Advice for future first time dads

[jaydawg08]

I'm new to the forum, but my GF recently got a positive pregnancy test.

Excited/nervous/stressed/elated all wrapped in one are basically my emotions. were an older couple (33 and 32) but have very stable careers and I'm wanting to get any advice from dads across the board on what you WISH you knew going into it.

Could be big or small don't really matter, just to get your opinions out there.

 

[DonB90]

Get custody rights asap

 

[Pseudonym]

Be supportive but not overbearing.

 

[Cereal_Bowl_Assassin]

Remember that you two are a team....

 

[Prince.Skeletor]

Congrats:

Tips:

1) How do you know if you are a good father? Firstly having a desire to be a good father is the first step!
2) Be there for your wife, if you are not there for her she will never forget it, if you are there for her she will also never forget it.
3) Buy a pregnancy book that shows the development of the baby daily, and read the book together in bed with yo woman.
4) Teach your kid the alphabet, all letters in the alphabet except for L G B T Q
5) Do not bring him ever to see the new Buzz Lightyear movie
6) Play some classical music around the house, starting at 7 months or so.
7) How to be a good father is directly proportional to your interest in being a good father, so if someone says buying a book about fatherhood is lame do not talk to that person about fatherhood again!
8) Try to not fight with yo woman in front of kid
9) Bring your kid to daycare ASAP, dont' wait until the baby is 1yr old, we put our kids in daycare from like 6 months or so. Getting used to other people is critical. I knew a mom that put her daugther in dayrcare when she was 2yrs old, the kid went into a panic mode when the mom left and was screaming hysterically. DO NOT WAIT!!

That is all for now

 

[TreySav]

Take a parenting class if you can

 

[homiedontplaydat]

90% of the job is just showing up. If u have the right intentions you'll figure it out.

Be prepared tho, you're about to meet the final form of your GF, u don't truly know a woman until u have kids with her

 

[85 East]

Be patient. It will be an emotional roller coaster for all three of you. Help out as much as you can. Embrace the change around you and within. You will change. Sleep as much as you can now. You won't get as much sleep once the baby is born. Trust your instincts. If you think something is wrong, go with your gut. Bond with your child as much as you can. Give your lady breaks when you can. Find a way to deal with the extreme up and downs she will have post delivery. They could last a while. Post partem hormones are real. Change diapers. The best way to get good quick is to just do it. Its nasty, and you will get stuff on you, the baby might even piss on you by accident once or twice, but learn how to do it. And again, be patient. Patience will help you out a lot.

 

[WesCrook]

Here's some sound preventive measuring advice:

Make sure your kid takes care his/her teeth.

Believe me, you do not want their teeth to be all rotten before they become adults. You will be coming out of your pockets to get them fixed, as most restoration procedures on that level will not be covered under your dental plan.

 

[moorfeus]

The best advice is get married and raise your child together under the same household. Do not create any other children outside of wedlock. NEVER take your family for granted!

 

[Mike809]

im not a dad , but you should sign them up for pre-k as soon as you can.
Also , read to them and maybe put on tv in other different languages since baby are like sponges.

 

[jdubnyce]

Welcome to the forum and congrats breh

1) Selflessness needs to be a priority. Your GF and baby need you more than ever. Depending on the birth (natural, c-section) your GF will need you

2) Teamwork - you guys will need to communicate, take shifts potentially. Ensure that you guys have an open communicative dialog

3) Time - depending on your work and financial situation, take as much time off from work as you can. It's cliche but you can't go back in time so take advantage of whatever you can. I remember just laying beside the bassinet, playpen just staring at my newborn kids peacefully sleeping. You can't ever go back to that.

4) Sleep - when you can, do it. When you can, train the baby to sleep (post 3-4 months). TRUST me. A baby that can't sleep on its own is torture for the parents.

5) Pictures/Videos - make it a daily thing. You can look back and think...wow. That's my seed. Memories. Trust me, even one a day.

6) Keep an eye out on the mom - post partum can rear it's head in different ways. Emotional, physical. It can manifest in different ways. Its a weird hormonal thing. My wife went through a mild case with our first and really didn't realize until a few years later when our son was born.

Oh and I'm assuming you and your gf are living together

 

[Jasonmask]

babies can process information lie 6 months in the pregnancy so start reading to them then

 

[datnigDASTARDLY]

You don't have to get married, but you must maintain a positive relationship and communicate with your girl/baby momma whatever. Yall need to get comfortable working together.

It sounds easy and yall could be straight already, but having a kid will flip a switch in you or her...things will become very clear very fast on what path you'll go down.

Your the father now, it's your job to be the rock. The women folk get all the credit, but the pappy...we really run this shyt behind the scenes breh

 

[profound]

there's nothing i wish i knew before i had kids

i stressed the first one and my bro told me ''keep it cool and learn as u go''

to think i was buying books and shyt

staying up at night, thinking, with the face

soak it up and learn as u go, my kids infancies was the greatest time of my life