Procrastination
Addicted to vengeance at any cost.
Always in my head.
Petty as fukk
Underestimate the amount of time I need to complete tasks on some “it’ll be a breeze...”
5 mins later
I can’t do formal public speaking. When I’m at a conference, I must have a white board b:c I talk and illustrate when I’m presenting.
People are impressed by this thinking it’s an intentional presentation gimmick not realizing it can be crippling. I don’t think in a linear fashion. I see an infinity of ideas instantly for each concept I’m discussing. That’s part of the reason why ya’ll get these long ass posts (with interjections like this one), and it’s also why I like writing. I have ample time to flesh out all the ideas and pathways.
So either I go a mile a minute when I’m speaking, or all the ideas get jumbled in my head and what comes out of my mouth is “DUUURRRRRRR”.
It only happens in formal academic settings. When I’m teaching, I’m very charismatic and comfortable b/c I’ve established my own culture in my classroom.
But when in a formal setting it’s hard for me to take all of what’s going on in my brain and distill it to something easily digestible for an audience. What’s worse (or hilariously better...sometimes) is I will default to slang or random pop culture references b/c it relaxes me.
Some colleagues of mine will be looking at me like

But then I break it down for them in their stuffy, stick up their asses, formal language and they are okay.
Which brings me to my next flaw-I hate rigid social conventions and do a lot to flout them. Playing the game is not something I’m good at.