32, not married, no kids, life is on easy mode but starting to get scared

[Sccit]

GOIN OUT CHILDLESS IS SAD

ITS OUR OBLIGATION TO PROCREATE

BELIEVE THAT

 

[BaggerofTea]

I'm in the same boat and trying to settle down sometime in '22 inshallah

I currently trying to choose my 1 from 3 girls, they all have qualities that I love, I'm conflicted as hell but time does not stop for anyone
and they are also getting a little impatient as they want kids and a family

This waste time, ring a round a rosy with 3 women, 2 of which other more capable brehs could be dealing with is fukking up the game royally.


I couldnt even waste my time speaking to a female who had the audacity to play this game with 2 other women

 

[capblk]

Ultimately, it's up to you but don't wait around for everything to be perfect. No one knows what position they will be in financially and/or physically 6 months, a year etc. Only thing I can recommend based off my personal experience is to have your own place with enough space for a kid or two and reliable car. Best of luck!

 

[DreadBrown]

As much as it pains, I dont think I can do any better. 25, no kids, in shape, can cook,, traditional, great career. I can envision her raising my kids. On the flip side I am free, can focus on my career.
I dont envision her making my life miserable like some dudes here complain. I have met woman that you know being in the same house with them will have you come home miserable.

Sound like you got a keeper bro don’t let it slip away because you wanna play Peter Pan

32 is not young don’t waste any more time

 

[ExodusNirvana]

Yo

I might have posted this before, but I'm still tripping at how the other day I was at a friends BBQ for his daughter and when someone asked him when him and his wife were having "another" child

He said his wife wants a boy....but then he joked "But we waiting on this one [me] to have his first!"

I said nah I'm good...took me a while to get where I am now and I'm not even 100% where I want to be

And one of his mans...who had JUST talked about his stresses with his OWN wife...we was JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS 15 MINUTES AGO WHILE WE WERE SMOKING

And my man says "Oh so you're selfish"

Every time he has a get together, I take a good look at this mans friends and I think yo...you nikkas all fukked up...but you don't want to admit it, because then you'd be openly admitting you resent the life of your own child.

But you and I know the truth. I can see it on your face.

Like I can SEE how the stress of being a husband and father before they were supposed to be has destroyed them inside and out!

It's not for everyone...it's beautiful when it works.....I have a few examples of friends where (as far as I know) it is working.

But it's not for everyone

 

[Fletch]

Who wants to be 40 and just having kids? You'll be 61/62 when your child graduates from college. That's not the wave. You may not live long enough to see your grandchildren.

But why does it matter? That’s the question, if it’s important to you to see grand children then that’s fine, but not everyone has a goal of just having kids some people have career and life aspirations bigger than raising a child. There’s gotta be some reason behind it, not just oh well it’s how life goes get married, have kids, die. Most men think it’s a legacy thing, but regardless 3 generations from now you more than likely won’t be remembered. The only obligation any of us have I believe is to try and leave the world a little better than it was before us.

 

[Rell Lauren]

But why does it matter? That’s the question, if it’s important to you to see grand children then that’s fine, but not everyone has a goal of just having kids some people have career and life aspirations bigger than raising a child. There’s gotta be some reason behind it, not just oh well it’s how life goes get married, have kids, die. Most men think it’s a legacy thing, but regardless 3 generations from now you more than likely won’t be remembered. The only obligation any of us have I believe is to try and leave the world a little better than it was before us.

This has nothing to do with a legacy. I can die in my sleep tonight and nothing will stop because of it. Having kids old is the same excuse women use. They want to travel and have a career. Who said you can't do that with kids? Having children when you reach a certain age is selfish to me (man or woman).

 

[Jahbarri]

I see people all around me getting married and having kids here I am still grinding.

Not that I dont have any prospects. Got a 25 year who wants to settle down, have kids but ultimately I am afraid of responsibilities.

Note worth it kids are headaches . Adopt a teenager

 

[Ol’Otis]

At least knock a bih up. You gettin' old bruh. You don't wanna be droppin lil man off at pre-k when you're 40

Hell naw

 

[NaijaProdigy Redux]

Societal pressure is an awful reason to get married and have kids.

Enjoy your life until you're ready -- if you ever reach that point.

Being a grown man is about having your shyt in order and doing whatever you want -- not what society expects

 

[kej718]

Are you waiting for something specific to happen before you do all those things? You trying to save up first? Have things you want to get out the way?

You still got time if she is who you end up with. She is still young. My ex really wanted one. We broke up about a little more than a year ago, and she ended up having a kid with some other dude after me (they are not together).

Make sure it's what you really want and not something you are doing to make someone else happy. If you do decide to go further than have a conversation about what both you expections going forward.

 

[Diunx]

I'm on the same boat but on the contrary, see everyone dealing with their shytty ass kids and makes me thank the lord I'm still free of that shyt

 

[Fletch]

This has nothing to do with a legacy. I can die in my sleep tonight and nothing will stop because of it. Having kids old is the same excuse women use. They want to travel and have a career. Who said you can't do that with kids? Having children when you reach a certain age is selfish to me (man or woman).

Maybe if you’re talking 60+ having kids as a man, but traveling with kids sucks I know this from talking to my friends and my parents. You can’t go to nice places, no alone time, expensive af. It’s not how it used to be people are living longer and staying younger longer. Career, well you can either agree one parent gets to excel and be the breadwinner or you can neglect the kid. I’m not anti kids, but watching so many with them struggle one way or another means it’s no longer a decision that should be made because it’s traditional.

 

[Reptile]

Wtf? These are female ass thoughts. Lol at seeing others getting married and basing your life choices off that. You sound like a bird.

But on a real note cancel that 25 yr old. She has a ready made family. It only gets easier at your age. You can pick who you want, when you want. Just keep yourself in shape and maintain your worth.

Your gimmick is weak as fukk but I agree with this post.

 

[Deep_Black_Conscious]

Being a grown man is about having your shyt in order and doing whatever you want -- not what society expects