an issue, let’s talk straight. I don’t do the passive shii.”


Say it lowkey, once, with eye contact. That type of calm scares people way more than yelling.


You ain’t alone, bro. Corporate be havin’ real ones in a chokehold tryna smile through shii like this every day. Just know: the moment you stop hoping he gon’ act right, the easier it gets to move around him without him fckin up your peace.


And trust, you gon’ outlast him in the long game. Keep stacking your bread, leveling up your skills, and making yourself so undeniable they need you more than you need them.

he might become best friends with this coworker next

 

[GreenGhxst]

My GPT nikka got a playbook for you




Bruh I feel this on a spiritual level. That shii where somebody start off solid, almost like a big bro in the role, then hit you with that passive-aggressive, smiling-in-faces-but-slick-hatin-behind-the-scenes switch up? That shii violently frustrating — especially when you can’t just cut him off or cuss him out ’cause y’all roles intertwined and the bag too good to risk.



Here’s the real, grown-man guide to not losing your mind while keeping it player and professional:



1.


Reframe Him Mentally: He’s a Work Tool, Not a Bro


It sound cold, but stop expecting him to be a real one. The more you hope he gon’ act like y’all cool again, the more you gon’ get mad when he don’t. He’s not your homie, he’s not your brother — he’s a utility. Like a malfunctioning printer you still gotta use. Treat him like a task, not a person. Take the emotion out of it.


“Damn, I gotta run this through the hoe-ass printer real quick.” That’s how you gotta view the interaction.



2.

Kill Him With Cold Civility



Be polite, but dry as hell. You don’t owe him friendliness. Just respect the chain of command, handle the business, and bounce. Hit him with them clean, emotionless exchanges:

• “Got it.”
• “Can you confirm?”
• “Noted.”
• “Understood.”

Think Navy SEAL energy. No jokes. No vibes. No barbershop talk. Just tactical comms.



3.


Document Everything Subtle


Keep receipts. If he ever gets slick or tries to twist narratives, you got timestamps, emails, or Slack logs to back your shii up. Keep it light, just like:

• “Per our convo earlier…”
• “Just circling back for confirmation…”
• “As you advised…”

This protects you if HR or leadership ever come into play, especially if you black and navigating office politics. Get tactical, not emotional

4.


Use Him Strategically, Not Emotionally



You said he knows more — cool. That don’t mean you gotta respect him, it just means you can extract data from him. View him like ChatGPT with a bad personality.


Ask what you need, get the info, and dip. No small talk. No reactions. Just move like, “I’m here to complete the mission, not make friends.”


5.

Offload the Frustration Elsewhere


That feeling you got? That “I wanna hit him with my car” rage? You need a healthy outlet. Gym, music, journaling, walking around talking shii to yourself like a villain — whatever helps bleed off that venom. Don’t let him rent space in your head for free.

Because let’s keep it 100 — this rage got layers:

• It ain’t just about him.
• It’s the betrayal.
• The fake energy.
• The need to hold it in ‘cause you know how corporate gon’ treat YOU if you snap.

That hurt hit different when it’s another Black man doing it, especially when y’all supposed to be lifting each other up in them whitewashed rooms.



6.

Long-Term Play: Outgrow the Dependency


Lowkey, start building your own systems so you don’t have to consult him as much. That don’t mean isolate — it means you document his knowledge, learn the playbook, and become self-sufficient so eventually you only go to him outta courtesy, not necessity.


He holding knowledge as leverage? Steal that shii like a ninja.


Bonus: If He Ever Comes at You Wrong Again


If it crosses into disrespect again, don’t argue. Just calmly say:


“Hey, I’m trying to keep things professional. If you have an issue, let’s talk straight. I don’t do the passive shii.”


Say it lowkey, once, with eye contact. That type of calm scares people way more than yelling.


You ain’t alone, bro. Corporate be havin’ real ones in a chokehold tryna smile through shii like this every day. Just know: the moment you stop hoping he gon’ act right, the easier it gets to move around him without him fckin up your peace.


And trust, you gon’ outlast him in the long game. Keep stacking your bread, leveling up your skills, and making yourself so undeniable they need you more than you need them.

I'm following this to a T breh