Well, I think most people would say what you said, you are not declaring anything special.When I say go to hell for, I mean there's nothing, nowhere, no one, I'll not face for my child.
If it were real and came to issue, if a devil gave me the choice of my child burn in hell or myself, I'd let my child walk and burn for them.
So let's pretend hell exists. But if he'll exists, then the rules of God and the existence of Satan exists. Can't have one without the other.
If Hell, God and Satan exist, then the only way to get to hell would be to die while not believing in Christ as your Lord. There is no options, ultimatums or trades - each person gets individually judged.
So in your hypothetical world, you will never get the option to have a conversation with Satan about who is going where.
This entire thread makes no sense brother.