Ol’Otis
The Picasso of the Ghetto
i feel sorry them...i truly do 19 Men Share Stories of Being Raped By A Woman (NSFW)
1. “I must have said no a thousand times.”
Being raped by a woman isn’t cool and you aren’t “lucky”.
When I was 21 I was raped by the girl who was my girlfriend at the time. … The worst day of my life was when she decided to tie me up. She told me all the dirty things she was going to do to me while she kissed my neck and whispered into my ear as she tied my arms and legs down to the bed. Everything she said she was going to do was normal to me (suck me, ride me) so I let her tie me up. After I was tied up she asked me to try to break free and offered a reward to me if I could. She said she would be back and if I wasn’t free then I would miss out on the reward.
She came back and stood at the door and stared at me. She then told me how I wasn’t going to be rewarded because I couldn’t get out. She then told me she was going to punish me. Long story short, she ended up sodomizing me with her vibrator. I must have said no a thousand times. I was crying and begging her to stop which in hindsight probably made it worse. I was anally fukked, then she tried to ride me but I couldn’t even get up. I was so broken emotionally and in pain physically. She then got very mad that I couldn’t get it up which was never a problem. I was beaten for a while. Then the vibrator again while being hit. It lasted about 6 or 7 hours but felt like it was a dozen. For a while she just left it in me while she went in the other room to watch TV.
It was mid day when she tied me up and had been dark for a few hours after it was over. I ended up falling asleep tied up. I think I just passed out more from exhaustion of trying to break free/get her to stop. I woke up and I was untied in bed by myself. …
I ended up calling the police, which was the best decision I had ever made. The second I called them she calmed down and started to behave. They got there pretty quickly. Of course once they were there she played the damsel in distress and claimed that I was beating her up and choking her, etc. I told the cop everything that happened, which was embarrassing but worth it. They arrested her and she was jailed. … I had the option to press charges but ended up choosing not to after consulting with my lawyer.
Being raped has ruined my life for the time being.
2. “They said since it was a girl doing it to a guy, it was just ‘experimentation.'”
I’m a man. I was raped as a child. She was my cousin. About 15 or so, while I was four. I don’t remember a lot, either because I was so small or because I mentally blocked it, but I remember that she performed oral sex on me. Made me do the same to her. Stuck various things up my butt.
My mom called the police when I told her a few weeks later. They didn’t even investigate. They said since it was a girl doing it to a guy, it was just “experimentation.” Said it was okay.
3. “I thought, ‘Well, better to enjoy it than let it hurt me.'”
The way I lost my virginity could arguably be seen as rape.
She was stronger than I was at that age and there wasn’t much I could do about it.
I was turned on, but I really didn’t want it to happen.
But, happen it did.
It’s kind of interesting, in an abstract way, that your body can be aroused even though your rational mind is trying to find a way out of the situation.
… I basically reached a point where I could have been traumatized by it, but something just “clicked” and I thought, “Well, better to enjoy it than let it hurt me.”
4. “I repeatedly told her ‘no,’ but that didn’t matter.”
We had a huge fight and I told her I was done. If I even tried to restrain her a little I would have bruised her wrists and been in jail. I repeatedly told her “no,” but that didn’t matter. She wanted to “fix things.” I called the cops but they just asked her if she was OK and then left without doing anything.
Physically, yes, I could have gotten away but she was being very aggressive and after a close call I decided it wasn’t worth fighting over. I was not going to jail for this woman. I just laid there and let her do her thing. …
5. “Stated she was going to kill me.”
So for me it happened during the act. Actually it’s sorta complex. She started trying to suffocate me during, kept going. Had me in a situation where I couldn’t just overpower. Stated she was going to kill me. Kept fukking away at the other end while I started to suffocate properly. The physical pleasure remained intense while the mental trauma (which I didn’t understand the depth of for many days) was done, which set up very dark associations thereafter.
What I would say is at the time I was caught totally off guard. It changed me in that respect. I don’t relax around women in my bed anymore. Don’t trust them. Have full sex with many fewer than I could. Mainly because I bodily do not feel safe or relaxed with a guest. Totally changed me.
6. “I just kept telling her to no and shaking my head back and forth.”
I was 16 and heavily into drugs at that point in my life. …
I ended up at a buddy’s house with a couple other friends and had gotten pretty high. I was pretty much in the mindset that I just didn’t want to deal with my life right then. So I took a few hits of acid, smoked a lot of weed and had my fair share of drinks as well. I ended up just laying sprawled out on the floor in the downstairs rec room while everyone else was upstairs.
This guy’s stepsister evidently thought it was a good time to do what she wanted. She was a big girl and not saying this to be mean but I wouldn’t be surprised if she was at least twice my weight. I was so high I couldn’t muster the ability to get her off and away from me. I just kept telling her to no and shaking my head back and forth. Being on acid made the entire event pretty horrifying. Felt like I was being sucked into her and there was nothing I could do to save myself. …
The worst part of course was that I didn’t feel like I could tell anyone. We had had some police do a presentation on rape the year before in my health class. They had divided up the boys from the girls and had given a pretty in-depth presentation on it—they even touched on boys being raped—but only by men. They never even suggested that it was possible for women to take advantage of men. …
Traumatizing at the time. Confusing because of societal gender roles and standards forever after.
7. “It’s scary, and emotionally draining.”
It’s scary, and emotionally draining. I was confused, and felt pressured. Not only that, but living with the stigma that men should be strong and not be so weak is a struggle as well. So I kept it internally sealed for a long time. It is strange no matter how much you try not to think about it you do. You can have this great day, or get really happy then a flood of memories invade you of that moment, and you feel this dread that builds at the base of your stomach. Obviously I still struggle sometimes….
I was told once that there is a thing called a “fear boner” I guess that could be the explanation. I was disconnected not in sync with my body, my brain was in over drive mode. So it did its own thing.
8. “I did not want her, did not want that intimacy, it was a violation of my space, my grief, my mind.”
Well, I was (arguably) raped by my wife when she wanted a second child, and I did not… it was unpleasant in many ways. We’d lost our (original second) baby at birth, six months before, and were on the edge of divorce, and she wanted to keep me around. We had gone on a holiday. We barely spoke, she blamed me for the death. She’s not a nice person at the best of times, and this was one of the worst of times…
However, when she wants to be seductive, she is. Extraordinarily silky, and while my mind was trying to crawl out the back of my brain in a kind of numb disgust, my body was ready for action. Her on top, me pinned down, we conceived our second child.
At the time I was sure he wasn’t mine, that the insemination was cover for something else. That was an overpowering feeling, which went away when I got my kids DNA tested last year (my divorce lawyer’s advice), and found they are all mine. She was then, is still, pathologically unfaithful, so whether it was luck or planning that I fathered her kids, I can’t tell.
It is a horrid feeling when your body betrays you, whether it’s impotence or the opposite. I did not want her, did not want that intimacy, it was a violation of my space, my grief, my mind. It was a theft of my sperm, much like man-on-female rape is a theft of the woman’s precious sexuality.
9. “My Johnson was bleeding and terrible sore.”
Not good at all.
I really can’t get over it now. It’s been about 2 years since it happened even though she was my girlfriend and all it wasn’t anywhere good or pleasurable. I really don’t like to go in my detail, but I was 14 she would get off of me and she was going at it like a madman. She did her best to ignore me and at the same time restrain me. After it was all over she got off and just walked out with a smile on her face. My Johnson was bleeding and terrible sore.
Since that happened my fear of the opposite gender became a little stronger. Yea it’s a double whammy to be raped by something you fear.
I can’t think of anyone that would honestly have a clue to what happened to me that one night, but it’s all gone now. 16, raped and blinded by fear.
10. “I strongly, emphatically and repeatedly said ‘NO! STOP! NO MEANS NO!'”
I was raped by my ex girlfriend. We were both about 19-20. She tied me to the bed for a ‘teasing’ blowjob. Ok cool! But then she got on top of me even though I strongly, emphatically and repeatedly said ‘NO! STOP! NO MEANS NO!’ (this is what school/public safety infomercials taught me to do) But she didn’t care and she did a good job with the restraints. She got on top of me and rode me until I orgasmed against my will. I felt powerless and ashamed. I told some people but they kind of laughed it off. I think if gender roles were reversed it would’ve been taken more seriously.
11.“I froze, and just checked out in a dissociated state.”
Objectively, not terrible compared to other instances of abuse. Subjectively, it played on the abuse I went through as a child. Psychologically I wasn’t the mid 20s 6’1 220 pound dude present in the moment, I was that terrified 6 year old again. I froze, and just checked out in a dissociated state. I can’t really remember a timeline, but the images and sensations are burned in my mind. After effect was to effectively destroy any desire for sex or intimacy I may have had. Close to a decade later, still haven’t shaken it enough to try dating/etc. again.
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