Hold up R. Kelly Calls himself the pied piper i just googled who the pied piper was :wow:

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Yo this thread was made before with the exact same responses. :mindblown: am I having Deja Vu? :wtf:
 

JuvenileHell

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The German version of the tortoise and the hare is :wow:

First off, it's a hedgehog instead of a tortoise, and the pair agree that whoever wins the race gets a bottle of brandy and a gold coin. So right out of the gate, the writers decided that both of these woodland creatures needed to have reached the stage of alcoholism where they treat liquor as currency. SPOILER: All of this is going to culminate in the hare bleeding profusely from the neck. This is not a joke.

After the bet, the hedgehog runs home to his wife and dresses her up so that they look exactly alike, which says all sorts of things about their marriage, and then takes her with him down to the racetrack. Mrs. Hedgehog hides herself at the finish line, while her husband lines up on the starting point next to the hare. When the race starts, the hare easily dusts Mr. Hedgehog, but when Mrs. Hedgehog hears him approaching the finish line, she hops out and crosses it before him, presumably while asking what the hell took him so long.
Naturally, the hare's bullshyt meter starts buzzing, so he insists that they run the race again. She heartily agrees (remember, Mr. Hedgehog is still back at the beginning of the course), and they restart the race from the finish line. The same trick works again, since when the hare rounds the track, there's his opponent apparently waiting for him. The hare demands that they race yet again, to the same result. And again. This process repeats itself more than 70 fukking times, until finally, on the 74th lap, a blood vessel bursts in the hare's throat and he collapses in the middle of the racetrack, gurgling out his last confused breaths as he drowns in his own blood:

Disney straight up pussified a lot of old German stories. The OG Hansel and Gretel is straight up :demonic:
 

Dameon Farrow

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Give these new kats a break. If it doesn't fall under Common Core it's gonna be missing from their education. How many of you have looked into Common Core? Don't say I didn't warn you. :mjlol:And it's been a long time coming.
 

The_Sheff

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Give these new kats a break. If it doesn't fall under Common Core it's gonna be missing from their education. How many of you have looked into Common Core? Don't say I didn't warn you. :mjlol:And it's been a long time coming.

Depend on the state to read to your kids brehs.
 

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Disney straight up pussified a lot of old German stories. The OG Hansel and Gretel is straight up :demonic:

Those German stories are fricken brutal :russ:

i remember reading somewhere that the pied piper was really some crazy pedophile but historians are not too sure but what their really sure about is that kids from hamelin did went away and never came back.
 
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