Assertiveness: Innate or Learned?

[TheFemalePerspective]

You know there's usually a form to fill and she probably had to tick a reason...


Seriously I think you are confusing being brusque and abrupt with being assertive. Making excuses and not hurting the other person's feelings is a good thing. That said totally depends where you are and the culture.

I'm still learning. I'm sure I'll find the middle ground. In the meantime time, I'll continue to play along the spectrum..

 

[TheFemalePerspective]

Bytch, shut the fukk up with these stupid ass threads!





Granted assertiveness in anonymous internet convos doesn't translate to real world interactions but there you go.

You went from speaking like a hoodrat to actually making a reasonably good point.

 

[FrederickDouglas]

You went from speaking like a hoodrat to actually making a reasonably good point.

The dualities

 

[old_timer]

assertiveness as a trait? you are either born with it or develops by age 5.

learning how to set boundaries and not be a doormat? There are many techniques that can be learned later in life.

so in my opinion --

you are not learning how to be assertive, you are learning to set boundaries

 

[Vandelay]

assertiveness as a trait? you are either born with it or develops by age 5.

learning how to set boundaries and not be a doormat? There are many techniques that can be learned later in life.

so in my opinion --

you are not learning how to be assertive, you are learning to set boundaries

Diabeetus...

 

[TheDragon23]

Oh...and it's definitely learned.

Rly? When u think about, kids r the most assertive ppl. They dont give a fukk wut u think and will let u kno ASAP wut they truly want and will even make a scene till they get it.

WE have to teach them manners and shyt like sharing etc.

 

[TheDragon23]

I didn't say it exactly like that..



It went more like...

Sales Assistant: Why are you returning this?

TFP: I changed my mind. (I stated the reason without justifying it).

Sales Assistant: Why?

TFP: No reason.

Sales Assistant: Was there something wrong with it?

TFP: No, I just changed my mind.



I kept it short and brief.. without feeling the need to justify my reasoning.

U were scared to do this before

 

[Vandelay]

Rly? When u think about, kids r the most assertive ppl. They dont give a fukk wut u think and will let u kno ASAP wut they truly want and will even make a scene till they get it.

WE have to teach them manners and shyt like sharing etc.

That's because the Superego isn't fully developed yet through means of complex communication and cultural norms.

Much in the same way it's instinctual to eat until we're full, it's a learned trait to eat healthy and/or in moderation.

 

[TheDragon23]

Sales people used to get me all the time. I can't tell you how many charities I've signed up to under pressure.



I'm happy to help people.. but I can't help everyone!

Signin up for charities under pressure? U a lost cause

 

[TheDragon23]

That's because the Superego isn't fully developed yet through means of complex communication and cultural norms.

Much in the same way it's instinctual to eat until we're full, it's a learned trait to eat healthy and/or in moderation.

Wut does eating have to do wit wut I said

Im not even sure I understood wut u said in that first part. The superego isnt what ? fukk is a super ego? U mean like Kanye West's ego?

Nah but rly if u mean that becuz they havent learned norms yet, doesnt that justify my point?

 

[Yinny]

Rly? When u think about, kids r the most assertive ppl. They dont give a fukk wut u think and will let u kno ASAP wut they truly want and will even make a scene till they get it.

WE have to teach them manners and shyt like sharing etc.

The making a scene is learned behavior, they pick up on how parents respond to their tears and such.


If I should go that route, my belt collection and back hand will def be silent co-parents.

 

[Mr. Foxx Foxx]

apllying it properly and with class is learned, but honestly, I think you either got or you dont.

 

[Mr. Somebody]

Learned, without an assertive role model it can be a struggle.