UPDATES: So I ain't even gon lie, y'all.
Going complete cold turkey on fap and porn had your boy out here on demon time. I was constantly horny, walking around with my dikk hard (pause) and as I travel a lot for work, sometimes I'm away for a period of time where She can't take care of me.
I was increasingly obsessing with the idea of cheating.
Crazy part is... even though I cut myself off from porn and fapping, after 3 to 4 weeks, my mind was becoming sex-obsessed on its own. Just by the power of my own imagination. It was an insane feeling. Imagine going from feeling like you barely have any libido, to literally feeling 15 again. That's how my body felt.
There's a power in that, I think. But I got weak, and rubbed one out last week to some nudes that this woman sent me. (I still haven't watched porn, which I'm happy about.) The only reason I broke is cause I set something up with a woman and she was talking like she changed her mind, and I felt like I just couldn't take it anymore.
I'm back on it again now, and since I rubbed one out last week, I feel like I leveled off and don't feel like I'm going crazy anymore... but now I'm discovering that part of me liked feeling like that.
I like walking around with my dikk on swole (pause) and constantly horny. It's better than walking around in a depressed haze feeling like I don't have any type of libido at all.
So I'm hoping to get back to that point again and this time I'm just going to let it run its course. If I need to get some strange, so be it.