The Definitions
Transgender is an umbrella term. It encompasses the entire spectrum of the "sex". All of the following people are transgendered... a crossdresser (CD) a transvestite (TV) a drag queen, a she-male, and a transsexual (TS). And there are people out there who simply refer to themselves as a “transgender” or TG. The term transgendered itself refers to anyone who shares a physical or mental need to align themselves with the opposite sex. So a CD, TV, she-male, drag queen, a TG, and TS are all transgendered. Now, let’s get to specifics, trust me, it is important to you, and to this writing.
A crossdresser is someone who simply wears the clothes of the opposite sex, almost exclusively for sexual gratification. A man who puts on just a pair of panties, or just pantyhose, is just as much a crossdresser as a man who wears an entire outfit, wig, make-up, and jewelry. The amount of clothing, or the type of clothing, does not separate him from the CD group... he is a crossdresser, period. And these people almost exclusively put on women’s clothing for sexual gratification only. They put on a silk slip, masturbate, and take it off... then they go on with their typically all male lives.
A transvestite is a little more serious about it. And actually, it would not be right to include all TV’s into one group.... there are sub groups. For instance, a TV is normally one who dresses completely.... entire business suits with bras, slips, stockings, garters, pantyhose, shoes, make-up, wig, jewelry, perfume, purse, accessories... the whole nine yards. But more importantly, what separates a TV from a CD is the fact that the TV does it more to complete their inner being than as a method of sexual gratification. No longer is it enough for this man to put on a garter and hose and masturbate, he must dress all the way. And no longer is it a sexual thrill alone, but more of a completion of who and what he is as a person ... he must express the feminine side of his personality.
So, he dresses all the way. And he practices walking, talking, dancing, sitting, standing, and graduates from masturbation to having sex as a woman. He begins to live a serious part of his life as a woman, chooses a name and begins to form a female persona... and most importantly, he begins to live two lives. And THAT is what separates a TV from a CD... a TV begins a new, female life. Almost always in private, limited to a few sexual playmates, usually other TV’s, and he sooner or later begins to venture into the real world as a woman. Here, we begin to break the TV into separate sub-categories.
A typical TV is quite closeted. He has a separate and unique side to his personality, that is certain, but he is deep in the closet still. He may have a few friends, or a few select sex partners, but he is, for the most part, very, very closeted. Then there are the ones taking the next step, steps towards becoming something resembling a true transsexual though most TV’s never cross that line. But he begins to go out in public, to bars, out shopping, maybe to the movies or dinner, and subtle but serious changes begin to take place. The serious TV learns that women do not always go shopping for blouses at Wal Mart in six inch stilettos and short leather mini skirts, and they stop wearing blue eye shadow and false eye lashes... they become more of an every day girl. They simply get better at it.
While the CD and typical TV are completely satisfied with extremely tight corsets, six inch pumps, and silly girl giggles, the serious TV begins to take herself and her female persona much more seriously. She buys clothes and applies her make-up to befit the situation, and starts blending into society better.... she is simply better at being a woman, a lot less inconspicuous about it. She may eventually begin to live her entire life as a woman except for one or two things.... her job, and her family life. A serious TV is almost indistinguishable from a TS, but only at first glance. The differences are in fact, monstrous in scale.
Drag queens are the most obvious in society, the ones most often seen and heard. They are loud, flamboyant, crass, and quite visible. The drag queen is commonly accepted in society as a transsexual but the truth is very, very different. A drag queen is a gay man in a dress, period. Most try to pass themselves off as a transsexual but they are not! A CD or a TV may very well engage in homosexual behavior from time to time, but they live the rest of their lives as normal straight men. They are married and have children mostly, or are very deeply closeted bi-sexual men who live and work in a very straight society. But a drag queen is an openly gay male that usually only dresses as a woman for drag shows and prostitution. A drag queen is a gay man, who lives almost his entire life as a gay man... at work, at home, in bed... he is a gay man. In his heart and mind, he is gay and proud of it. But a drag queen can become quite a convincing woman... they rarely alter their bodies in any way, but they learn the tricks of the trade... lots of padding, tons of make-up, and big hair. And they are only "women" for very short periods of time... to put on a show, or to have sex with men. And they have sex, like about half the CD’s and TV’s, as gay men. They not only receive, but they give... they are versatile... both tops and bottoms.
"She-male" is a term taken over by the pornography industry. In Europe, it is a common term used to describe a transsexual, but in America, it is considered a derogatory term when used to describe a transsexual, as insulting as "******" is to a black man. But a she-male is a drag queen, a gay man in a dress, that has sex for money, usually in the pornography or prostitution business. She-males make most of the x-rated movies you hear about and see. “She-male” is also very commonly used term used to describe a man who fully “transitions” but keeps his penis. We will get into this in detail later, but a “woman” who keeps her penis is hardly a woman, and most of these people will openly describe themselves as a she-male rather than a transsexual anyway.
So, what separates a transsexual from all the rest? Well, opinions in the medical and psychological community slightly disagree, as they do with all the above descriptions of the CD’s, TV’s, TG’s, drag queens, and she-males above. That is what they do, debate and treat such things. I do not. It is not my place. I am here just to give the broad, most accepted descriptions, not to quibble over the details. But what makes a transsexual a transsexual and not a CD, a TV, a TG, a drag queen, or she-male, are indeed major things, major differences, as you will see.
A transsexual is a person who feels deeply that they were born into the wrong body. From birth and earliest memory, they knew something was wrong. They take drastic steps to physically alter their bodies because they finally face the reality that they cannot change their insides, so they change their outside to match how they feel inside... they get implants, surgically remove the hair from their bodies, start serious and dangerous hormone treatments, get castrated, have any number of facial reconstruction surgeries to feminize their face, and have many, many other things done to themselves.
Now, you can say that a TV or a drag queen can and have been known to do some of these things. You are correct, in today’s society it is very, very easy to get your hands on hormones, grow or implant breasts, and change your name, but all of that is meaningless. Exactly what or how far a man goes to transform his body does not in itself make him a transsexual. In other words, if that were the case, then defining a transsexual would be easy. Let’s say that the medical, legal, and psychological communities all got together and established that a specific number of medical alterations had to take place before a man can be considered a transsexual. And let’s say that it was a specific number of physical alterations and/or a specific hormone balance. Then the definition would be something like this: A transsexual is defined as a man who has breasts implants and at least 15 out of 25 possible facial feminization surgeries, and has a estrogen level of at least 385 and a testosterone level below 50. Well, life, and human sexuality, are not that simple. Surgeries alone do not define a transsexual, and it can safely be argued that they have nothing to do with it at all.
A transsexual so feels that they are trapped in the wrong body that they simply begin to live their entire life as the sex they feel they should be. Real simple, and real complicated at the same time. You see, a true TS always lives full time, regardless of the dangers, losses suffered, and problems incurred. They ARE women, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, sexually, and last but not least, take serious steps to physically alter their bodies to make them female. A transsexual cannot change all the other things, she was born that way, but she can change her outsides to match her insides. A transsexual lives, thinks, loves, works, and is, a woman.
Though every member of the transgendered community feels a serious connection to the world of the opposite sex, a transsexual is one who feels that from earliest memory that they were born into the wrong body and take serious steps to correct the problem. They live their lives as they feel it was meant to be lived, and in every aspect of life, quite naturally think and behave as a woman. They receive no thrills or gratification from women's clothing, wearing such things is simply a reflection of who they are, period. For all other transgendered people, living as, feeling like, or having sex like a woman is a choice... they choose when and where, what and for how long. A transsexual has no such choices to make... she was born that way... a woman in a man's body. A genetic and hormonal birth defect. The topic of our next discussion!