@depresidential should be a writer this shyt has me :dead

Discussion in 'The Film Room' started by the old mongoose, Jul 3, 2020.

  1. the old mongoose

    the old mongoose Veteran

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    @DPresidential has me :deadmanny:

    https://www.thecoli.com/posts/28057899/
    "Dead ass... Op's post was perfect because it legit made me sense the post nut clarity just from reading it.

    **dream sequence**


    Imagine penetrating that shyt and the wig piece kept falling out of place and revealing the battery pocket on the top of the skull so you had to interrupt your stroke to literally adjust her hair piece again with Velcro...
    :picard:

    And then, you grab the motor oil lubrication that came in the package so you can penetrate again without rubber burn.

    Only to have realized because of the rubbery newness, every time you stroke, shyt sounds like a party city whoopie cushion...:mjcry:


    Then, you happen to get a groove after all of that and begin to enjoy yourself...:mjgrin:...until you catch a glimpse of your reflection off of a picture frame of your high school graduation and on some mr Scrooge shyt, your ghost from graduation past look at you fukking a life sized rubber duckie with a fat ass and ask you whether this is what you wanted for life...

    :wow:

    Causing you to cum in the midst of sheer disgust while you looked directly in the thot doll aka tholl's face only to be reminded of that jigsaw doll from saw because you put makeup on it for purposes of immersion...
    :scusthov:

    At which point you take control over your life and knock the shyt off bed while crying and doing the last thing possible that could restore dignity which it to pick the Tholl up and triumphantly take it downstairs to the garbage bin and as you remove this stain from your life...

    :smugbiden: the first smile of maturity takes over you and as you walk back upstairs a police officer happened to have witnessed you dump the body and because of the premium you paid for ultra realistic layering, he draws a Sig Sauer .45 cal service weapon out and yells, "what the fukk! Hands where I can see em!!!!!!:damn:"

    Only for you to :whoa:and then :dwillhuh: while trying explain its just a doll and as you reach for the receipt with the Skynet Pussies, Inc logo proving it was a doll, the officer, thinking you're the next Charles manson fires a single round from his weapon and all because of a fukking till the end result is...."
     
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  2. the old mongoose

    the old mongoose Veteran

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    https://www.thecoli.com/posts/24670184/
    Imagine being a firefighter and responding a 5 alarm fire...
    [​IMG]

    You rescue the owner of the spot...
    [​IMG]

    The Breh, who happens to be a coli poster of course, coughs up his fukking lungs, blood spraying out of his mouth while he's asking you to come close...

    "You...cough... YOU HAVE TO SAVE SARAH! SHE'S STILL IN THERE!"

    You look at the flames...then back at him as he gets wheeled into the ambulance.

    "fukk", you think as you realize it's moments like these why you became a fukking firemen, you know?

    Your partner is like, "nah chill, PRES DON'T GO! You have a fukking family!"

    You look at your partner and say, "shyt, man...I'm trying to save that poor b*stard's family.":smugdraper:

    You run up the ladder to the roof on some next level firemen shyt...

    [​IMG]

    Walk into that shyt shouting "SARAH! MA'AM, WHERE ARE YOU!!! IM A FIREFIGHTER!!"

    You look left and right... fukk, she might be dead... Then you see an arm and she is saying something over and over:lupe:

    [​IMG] "there she is!"

    You hear a noise and the whole front exit collapses closing off your exit. You run to her...

    And she turns to you on some...[​IMG]
    "System over heat...over heat... Over heat. Sarah shutting down. Please do not turn off power while loading."

    :dwillhuh:



    You burn to death watching this skynet bot melt in front of you.

    [​IMG]


    Now because of this shyt, you're dead trying to save this nikka's life sized barbie. Your family knows it and your partners know it and everybody awkward at your funeral.

    [​IMG]


    I would come back and haunt y'all nikkas.:wow::picard:
     
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  3. DPresidential

    DPresidential The Coli's Ralph Ellison Supporter

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    :russ::russ:

    Aye, respect!

    Dap + rep.

    I appreciate that, breh. I have way more littered throughout the Coli. Sometimes, I get bored and the perfect thread inspires some Stephen Long like fukkery:lolbron:


    Seriously, though, I appreciate it.:salute:

    You never saw the one I made in the thread about what if you woke up in the future with no memory and only the Coli forums to guide you?:youngsabo:

    I think that was my favorite one tonwrite:heh:

    I'll try to find it.
     
  4. DPresidential

    DPresidential The Coli's Ralph Ellison Supporter

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  5. the old mongoose

    the old mongoose Veteran

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  6. Tunez

    Tunez Lloyd Banks Stan Supporter

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    :wow:




    :dead:
     
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  7. DPresidential

    DPresidential The Coli's Ralph Ellison Supporter

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    :lolbron::deadmanny:
     
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  8. Dirty Mcdrawz

    Dirty Mcdrawz Your girl loves em....

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    Ether! ETHER!! ETHER!!!





    :mjlol:
     
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