Speaking of life insurance he needs to put one on her as wellHe’s a whole Ho for letting her move in. It was always gonna end like this. Whose name is the life insurance in?
Cousin mentally breaking after Mother in Law moved in
- Thread starter Micky Mikey
- Start date
Dafunkdoc_Unlimited
Theological Noncognitivist Since Birth
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2012
- Messages
- 45,062
- Reputation
- 8,165
- Daps
- 122,333
- Reppin
- The Wrong Side of the Tracks
Unless neither the office nor the bedroom have a door, I don't see the issue.
I'm an Introvert.
Close the doors.
BaldingSoHard
Veteran
get these nets
Veteran
Married two years and multiple family members have tried to move in?
What kind of family did he marry into?
What kind of family did he marry into?
GnauzBookOfRhymes
Superstar
Mother in law is not the issue - she's just a symptom of the issue.
The real issue here is his inability or unwillingness to make his WIFE understand and fix the problem.
Whenever people throw the "I'm an introvert" line into the mix, it's usually some half hearted attempt to explain away why they don't speak up or why they're so conflict avoidant. I mean I can somewhat understand it if you're just dating someone...but there should be ZERO issues with telling whatever is in your mind/heart to your wife/husband. How the fuk you gonna MARRY someone (meaning you're basically legally/socially etc joined as one) and still not feel comfortable enough to tell your spouse how you really feel.
Sounds like he's maybe made small comments here and there, but never in a way to impress upon the wife the severity of the issue. That's why her response is hot/cold. He needs to tell her asap that she needs to talk to her mother and set boundaries. You didn't mention what kind of health issues she has, but if cleaning etc is a problem then they need to check if her insurance will cover one of those home health aides that can come in a couple times a week, or for a couple hours every day etc.
If breh doesn't step up he's in for a lifetime of shyt like this.
The real issue here is his inability or unwillingness to make his WIFE understand and fix the problem.
Whenever people throw the "I'm an introvert" line into the mix, it's usually some half hearted attempt to explain away why they don't speak up or why they're so conflict avoidant. I mean I can somewhat understand it if you're just dating someone...but there should be ZERO issues with telling whatever is in your mind/heart to your wife/husband. How the fuk you gonna MARRY someone (meaning you're basically legally/socially etc joined as one) and still not feel comfortable enough to tell your spouse how you really feel.
Sounds like he's maybe made small comments here and there, but never in a way to impress upon the wife the severity of the issue. That's why her response is hot/cold. He needs to tell her asap that she needs to talk to her mother and set boundaries. You didn't mention what kind of health issues she has, but if cleaning etc is a problem then they need to check if her insurance will cover one of those home health aides that can come in a couple times a week, or for a couple hours every day etc.
If breh doesn't step up he's in for a lifetime of shyt like this.
My cousin is a good dude but he is losing his mind. He got married 2 years ago and already has had several of his wife's family members try to move in. Finally he gave in to the mother in law due to her health issues. He complains about her sitting on the couch watching tv upstairs the entire day. He works from home and most of the time he is in his office. If he wants to watch TV he goes into the bedroom. Mind you his office and the main bedroom is upstairs too so whenever he goes to the kitchen or uses the restroom, BOOM there she is.
This breh provided a whole bedroom with a queen size bed and flatscreen tv with just about every app and streaming service you can think of. But she insists on watching tv upstairs where he spends most of his time. When she cooks she rarely cleans up after herself. Oh..... And she doesn't practice good hygeine.. Says her room is constantly musty and smells like urine. And yes she is fully capable to cleaning and keeping up her room.
Other than that he says she is very sweet and easy going. But he feels she doesn't have boundaries and or respect his home like she should. The wife puts her foot down sometimes but some time enables this behavior. He doesn't want to hurt the mother in laws feelings but he is at a breaking point. He is an introvert and needs ample time to himself. He has recently start drinking and spending long evenings at a local bar. Sometimes he'll sit in his car for 2 hours afterwards dreading going in his own house
I commend him for stepping up to the plate but am worried about his mental health. Do you feel it is wrong for him to tell the mother in law not to spend so much time upstairs and to clean up after herself? What would you do? And what can advice can I tell him before he has a breakdown.
Racial and national backgrounds please.
Black Americans
Elim Garak
Veteran
Cousin huh? 
African_brehda
Superstar
drastic measures must be taken if it gets to that point. If anything is making me uncomfortable or dreading my own home..I’m taking whatever measures I must, to solve that
WaveWhisperer
Stainless Steel
He need to nut up and tell his wife she needs to go
Man should have peace in his own shyt and if its fukkin with his mental then she needs to go
id be damned if im coming into work stressing and dreading to come home because my wife just letting shyt be
she dont like it she can go to at the cost of my piece of mind
fukk outta here
Man should have peace in his own shyt and if its fukkin with his mental then she needs to go
id be damned if im coming into work stressing and dreading to come home because my wife just letting shyt be
she dont like it she can go to at the cost of my piece of mind
fukk outta here
MajesticLion
Veteran
It is his house and he can set the rules.
I know it sounds harsh but if she doesn’t like it then she can leave.
Mental peace is everything, especially in your own home.
Every single word of this.
My wife and i have had this discussion.
No way in hell are any of our parents ever moving in with us, and no way in hell would we do the same to our kids in the future.
Parents need to understand the burden they can be on their kids.
I know people who never got a chance to start their own life because every cent they made as adults went to their parents.
No way in hell are any of our parents ever moving in with us, and no way in hell would we do the same to our kids in the future.
Parents need to understand the burden they can be on their kids.
I know people who never got a chance to start their own life because every cent they made as adults went to their parents.
He works from home so they’re around each other damn near 24/7
She gotta go. Period
It’s stuff like this I already thought about which makes marriage even less appealing to me. The world out there is brutal and ur home is the only place on this earth you are entitled to find peace in.
If you’re an introvert, before coupling up or getting married it’s important u consider consequences. Could there be a scenario where u may have someone living with u? These scenarios are abundant if u yourself don’t come from a well to do family. And the abundance only increases when u also get with a woman from a similar background.
I hate being lonely at times but I look at the overall picture.
As for the dude in the original post, there ain’t much he can do. It’s too late. He can’t kick her out. And if he’s too mean to her, that might be the fire that incinerates his marriage. And if he can’t find peace in his own home, his job performance will likely suffer. I’m all for helping folks but under no circumstance will I inconvenience myself to a great degree for anyone. And I go to great lengths and lots of prayer to ensure I never have to be in a position where I’m needing anyone’s assistance.
I hate being lonely at times but I look at the overall picture.
As for the dude in the original post, there ain’t much he can do. It’s too late. He can’t kick her out. And if he’s too mean to her, that might be the fire that incinerates his marriage. And if he can’t find peace in his own home, his job performance will likely suffer. I’m all for helping folks but under no circumstance will I inconvenience myself to a great degree for anyone. And I go to great lengths and lots of prayer to ensure I never have to be in a position where I’m needing anyone’s assistance.
Last edited:
ThrobbingHood
“I’m Sorry for 2025”
This is all his fault. He’s meant to be the man of the house. WTF? Put your foot down you p*ssy. I would’ve never let her move in, in the first place.