KOBE VS SHAQ: INTERESTING LAKERS EXCERPTS FROM "MADMEN'S BALL" BY MARK HEISLER

[Sccit]

You don't even know what a ball hog is,there's a reason why NOBODY wants to play with him. Shut up

You're right about Dwight bein a nobody, but what the fucc did you just fukking say, you lil biitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, wit over 300 confirmed kills. Im trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. Your biitchass is nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fucc out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fuccin words. You think you can get away with saying that shyt to me over the Internet? Think again, mufucca. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, fagboy. The storm that wipes out the pathetic lil thing you call your life. You fuccin dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you lil shyt. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your biitchass tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shiit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You fuccin dead, kiddo.

 

[Originalgangsta317]

You're right about Dwight bein a nobody, but what the fucc did you just fukking say, you lil biitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, wit over 300 confirmed kills. Im trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. Your biitchass is nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fucc out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fuccin words. You think you can get away with saying that shyt to me over the Internet? Think again, mufucca. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, fagboy. The storm that wipes out the pathetic lil thing you call your life. You fuccin dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you lil shyt. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your biitchass tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shiit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You fuccin dead, kiddo.

fukk you bytch,Im in Michigan now speed this process up and lets get busy

 

[Bilz]

UNFORTUNATELY, HE WASN'T WILLIN TO ACCEPT THAT ROLE AND DEMANDED A 30 MILLION DOLLAR EXTENSION WHEN IT WAS ALREADY EVIDENT THAT HE WAS FALLIN OFF.
.

Kobe learned a lot from Shaq.

 

[Sccit]

fukk you bytch,Im in Michigan now speed this process up and lets get busy

I don’t give a fucc who you are or where ya live. now you done did it. you can count on me to be there to bring your fuccin life to a hellish end. I’ll put you in so much mufuccin pain that it’ll make Jesus being nailed to a cross in the desert look like a fuccin back massage on a tropical island. I don’t give a fucc how many reps you have or how tough you are IRL, how well you can fight, or how many fuccin guns you own to protect yaself. I’ll fuccin show up at ya house when you aint home. I’ll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the water running, open ya fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. You goin to start stressing the fucc out, your blood pressure will triple, and you’ll have a fukkinc heart attack. You’ll go to the hospital for a heart operation, and the last thing you’ll see when you’re being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed like a doctor. When you wake up after being operated on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You’ll recover fully from ya lil heart surgery. And when you walk out the front door of the hospital to go home I’ll run you over with my fuccing impala out of no where and kill you. I just want you to know how easily I could fuccing destroy your pathetic excuse of a life, but how I’d rather go to a great fuccin length to make sure ya last remaining days are spent in a living, breathing mufuccin hell. It’s too late to save yourself, but don’t bother committing suicide either… I’ll fuccing resuscitate you and kill you again myself you biitch-faced fagot. Welcome to hell hoe, population: you

 

[Originalgangsta317]

I don’t give a fucc who you are or where ya live. now you done did it. you can count on me to be there to bring your fuccin life to a hellish end. I’ll put you in so much mufuccin pain that it’ll make Jesus being nailed to a cross in the desert look like a fuccin back massage on a tropical island. I don’t give a fucc how many reps you have or how tough you are IRL, how well you can fight, or how many fuccin guns you own to protect yaself. I’ll fuccin show up at ya house when you aint home. I’ll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the water running, open ya fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. You goin to start stressing the fucc out, your blood pressure will triple, and you’ll have a fukkinc heart attack. You’ll go to the hospital for a heart operation, and the last thing you’ll see when you’re being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed like a doctor. When you wake up after being operated on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You’ll recover fully from ya lil heart surgery. And when you walk out the front door of the hospital to go home I’ll run you over with my fuccing impala out of no where and kill you. I just want you to know how easily I could fuccing destroy your pathetic excuse of a life, but how I’d rather go to a great fuccin length to make sure ya last remaining days are spent in a living, breathing mufuccin hell. It’s too late to save yourself, but don’t bother committing suicide either… I’ll fuccing resuscitate you and kill you again myself you biitch-faced fagot. Welcome to hell hoe, population: you

Somebody get this guy a trophy,this bytch dun won internet gangsta of the decade

 

[Renkz]

Now, O'Neals problem became Jackson. O'Neal had accepted Jackson's jibes at first, calling Jackson, "my white father," but that was when O'Neal was still in the 325-pound range. Now he was coming in heavier every fall and taking half the season to play himself into shape.
At the end of the 2001 season, he had vowed to come back at his rookie weight, under 300, as a lean, mean rebounding machine. Instead, he spent the summer tending to foot injuries and came back closer to 400. Bill Walton noted, "Shaq is a virtual house. If Charles Barkley can get on a scale on national TV, why can't he?"
Replied O'Neal "I'll do that when Bill Walton takes his toupee off." When he was told Walton didn't wear one, O'Neal tried, "look, doesn't matter how much you weigh when you can play....How many rings did Bill Walton get anyway?"
The answer was two in the NBA and three in the NCAA. "Bill's got two, too?" said O'Neal. "Oh, I didn't know that."

Shaq tried to throw shots at Bill and failed

 

[NkrumahWasRight Is Wrong]

now shaq is an under-achiever that didnt age gracefully?

how many centers "age gracefully"? especially those even close to his size?

 

[MercuryHayes]

Then the Pistons came and ended a dynasty :wows:

 

[KOBE]

some shyt in there is funny, but if you're a lakers fan yall gotta stop harping on shaq as if he's some fukking villain. he helped us win 3 rings, and by helped i mean he led the team, not kobe, so lets forget about this shyt form over a decade ago and appreciate the fact we got a dynasty out of it. could it have been more? sure, but it was still 3 titles and four final appearances, hardly something to complain about.

 

[Sccit]

now shaq is an under-achiever that didnt age gracefully?

how many centers "age gracefully"? especially those even close to his size?

THATS NOT THE POINT. AGING GRACEFULLY MEANING KNOWING WHEN IT'S YOUR TIME TO FALL BACK AND LET THE OFFENSE RUN THROUGH PLAYERS WHO CLEARLY GOT THEIR ARROW POINTING UP, WHILE YOURS IS CLEARLY POINTING DOWN.....LIKE KAREEM DID WITH MAGIC. SHAQ'S EGO WOULDN'T ALLOW FOR THAT, WHICH ULTIMATELY COST HIM A FEW RINGS.

 

[#StarkSet]

God dam. Kobe murdered him on that quote about it being shaqs team

 

[Sccit]

some shyt in there is funny, but if you're a lakers fan yall gotta stop harping on shaq as if he's some fukking villain. he helped us win 3 rings, and by helped i mean he led the team, not kobe, so lets forget about this shyt form over a decade ago and appreciate the fact we got a dynasty out of it. could it have been more? sure, but it was still 3 titles and four final appearances, hardly something to complain about.

TRUE, BUT THE GRUDGE IS OVER THIS.....WHEN IT WAS HIS TURN TO FALL BACK AND LET THE OFFENSE RUN THROUGH KOBE, HE COULDNT BRING HIMSELF TO DO IT. AND BECAUSE OF THAT, WE HAD A DYNASTY CUT SHORT......INSTEAD OF DOMINATING THE ENTIRES 00'S, LIKE THE SHOWTIME LAKERS DID THE 80'S, WE GOT 2000-2002, WHICH WAS GREAT, BUT COULDA BEEN A WHOLE LOT GREATER....SO DO I APPRECIATE SHAQ FOR WHAT HE BROUGHT TO THE PURPLE AND GOLD? OF COURSE. AM I UPSET THAT HE COULDA DONE A LOT MORE HAD HE PUT HIS INFLATED EGO ASIDE? NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.

 

[livindajetlife]

You're right about Dwight bein a nobody, but what the fucc did you just fukking say, you lil biitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, wit over 300 confirmed kills. Im trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. Your biitchass is nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fucc out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fuccin words. You think you can get away with saying that shyt to me over the Internet? Think again, mufucca. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, fagboy. The storm that wipes out the pathetic lil thing you call your life. You fuccin dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you lil shyt. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your biitchass tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shiit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You fuccin dead, kiddo.

I don’t give a fucc who you are or where ya live. now you done did it. you can count on me to be there to bring your fuccin life to a hellish end. I’ll put you in so much mufuccin pain that it’ll make Jesus being nailed to a cross in the desert look like a fuccin back massage on a tropical island. I don’t give a fucc how many reps you have or how tough you are IRL, how well you can fight, or how many fuccin guns you own to protect yaself. I’ll fuccin show up at ya house when you aint home. I’ll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the water running, open ya fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. You goin to start stressing the fucc out, your blood pressure will triple, and you’ll have a fukkinc heart attack. You’ll go to the hospital for a heart operation, and the last thing you’ll see when you’re being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed like a doctor. When you wake up after being operated on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You’ll recover fully from ya lil heart surgery. And when you walk out the front door of the hospital to go home I’ll run you over with my fuccing impala out of no where and kill you. I just want you to know how easily I could fuccing destroy your pathetic excuse of a life, but how I’d rather go to a great fuccin length to make sure ya last remaining days are spent in a living, breathing mufuccin hell. It’s too late to save yourself, but don’t bother committing suicide either… I’ll fuccing resuscitate you and kill you again myself you biitch-faced fagot. Welcome to hell hoe, population: you

 

[Biscayne]

God dam. Kobe murdered him on that quote about it being shaqs team

One of the most eloquent quotes I've heard by an athlete.

 

[Originalgangsta317]

Dont laugh at that bytch,dont feed a troll