This is why I tell women to wait to have kids make sure it’s actually something you want to do. Society tries to tell women they have to have kids by a certain age or that they absolutely have to have kids or they’re failures/worthless/something wrong with them etc but you gotta ignore it because those will be the same people ridiculing you when you’re crying out for help. That PPD is no joke, it can last for years, especially if you have children back to back. I had a LOT of help after having my children and I went through ppd after having them so I can only imagine what it’s like doing it alone.