The BrokeTales thread...Share your stories

[El Coupeacabra]

Sup y'all. It's Friday and we got paid today. The discussion came up...what's the brokest you've ever been?? Some very stories got told and some very stories got told. Imma share some of mine and some of the ones I heard and I encourage you to do the same.

And don't give me none of that 6fig6cert bullshyt I know its some broke brehs on here...this is a safe zone though brehs share your brokeness!

 

[SuperGrizzy]

Once had a check that was $112...


But I don't like to think about that

 

[El Coupeacabra]

Story 1: The Drought Season

Soundtrack :

So...back in like 2013 I was kicking 3 or 4 different positive-productivity "supplements" on campus.

Around that time I had started seeing this girl...I was buying her all kinds of shyt...taking her to Mavs games...

Long story short both my main hookup and my backup hookup had to...erm...retire when Mr. Guzmán got tagged and the lines got fukked up.

So a nikka had to go the honest way.

After like 3 months of making $8.50 my shyt was fuuuuuked up Old girl like "You haven't taken me out to eat in forever "

So I tried to finesse my way out brehs...I told her...the truth is...I've been learning to cook baby! So imma set the balcony at the apartment up like a bad ass restaurant and we gone do our thang...

So I go to the bank...I know its some bills bout to come out but a nikka only got like $200 I took ALL that shyt out...imma eat that $25 overdraft fee, fukk it.

Hit the store...cop some salmon and shyt...I actually get twice as much as I need so I can practice...cooked that shyt like a top chef...I'm thinking "man I'm bout to really do some shyt tomorrow night "

Wake up the next day... Prep my salmon, sit it in some marinade...

Go outside, set the balcony up with these fake suede tablecloths

Come back in...brehs...MY MOTHERfukkING LIGHTS GOT TURNED OFF.

I'm panicking and shyt, call TXU...she talmbout its $123 and it'll be back on in an hour...BUT I TOOK ALL THE MONEY OUT THE DANN BANK AND BOUGHT THIS DAMN FISH BREHS...check my account...bills done hit, my shyt negative as fukk...

I call baby girl...tell her the maintenece man coming to fix the AC so we can just go out to eat (I'm literally on the phone like ).

We go eat...cost me $86...

She bout to drop me off...and she like "take me upstairs ".

I'm nervous as fukk like...okay but we gotta do it with the lights off...

Brehs she took me upstairs and fukked my soul out...I somehow convinced her to take a shower in the dark too

Anyways she bout to leave...she says...hey can I ask you something? I'm like yeah? ()

"It kinda stinks like fish in here...is that me? You can tell me if it is?"

I LEFT THE GOD DAMN FISH ON THE COUNTER FOR LIKE 10 HOURS BREHS. MY WHOLE fukkING HOUSE STINKS...

FOR THE FINALE...as she's leaving...she asks me if I would ride to the store with her.

She stops at the Walgreens by the tollway...I'm confused...she grabs my hand...

"Do you think you could go in and buy me a plan B? I'm kind of embarassed."

At that point I had never bought a plan B...I'm like yeah sure...

That shyt was $39.99 brehs. I spent one third of my net worth on a fukking plan B. Combined with the dinner...the total cost of the night was...

$129. I could have just paid the fukking light bill...

*mic drop*

 

[El Coupeacabra]

**RESERVED FOR FUTURE LONG ASS STORY I DON'T FEEL LIKE TYPING RIGHT NOW**

 

[El Coupeacabra]

Once had a check that was $112...


But I don't like to think about that

Lmao I been there breh...payday don't even matter you like when you check that account

 

[SmokyQuartz]

When i came out the womb i ain't had shyt. Got paid the next day tho

 

[flea]

When I was an unemployed scumbag my dinner would be four tall cans of natural ice I would buy with assorted change I found around the crib and down them with xanax so it'd feel like I drank 20 beers. The xanax I would steal from my uncle I lived next to . After months of frying my brain with that shyt I started hallucinating and seeing shyt that wasn't there.

 

[Boujee Bonita Braxton]

Back in 2011 I used to pay my Georgia Power Bill with checks from a closed account just so I could have 3 extra business days to come up with the money.

I'm glad those days are over.

 

[HabitualChiller]

I only have 25 cents to my name

 

[Tombstone]

When I was a broke youngin shyt was bad, not broke anymore we doin big thangs outchea now, I have a list of broke stories since I was young.

-Eating straight up bread as lunch/dinner
-Doing illegal shyt at 9-10 years old so I can bring bread to my crib and help my mom.
-Getting evicted 4-5 times was the WOAT feeling, I promised myself I would never be broke as a man
-17 bein homeless when I left my moms crib and havin to sell pills to get a motel to make sure I can graduate HS cuz I was alread failing with missed days to hustle, my grandma saved me and got an apartment so I can live with her.

- Moms sent me back to NY cuz of some personal drama and she couldnt deal with me.. to live in Red Hook Pjs in BK. 4-5 of us living in a project apartment 1 bed room, sleepin on the floor with roaches..ended up stickin up cacs/dealers for money.
Got a lot more but Ill let this sit for now. shyt was really bad as a youngin

 

[peppe]

When i was getting weekly payments on this new job my loan would get deducted the 8 and i got paid on the 9th.

It was a low paying job and every month there was one week were i would work for free. 8th - loan 9th payday - loan. 0€ left. I quit that low paying job 1 month later

 

[Donald Trumps Twitter]

We used to eat toast with butter and sugar for dinner when i was a kid.


Like literally everyday


I was conditioned early because of it :

Dollar menu items only, no more than $3 worth


I still do this shyt somedays


Let me get 4 tacos and a chicken sandwich


Let me get two mcchickens


Can i have some fries ma?
NO! We all sharing one value fry


Ok

 

[DJSmooth]

You ain't ever been dead broke if you've never went to sleep for dinner to save money

 

[Imhotep2]

Transferred $1 from my savings account to my checking account so I would have enough money to buy ramen noodles

Walked to 5 different laundromats looking for change on the ground so I can have $5 change emergency food fund in my pocket

Spent that $5 change on a lottery ticket hoping I'd win but end up being more broke than I was before and go to sleep hungry

2014 was the worst year of my life breh
Glad those times are over and now I'm eating good

Never again!

 

[Fun Sized Psycho]

I only have 25 cents to my name

Maybe if you were holding a dentist's nuts you'd have a lot more than $.25