The thing is growing up in Cali you deal with a lot of harmless, tolerant white folk (relative to the rest of the country) so they're easy to identify, you can read their energy but they're almost ALWAYS so damn oblivious. For me people across demographics who aren't malicious/seeking to harm, but cross boundaries out of ignorance/obliviousness don't need their ass beat. I look down on their lack of knowledge/awareness though and distance myself or if I'm force to remain in proximity set clear boundaries.
The aforementioned couple are still together 4 years later and are good people just weirdo CACs that get overly familiar with people. I know ol' girl probably wanted me to and would still let me fukk, but Idk about ol' boy in terms of his levels of sugar. Through my own witnessed experiences in 22 years,
A LOT of men that identify as heterosexual are really on a spectrum and will do non-Harlem activities or non-Harlem adjacent activities in the right circumstances. Particularly CAC men who've historically had that aura of latent homoeroticism, from college, to club security to working food and beverage, as well as fast food people be on some other shyt.
That's why I mind by muthafukkin business and am comfortable alone