Celexa has worked wonders. Now i'm trying to ween my way off this shyt. but what do you think is the source of your anxiety?
Let me tell you something.
I made this thread six days ago...and seeing the overwhelming responses and all the notifications in my mentions (over 7,000, wish I took a screenshot) made me freeze in my tracks.
On my tumblr account I have 56 unanswered messages.
On here I have 105 unanswered PMs
When I get a large volume of messages or emails or notifcations online, it actually triggers my anxiety. On twitter, on IG, on here on tumblr.
But that's the territory that comes with being a somewhat known electronic music producer and DJ that promotes themselves heavily if not almost exclusively online.
One thing that made me anxiety ridden was a former friend of mine having a falling out with me then terrorizing me on social media trying to either get me to delete my accounts or just sending harassing antagonizing messages. He made over 65 accounts on twitter just for the sole purpose of trolling me over 2 YEARS, flagging my posts, and harassing me. Everytime I would block one account he would create another. It made me anxious and kind of even made me afraid to check my notifications. And I was going hard on twitter with the music promotion it was getting to the point I had like real famous people starting to follow me on twitter..musicians, djs, producers, celebrities, actors and actresses, singers, political organizations, awareness groups, Vibe Magazine...it was crazy and I spent 10 years trying to get to that point.
Then, the guy gets me banned from twitter...it sent me into a huge depression as ridiculous as it sounds...even after I announced new albums to my fans on Twitter and everything. I thought it was over. What did it was I had a management agency send an email to me the day after it happened and I didn't even know what to do. I just went into a real dark place after a while where nothing made sense...
So I didn't do anything...then I came back on here shortly after it happened after taking 8 months off of here...the last time I posted being the day I got evicted from my apartment in Crown Heights.
I realized I had to overcome my anxiety if I wanted to take my music to new heights...
So in june and july I released two 6 track eps
Then released a new album back in October.
But yeah, social media anxiety...ever since that stalker fukked my shyt up it's made me anxious to promote my music online...cause I'm worried concerned this motherfucekr is going to be hiding trying to do the same shyt again. Like I've legit had to call the cops on this guy and report his more threatening messages to the FBI.
This is what I have to overcome..my fear of success.
I guess I just have to do it...fukk fear