johntheblackjew
Banned
Inb4 im a boss making 1 million a day and only fukk models..
Im talking to my average dudes with the average job for a second.
Havin to constantly worry about if you're kissing the right ass, making the right impression, dancing the dance that ensures you get that nextcheck in 2 week or a month...do I have enough money or resource somewhere to hold me over if they decide not to give me that check anymore?... is just fukking tiring. And I have been doing this for a relatively short time too. I'm sitting here thinking and imagining that this game has to go on for 40 plus years of my life. THIS shyt can't be life.
Now...see, don't get me wrong...I have no issue with the working thing..actually doing work...but so much of the working itself has to do with all the peripheral issues that have nothing to do with your ability to actually do the work itself..that's the thing that has me pulling my hair trying to imagine playing it for 40 years of my life.
I am someone that has always been a quiet person..always. the thing I'm realising though is that when you're quiet(in my experience especially black and quiet in a white workplace), people perceive you as being arrogant or thinking you're better than everyone else.
So this job that I'm at...I go out of my way to engage with people but ultimately I default to my natural state. I get that vibe from my coworkers that I'm just not a "team player" because Im not always on that constant chit chattering and bullshyting to pass time that a lot of others do. when it comes to my work, I do a fantastic job..never had a mistake or issue.
Now..the job that I do is sufficiently covered by one person every shift...all of a sudden, I find out that they hired a temp and will be training them for that position(they've nevery done that before). it may be completely unrelated to anything..but now I'm sitting here worrying and stressing about if I have enough savings to cover me for a year incase in comes down to it. I just moved to a new place..how will that work out if I'm out of a job.
This constant paranoia seems to be the new normal of you are in that position and that environment.
Im talking to my average dudes with the average job for a second.
Havin to constantly worry about if you're kissing the right ass, making the right impression, dancing the dance that ensures you get that nextcheck in 2 week or a month...do I have enough money or resource somewhere to hold me over if they decide not to give me that check anymore?... is just fukking tiring. And I have been doing this for a relatively short time too. I'm sitting here thinking and imagining that this game has to go on for 40 plus years of my life. THIS shyt can't be life.
Now...see, don't get me wrong...I have no issue with the working thing..actually doing work...but so much of the working itself has to do with all the peripheral issues that have nothing to do with your ability to actually do the work itself..that's the thing that has me pulling my hair trying to imagine playing it for 40 years of my life.
I am someone that has always been a quiet person..always. the thing I'm realising though is that when you're quiet(in my experience especially black and quiet in a white workplace), people perceive you as being arrogant or thinking you're better than everyone else.
So this job that I'm at...I go out of my way to engage with people but ultimately I default to my natural state. I get that vibe from my coworkers that I'm just not a "team player" because Im not always on that constant chit chattering and bullshyting to pass time that a lot of others do. when it comes to my work, I do a fantastic job..never had a mistake or issue.
Now..the job that I do is sufficiently covered by one person every shift...all of a sudden, I find out that they hired a temp and will be training them for that position(they've nevery done that before). it may be completely unrelated to anything..but now I'm sitting here worrying and stressing about if I have enough savings to cover me for a year incase in comes down to it. I just moved to a new place..how will that work out if I'm out of a job.
This constant paranoia seems to be the new normal of you are in that position and that environment.
no it's not, you obviously don't ready anything outside status updates & tweets