Looks like you dealing with loss and let that emotion effect your other relationships.
I don’t know you and shortys real situation, but my advice from what I see is to sit down and have a real convo with her after you finish grieving your loved one.
I don't know the whole situation but I get the feeling that she can be real smothering at times especially the "I should see you every time you are off".
There was a brehette I was talking to during the spring who wanted to spend the night at my place 5 out of 7 nights a week. And this was after 3 weeks of talking. I couldn't handle that type of smothering either.
You needed some space especially with what went down with your cousin (RIP)
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