Heafcliffe
Hope there's puddin' in the clink...
NOTE: Tried changing the thread title to "Taking the "high road" does not feel good but is worth it"
I have shared at length on the coli why my brother and I don't fux with my now deceased father's widow and her family. Long story short, this lady raised from 3 yo and, upon his death, things began to "separate" between the families over time. Gatherings were had and my side wasn't invited. Money was not allocated properly. Resentment began to fester. Communication was not open thus leading folks to
at times.
Well, a gathering was had recently to openly discuss "Why?" between all parties. Questions were answered. Misinterpretations were clarified. Fingers were pointed. Ultimately, it was discovered that I, Heafcliffe, was at the crux. People felt I disrespected them, which was a surprise to me because I felt the same.
As I listened and I soon realized that the issues they had were so.....mundane and trivial and petty. This lead me to the "high road." I noted the audience and adapted. I continued to respectfully listen and soon began to empathize. Rather than antagonizing the situation, I conceded when appropriate yet holding them accountable even though I was outnumbered. It was so rewarding to de-burden myself of years of confusion, anger, sadness and finally contempt. My conscience clear. For years, I prepped myself for an all-out yelling match to where I would be the victor but, as I sat there, I realized that maturity wins and, therefore, I began to see the incidents as a whole and not nitpick individual instances, thus taking the "high road." That backpack of emotions is now lighter.
Hope I am making sense. Anyone been in situations like this?
I have shared at length on the coli why my brother and I don't fux with my now deceased father's widow and her family. Long story short, this lady raised from 3 yo and, upon his death, things began to "separate" between the families over time. Gatherings were had and my side wasn't invited. Money was not allocated properly. Resentment began to fester. Communication was not open thus leading folks to
at times.Well, a gathering was had recently to openly discuss "Why?" between all parties. Questions were answered. Misinterpretations were clarified. Fingers were pointed. Ultimately, it was discovered that I, Heafcliffe, was at the crux. People felt I disrespected them, which was a surprise to me because I felt the same.
As I listened and I soon realized that the issues they had were so.....mundane and trivial and petty. This lead me to the "high road." I noted the audience and adapted. I continued to respectfully listen and soon began to empathize. Rather than antagonizing the situation, I conceded when appropriate yet holding them accountable even though I was outnumbered. It was so rewarding to de-burden myself of years of confusion, anger, sadness and finally contempt. My conscience clear. For years, I prepped myself for an all-out yelling match to where I would be the victor but, as I sat there, I realized that maturity wins and, therefore, I began to see the incidents as a whole and not nitpick individual instances, thus taking the "high road." That backpack of emotions is now lighter.
Hope I am making sense. Anyone been in situations like this?
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