WOULD YOU WANT TO KNOW....

[Boujee Bonita Braxton]

Ahead of time if a girl you were dealing with seriously had a crazy ex boyfriend?

I ask because for a period a few years ago while me and my husband were broken up I started dating this guy. He seemed really nice and sweet at first. He courted me, nice long talks, he seemed all in and then not even a week after us first having sex dude's crazy came out. He started talking about our future and us trying to find a house together. He was showing up at my house and job unannounced, sitting outside hours after he was supposed to be leaving, calling me nonstop, sending threatening text messages, and just plain being creepy. Then I finally caught a break when he got arrested on a parole violation (he didn't even tell me he'd been in prison). I had my mom look him up seeing as though she's a paralegal and come to find out he had a longggg record that included kidnapping, aggravated assault.

Needless to say I cut all contact with dude. He got out and started "stalking" me again and I finally had to get my son's father (my husband now) involved. He FINALLY left me alone and I've had peace for the last 2 years. (I've seen him in public but he just stares and I could tell it was just a coincidence).

So say you were in that situatuon....would you want to know? Would you stick around for her safety? Or would you dip for your own?

 

[At30wecashout]

Yea. Past is not the fukking past. She may have demons that can come back to haunt our thing.
Your situation could have had that nut waiting outside of your kids school at some point

Letting me know gives me a cyanide pill to kill interactions when shyt gets too spooky, rather than falling into the "love concurs all" trap. Besides, what if old dude used to beat on you or cheat on your or something, and my relatively calm demeanor unnerves you because you are waiting for my switch to flip? Suddenly you are doing things to the relationship and I have no earthly idea why.

These things help rule out potential minefields, cause If im not already seeing wedding bells, it probably isnt anything to cut communication and start off with someone with far less "risk".

 

[Tapp]

Last thing I need is a ngga kidnapping my son on some action movie shyt cause he got dumped 8 years ago

 

[Boujee Bonita Braxton]

Yea. Past is not the fukking past. She may have demons that can come back to haunt our thing.
Your situation could have had that nut waiting outside of your kids school at some point

Letting me know gives me a cyanide pill to kill interactions when shyt gets too spooky, rather than falling into the "love concurs all" trap. Besides, what if old dude used to beat on you or cheat on your or something, and my relatively calm demeanor unnerves you because you are waiting for my switch to flip? Suddenly you are doing things to the relationship and I have no earthly idea why.

These things help rule out potential minefields, cause If im not already seeing wedding bells, it probably isnt anything to cut communication and start off with someone with far less "risk".

Okay. Yeah that's completely understandable.

 

[At30wecashout]

Last thing I need is a ngga kidnapping my son on some action movie shyt cause he got dumped 8 years ago

Be out here like a black Harrison Ford kicking terrorist from airplanes and shyt yelling "Give me back my family!"

Okay. Yeah that's completely understandable.

Yea, pretty much the same reason I would have no problem disclosing that I have never had a proper relationship or something similar. You might be totally geeked about a particular passion, or enjoy more time than im giving you, and I don't know how to act nor communicate because I've never had to. You might think im just a selfish a$$hole othewise, when really I'm just new to this. Same if I smothered you and have to be repeatedly reminded of boundaries. These things matter, and help the navigation go by smoother.

 

[BezO]

So say you were in that situatuon....would you want to know? Would you stick around for her safety? Or would you dip for your own?

That needs to be handled prior to gettin' involved with someone else. No offense, but that shows a lack of responsibility and lack of concern for new suitors. Not someone I'd want to be involved with.

 

[Boujee Bonita Braxton]

That needs to be handled prior to gettin' involved with someone else. No offense, but that shows a lack of responsibility and lack of concern for new suitors. Not someone I'd want to be involved with.

Well what if she didn't tell you and the two of you got in deep like you were in love with this woman and then out of the blue she brings this guy up because he's recently started bothering her again?

 

[BezO]

Well what if she didn't tell you and the two of you got in deep like you were in love with this woman and then out of the blue she brings this guy up because he's recently started bothering her again?

I need more info...

How deep are we?

She handled it appropriately and dude started up again?

She thought dude stopped and let it ride?

Either way, some things need to be disclosed no matter what for me not to skate. Kids, diseases, dangerous exes, divorce, finance issues... basically anything that could affect me. Lack of responsibility & concern show up in many ways. Odds are she'd reveal her true character prior to me fallin' in love like that.