Shoot the slow motion shots in 60p and your rapping part in 24p.
It looks weird when you shoot your rap scenes or the scenes that's not in slow motion in 60p.it gives it a camcorder look but for music videos you want that 24p motion picture movie look.
I heard a Lord of the Rings is being shot in 60p so who knows it might be the new thing! But they also got millions to work with and professional cameramen so keep that in mind.
Also do some color grading to your footage.mess around with contrast and your color balance. You will amazed at what a little color balance can do for your video.
Also when you shoot some extra stuff for your video make sure the viewer will enjoy it too. I had no idea why you gave us a view of some bricks for a few seconds.Make sure the extra stuff in your video have meaning to what your video is about.Don't try to hard in your video. That praying part looks to gimmicky and forced.
Follow those steps and your good to go.
