JayBaldacci
All Star
Slim Fantom presents: YOUR FAVORITE RAPPER SUCKS - Wu-Tang Corp. - Official Site of the Wu-Tang Clan
Ghostface Killah
Ah. Mr. Starks came first, excellent, I was thinking of him while creating the thread. Ghost sucks because he's an act. And an extremely ill-defined act at that. Who is Ghostface Killah? Is he that misogynist a$$hole who fukked your friend, yeah you stank hoe? Is he that soft and tender wimp who was slobbering at sight of her putting her cigarette in her mouth - and is unable to even get her number? Is he that maniacal killer who makes you rock those false joints for fukking with his man? Is he that sobbing prayer who wants to be sacrificed so that his kids can be in paradise? Or is he just that dude that's always telling something very jovially, but nobody ever understands him?
Wait, the best part comes straight up. He's inclined to talk tough 'bout meeting this OG's and making coke deals and whatever - yet he raps all that in a voice of a 12-year old girl drowning in her own tears. I mean, how can you take seriously a man who apparently walks around breaking jaws and still sounds like he grew up without testicles? And if that wasn't enough, he concluded that he must talk slang-heavily to be a mafioso, but po' boy doesn't know any slang words, so he must INVENT THEM. He gots to make up what he thinks streets sound like. Yeah. A male girl who raps his tough street fantasies. He should be white.
Oh yeah, and he's the man of the 70's, I shouldn't forget that. He just loves Temptations and Marvin Gaye and Aretha Franklin (sounding like earless version of the latter) so much that he just has to make a R&B album. Talking about hardcore hip-hop and loyalty to the game. He doesn't even like rap - how can he not suck?
Rakim
What makes Rakim such a great MC? Does he leave you wordless with his vividly told and intense stories? Not quite. Is he capable to make your jaw drop with displays of honesty and soul? Even less, bruh. Does he create muy controversia with smart and on point political statements that make you think whether you like it or not? Uh...
So what's left? Bragging about the mic? Oh well... I could even stomach it, if he could at least prevent you from falling asleep with that. He physically can't put any stress on words, his throat is made in such way that's impossible for him to ever raise his voice. He's actually unable to switch his flow up. He just goes on 'n' on for days and days with that limp delivery. I mean, his whole career sounds like smoothened-out "A Milli".
You want further proof? He OWES his career to Eric B. The point is, Rakim never fell off. But while Eric B. was able to find dope ghostproducers in an era when you could actually make original compositions from loads of samples, propelling Rakim to stardom, just look what happened when laws forced production to be dumbed-down. I repeat, Rakim didn't change a bit during that period.
Oh yeah, also a problem - he didn't change a bit. Trying to sell same shyt that was in twenty years ago.
Jay-Z
Ooh, S. Carter, the swaggering ultra-rich cocky motherfukker everyone's jockin'. Well, let's scrape under that surface and what do we find? A po' thick-lipped small black dude with inferiority complex so huge it can't even be cured.
He's so insecure about his lyrics that he constantly has to bite other rappers lyrics to be sure he has at least one line worth the listener's while. He's so insecure about his albums that he must put out one every year - 'cause he's eaten inside by the doubt that if he waited more than 12 months, listeners could as well as forget he exists. He's so insecure about his appearance that he constanly needs to repeat how cocky he is just to convince himself that he isn't a total weenie. He's so insecure about his sound that he always has to run with whichever rapper or producer is hot at the moment. He's so insecure about his clique that he's lately actually avoiding to be seen with them, 'cause he can't sleep thinking if they suit him or not.
And he got only in one real beef during his whole career, where this inferiority complex made him flail. Sorry, in all of his disses he came more like Nas fanboy than a person who wants to get at him. All of his disses came in a matter of weeks after Nas shots came, while Nas even let it all bubble for months before coming out. And he was literally left WORDLESS with Ether, he broke down on radio when asked about it. And he failed even at fukking Nas baby mama.
Notorious B.I.G.
Another B.I.G. act. The biggie bad flosser, mafia don Frank Blizzard, moves his pinky and you're dead, fukkin girls all around. Yeah.
And then you get to know him and you realize that he was a dude who never overcame his Edip's complex, being mama's huge boy at age of 25. Not to even mention that he was an incredibly smart dumbass, a straight A kid (that's gangsta) who fukked it all up for standing up on the corner and being a small-time dealer. Maybe he was autistic or something, because at age of 22 he showed intellectual level of a fresh teen, frustrated because of his fatness (asthmatic, goddamn), depressed rebel without a cause with suicidal thoughts.
But, okay, he at least had balls to say how it is on his first album, but until second he just became another in the line of mediocre bling rappers utterly bored with their life. Not to mention that somewhere in the process he almost completely lost his ability to rap in legit sentences.
When it comes to sex - c'mon, who was he fooling? Someone that fat can't fukk at all, I mean how can anyone get to his dikk through those hundreds of pounds of jelly fat? Noticed how every fat rapper loves to brag about his sexual escapades? There's a very simple reason: they don't get any. And, because Biggie was obviously still in puberty, he had to make up all those stories with shytting and Manila trilla to impress his classmates. So, let's sum up why Biggie sucked: because he was a depressed fat fukked-up lying lifetime adolescent mama's boy. Content?
Big Punisher
Yes, I have a problem with that fat ass because his breath control makes me puke. I know that it's hard to breathe through half-a-tonne of grease (how can someone allow himself to become THAT fat?), but goddamn, that shyt sounds like blowing a straw into a bowl of half-melted butter.
And that's the only interesting thing I can say about him. For real, I ain't now telling bullshyt, I never got why is he so awesome. He was a typical product of Diddy-pop era, half time acting a murderin' thug, half time a flossin' overweight lover. I don't like repeating myself, but come on, how can anyone believe he had any kind of sex? I bet he had so much fat around his dikk it wasn't even visible. When erected.
Nas
There's been so much said about Nas these days on this forum that I don't know what can I say about him anyway. Well, let's switch the script a bit and talk about his flaws, not his sins.
For starters, he completely deserves comparison with Rakim, as he always raps with the same flow - no matter what beat he's on. But he's even worse, Rakim can't switch it up; Nas can, he proved it already on "One Mic." But he sticks with that played-out declamatory spitting because it's easy, and he's such a great man and lyricist he doesn't need to care how to present himself, lazy motherfukker.
Then, he absolutely loves the smell of his own dikk. Nas is actually Peter Sellers, didn't you know that? He can be whatever you want, he can be a Colombian mafioso, or street prophet, or mainstreamish version of Killah Priest, or a revolutionary who gets old, all while keeping his swaggerin' and flossin'. And what's even worse, he's lame and unconvincing in most of these attempts, because you FEEL he's trying so hard not to be him. And I simply don't understand why, if he kept his career in Illmatic vibe he'd be at least equally successful, if not more, and everyone would love him.
I can't escape this feeling that Nas is actually a chickenshyt, a scared-of-life yes-man, who avoids standing for himself and rather listens to whatever whoever says to him, MC Serch, Steve the Commissioner, Destiny, Jigger, whoever. He's just a chicken who tries to squash all beef and even kept his mouth shut when Pete Rock fukked his girlfriend, or Pac checked him in the park back in '96. "I'ma put out a diss track, now if you don't wanna problems just keep your mouf shut then and then maybe we chill." Do you say something like that to someone you actually consider a man?
Ghostface Killah
Ah. Mr. Starks came first, excellent, I was thinking of him while creating the thread. Ghost sucks because he's an act. And an extremely ill-defined act at that. Who is Ghostface Killah? Is he that misogynist a$$hole who fukked your friend, yeah you stank hoe? Is he that soft and tender wimp who was slobbering at sight of her putting her cigarette in her mouth - and is unable to even get her number? Is he that maniacal killer who makes you rock those false joints for fukking with his man? Is he that sobbing prayer who wants to be sacrificed so that his kids can be in paradise? Or is he just that dude that's always telling something very jovially, but nobody ever understands him?
Wait, the best part comes straight up. He's inclined to talk tough 'bout meeting this OG's and making coke deals and whatever - yet he raps all that in a voice of a 12-year old girl drowning in her own tears. I mean, how can you take seriously a man who apparently walks around breaking jaws and still sounds like he grew up without testicles? And if that wasn't enough, he concluded that he must talk slang-heavily to be a mafioso, but po' boy doesn't know any slang words, so he must INVENT THEM. He gots to make up what he thinks streets sound like. Yeah. A male girl who raps his tough street fantasies. He should be white.
Oh yeah, and he's the man of the 70's, I shouldn't forget that. He just loves Temptations and Marvin Gaye and Aretha Franklin (sounding like earless version of the latter) so much that he just has to make a R&B album. Talking about hardcore hip-hop and loyalty to the game. He doesn't even like rap - how can he not suck?
Rakim
What makes Rakim such a great MC? Does he leave you wordless with his vividly told and intense stories? Not quite. Is he capable to make your jaw drop with displays of honesty and soul? Even less, bruh. Does he create muy controversia with smart and on point political statements that make you think whether you like it or not? Uh...
So what's left? Bragging about the mic? Oh well... I could even stomach it, if he could at least prevent you from falling asleep with that. He physically can't put any stress on words, his throat is made in such way that's impossible for him to ever raise his voice. He's actually unable to switch his flow up. He just goes on 'n' on for days and days with that limp delivery. I mean, his whole career sounds like smoothened-out "A Milli".
You want further proof? He OWES his career to Eric B. The point is, Rakim never fell off. But while Eric B. was able to find dope ghostproducers in an era when you could actually make original compositions from loads of samples, propelling Rakim to stardom, just look what happened when laws forced production to be dumbed-down. I repeat, Rakim didn't change a bit during that period.
Oh yeah, also a problem - he didn't change a bit. Trying to sell same shyt that was in twenty years ago.
Jay-Z
Ooh, S. Carter, the swaggering ultra-rich cocky motherfukker everyone's jockin'. Well, let's scrape under that surface and what do we find? A po' thick-lipped small black dude with inferiority complex so huge it can't even be cured.
He's so insecure about his lyrics that he constantly has to bite other rappers lyrics to be sure he has at least one line worth the listener's while. He's so insecure about his albums that he must put out one every year - 'cause he's eaten inside by the doubt that if he waited more than 12 months, listeners could as well as forget he exists. He's so insecure about his appearance that he constanly needs to repeat how cocky he is just to convince himself that he isn't a total weenie. He's so insecure about his sound that he always has to run with whichever rapper or producer is hot at the moment. He's so insecure about his clique that he's lately actually avoiding to be seen with them, 'cause he can't sleep thinking if they suit him or not.
And he got only in one real beef during his whole career, where this inferiority complex made him flail. Sorry, in all of his disses he came more like Nas fanboy than a person who wants to get at him. All of his disses came in a matter of weeks after Nas shots came, while Nas even let it all bubble for months before coming out. And he was literally left WORDLESS with Ether, he broke down on radio when asked about it. And he failed even at fukking Nas baby mama.
Notorious B.I.G.
Another B.I.G. act. The biggie bad flosser, mafia don Frank Blizzard, moves his pinky and you're dead, fukkin girls all around. Yeah.
And then you get to know him and you realize that he was a dude who never overcame his Edip's complex, being mama's huge boy at age of 25. Not to even mention that he was an incredibly smart dumbass, a straight A kid (that's gangsta) who fukked it all up for standing up on the corner and being a small-time dealer. Maybe he was autistic or something, because at age of 22 he showed intellectual level of a fresh teen, frustrated because of his fatness (asthmatic, goddamn), depressed rebel without a cause with suicidal thoughts.
But, okay, he at least had balls to say how it is on his first album, but until second he just became another in the line of mediocre bling rappers utterly bored with their life. Not to mention that somewhere in the process he almost completely lost his ability to rap in legit sentences.
When it comes to sex - c'mon, who was he fooling? Someone that fat can't fukk at all, I mean how can anyone get to his dikk through those hundreds of pounds of jelly fat? Noticed how every fat rapper loves to brag about his sexual escapades? There's a very simple reason: they don't get any. And, because Biggie was obviously still in puberty, he had to make up all those stories with shytting and Manila trilla to impress his classmates. So, let's sum up why Biggie sucked: because he was a depressed fat fukked-up lying lifetime adolescent mama's boy. Content?
Big Punisher
Yes, I have a problem with that fat ass because his breath control makes me puke. I know that it's hard to breathe through half-a-tonne of grease (how can someone allow himself to become THAT fat?), but goddamn, that shyt sounds like blowing a straw into a bowl of half-melted butter.
And that's the only interesting thing I can say about him. For real, I ain't now telling bullshyt, I never got why is he so awesome. He was a typical product of Diddy-pop era, half time acting a murderin' thug, half time a flossin' overweight lover. I don't like repeating myself, but come on, how can anyone believe he had any kind of sex? I bet he had so much fat around his dikk it wasn't even visible. When erected.
Nas
There's been so much said about Nas these days on this forum that I don't know what can I say about him anyway. Well, let's switch the script a bit and talk about his flaws, not his sins.
For starters, he completely deserves comparison with Rakim, as he always raps with the same flow - no matter what beat he's on. But he's even worse, Rakim can't switch it up; Nas can, he proved it already on "One Mic." But he sticks with that played-out declamatory spitting because it's easy, and he's such a great man and lyricist he doesn't need to care how to present himself, lazy motherfukker.
Then, he absolutely loves the smell of his own dikk. Nas is actually Peter Sellers, didn't you know that? He can be whatever you want, he can be a Colombian mafioso, or street prophet, or mainstreamish version of Killah Priest, or a revolutionary who gets old, all while keeping his swaggerin' and flossin'. And what's even worse, he's lame and unconvincing in most of these attempts, because you FEEL he's trying so hard not to be him. And I simply don't understand why, if he kept his career in Illmatic vibe he'd be at least equally successful, if not more, and everyone would love him.
I can't escape this feeling that Nas is actually a chickenshyt, a scared-of-life yes-man, who avoids standing for himself and rather listens to whatever whoever says to him, MC Serch, Steve the Commissioner, Destiny, Jigger, whoever. He's just a chicken who tries to squash all beef and even kept his mouth shut when Pete Rock fukked his girlfriend, or Pac checked him in the park back in '96. "I'ma put out a diss track, now if you don't wanna problems just keep your mouf shut then and then maybe we chill." Do you say something like that to someone you actually consider a man?
for a minute...what happened to it?
dude use to get hoed and a bit racist from me just lurking that site
