BREAKING NEWS!!!!! 5 Yr old boy attacked outside his home by Mountain Lion....

ORDER_66

The Fire Rises 2023
Joined
Feb 2, 2014
Messages
142,285
Reputation
15,705
Daps
574,238
Reppin
Queens,NY
On the next episode of Coli Gladiators... :heh:

giphy.gif


:heh:
 

collateral.

Rookie
Supporter
Joined
Sep 27, 2014
Messages
33,296
Reputation
6,811
Daps
204,219
My job is up in the woods where all the white people live and shyt. I be seeing all types of shyt up here, deer, rabbits running around, beavers. I even saw a coyote lurking around our garbage compacter, dumbass coworker talbout its a baby deer :dead: IDK how that nikka mistook a fawn for a fukking coyote. The day I see little bear and his family is the day I quit :francis:
 
Last edited:

Art Barr

INVADING SOHH CHAMPION
Joined
Apr 30, 2012
Messages
61,916
Reputation
12,199
Daps
87,507
Reppin
CHICAGO
Hey Joe,....
Man Joe,....
I feel sorry for the lil shawty, the lil Dunn.

That was almost ya boi, Art Barr, like about real talk,...
What is it JUNE 2016, so about i wanna say, Jan or feb 2o15.
When I first moved out here in sc.
I befriended this bird dog named breezy.
that I think is mixed with a pitt bull out here.
This dog is lassie smart and be all over the hood or whatever.
Plus, is known out here for being the smart dog of the hood.
Drop dead gorgeous mutt, that was a really independent puppy.
Very big for its age and a great looking dog.
it maybe a long hair Pitt bull terrier from what I can tell.
People are like that is a just a bird dog mutt but I think it has a bit of Pitt in her.
Anyway, breezy, that's the homie.

Like who I be with like in the middle of the night outside smoking with.
I use her for early warning and maybe protection or whatever.
Especially when I first got out here and started seeing forests and woodland areas.
completely removed from my real comfort zone of the city.
All that shyt is completely foreign to a nikka,...
So I am not exploring that shyt at all, more than likely.

So, when we first got down here, the people of the town would say it is some type of predator in the town.
At night the guard dogs would be on ten and when I first got down here they said that was not normal.
So, it must be something big out there like a wolf.
or something predatory like maybe a mountain lion, possibly.

So, I am like you know what.
With my cartoon smoke a blunt in the early club morning am hours ass life.
I should just be on guard for this shyt.

So, of course....
My moms sees this predator first in the hood and is like it is a huge lynx or a bobcat.
Plus says it has like this pale coat and weird ass look.

So I am like you sure, around the house, blah blah blah and since it is the country.
of course the whole town has to know.
I ain't used to that shyt anyway....
Where we share we seen some shyt.
All because I grew up on the lake so it is mad animals in Chicago you may not think is out there but they are.
Like foxes[hitters], c00ns, eggrete [mean ass fukk, just leave the beach for them long legged fukkers], possums, bats, and coyotes [run back in the crib or they hittin you].

It was a Sunday, I remember what day it was and I don't keep track of the days cause I don't work no more everyday is the same.
man it may have been superbowl weekend or something.
All cause this was when I would first watch tv in the living room and I would sit by the front door.
Plus now I think back I remember either walking dead or the panthers on now kinda.
Anyway, the homie breezy run on the front porch and just starts barking and never did this ever before.
So, it throws us off in the house.
Immestediately, I just step out like breezy get away from here with all that loud ass offbrand vocal ass barking shyt.

When she dead looking at me like I am stoopid like lassie and like nikka,...
If you don't pay the fukk attention,...
Man, so I look at her, the dog and decided this dog is to smart to be on dummy and I decide to look in the direction of the porch breezy is barking and i swear to fukk'n god,....
The bobcat IS ON THE fukk'N PORCH WITH ME,.....MY nikka.
NO!!!!!
Not me,...no my nikka, naw son,...
not me,...dunn
Of course me,...Joe!!!
Why me, Joe!!!
Thjs cartoon don't never end,...

So when I am turning my head seeing this ol run down orc fur scraggly faced't veteran looking ass bobcat.
Right by the metal railing inbetween the metal rungs of the porch guard rails,...how I peeked out and to yell and breezy, on some mean shyt like breezy get the fukk off the porch.
Except for in between saying breezy and turning my head to the left and right swivel just on instinct is what saved ya nikka.
All cause I never opened the door and really stepped out.
I just kinda stepped peeked out ready to cuss breezy out for being on the porch making noise.
So somewhere In-between cussin out breezy and oh sheit.
I close the door fast as hell,..
,..while shutting the door at the same time and I turned my head like oh shyt, I'm outta here.
I wish I could have seen myself.
All cause I bet that shyt was od funny as hell.
I wish i could have lol at this whole shyt, including my facial reaction.
Plus when the bobcat seen me pop out at the same time, with my reaction. The metal rung on the guard rails made a noise cause he slinked in and away so fast that his torso got stuck or bumped.
As I think the combo of me poppin out and breezy startled him a bit.
So, the reaction is all three, all tree of us.
were startled by each other we all ran off in our original approaching direction.

So, the metal rung noise the bobcat made was crazy and it sounded like a broken metal bell was rung.
So, that sonic sound was memorable and i will never forget it.
All cause I heard metal guard rails make that noise before.
except this time it was made by something way bigger than a squirrel.
or some other little shyt getting outta dodge between them.
scampering off from being startled to.

My moms was like what's wrong wit'chu.
All cause the new house so little she like right there and just lol's at me.

I bag back in startled as fukk and slam the door hard hard ass hell and since it was new.
It made a funny ass sound like nikka ah hell nah, as I was saying it too.

I know it had to be funny how I looked from that shyt.

Yo, y'all know mad urban wild animals done popped out on me, and chased ya boy.
So, fukk that I got little as hell back in the house.
A fukk'n bobcat and this was like the bobcat.
that was not all majestic looking.
nikka had horrible orc look'n ass fur and his face was wack ass hell looking.
This bobcat my nikka, looked horrible.
I ain't wanna be the nikka it decided to grab, fukk all that.
At least if a nikka gon get munched on let it be the poppin bobcat.
I can't go out to that scraggly look'n ass thing.


Art Barr
 
Last edited:
Top