How to deal with college friends?

[Dreamchaser]

How do you guys deal with college friends? I'm struggling with this, I went to PWI, and the group of people that I know is black, white, hispanic and asian. I've been out of college for 8 years, and I'm getting tired of dealing with them. I seem to have issues with the two other black dudes who are half black. We cant seem to see eye to eye. Those dudes are super soft and and my environment was pretty tough. I dont know how to resolve the tension with those dudes. Anyone deal with this issue?

 

[Paper Boi]

why do you need to continue to deal with them?

move on with your life.

 

[Dreamchaser]

why do you need to continue to deal with them?

move on with your life.

Trying to be civil, you never know when you might need someone

 

[2 one 3]

Just stop fukking with them…


It’s completely and 100% natural and OK to outgrow people. Some friends and groups are just seasons in your life and there’s nothing wrong with that. Your college friends served their purpose in college and everyone is grown now.

it might not be all bad, but there is no love lost or anything wrong with setting your own personal boundaries and recognizing that shyt isn’t the same as the college years.

 

[Paper Boi]

Trying to be civil, you never know when you might need someone

I keep in contact regularly with a handful of people from college because most of us just went our separate ways as far as where we live/careers, but honestly if I was honestly having some type of drama/issues with people I went to college with 8 years ago... I'd just cut them out my life. it can't be worth it. we fukking grown ass adults in our 30s now.


unless you seriously think you gonna need these people to give you a job or something down the line, it can't be worth it. and if they really don't fw you or whatever they probably not gonna look out for you anyway.

 

[Dreamchaser]

I keep in contact regularly with a handful of people from college because most of us just wen tour separate ways as far as where we live/careers, but honestly if I was honestly having some type of drama/issues with people I went to college with 8 years ago... I'd just cut them out my life. it can't be worth it. we fukking grown ass adults in our 30s now.


unless you seriously think you gonna need these people to give you a job or something down the line, it can't be worth it. and if they really don't fw you or whatever they probably not gonna look out for you anyway.

I never had a problem with them in college, it was only when we left. We all moved to the same area, and shyt went sideways now. I guess I'm just tried of the complaining after this time. I think it's all about the viewpoint.

 

[Paper Boi]

I never had a problem with them in college, it was only when we left. We all moved to the same area, and shyt went sideways now. I guess I'm just tried of the complaining after this time. I think it's all about the viewpoint.

what is the issue yall arguing about? i'm guessing it's something about race/politics since you mentioned they are biracial.

 

[Buddy]

They’re “super soft”, but you need advice on how to deal with them

 

[Dreamchaser]

what is the issue yall arguing about? i'm guessing it's something about race/politics since you mentioned they are biracial.

Nah it's not race or politics, I think it's upbringing, two of them were brought the same way and I wasn't and it shows.

 

[Paper Boi]

Nah it's not race or politics, I think it's upbringing, two of them were brought the same way and I wasn't and it shows.

I don't know then breh.

if you don't want to cut them out for whatever reason, just keep being you. if they don't like it, fukk em. like i said they probably not gonna be there for you in the long run if yall having issues/butting heads, but you shouldn't be trying to change for em.

if you want to call em out... go ahead, but that might have the same consequence/result of just gradually/quietly cutting them out if they're as soft as you say.

 

[Ciggavelli]

Just stop dealing with them. Unless they live in the same city, you’ll fall out any way. I used to move around a lot as a kid and during college years…like a lot. I’d always joke with people that I’d forget them and we’d be dead to each other after I move. They always laughed. Thing is, it wasn’t a joke.

If you’re not in the same area, time will fix this issue for you

 

[Sukairain]

It's been eight years since you graduated and you're still friends? Damn, I graduated only three years ago and I cut contact with all my university friends. I don't speak to any of them anymore. They were a means to an end, now the end is done and I have no need of them anymore.

Just let it go. University friends aren't lifelong friends. They're friends of convenience. Once you're graduated there's no need to stay that close to them anymore.

I'll ask you something, how many of them would actually help you out? For example, how many would help you to move house. How many would help you fix your car or fix something around the house. How many would help you assemble something. How many would come help you if you were stranded somewhere?

Those are your real friends, people you can count on to help you when you really need somebody's help. If there are any in your group, keep them in your life. But the rest have served their purpose and it's time to let them go. For me, none of my university friends would help me like that, so I let all of them go.

University friends are like work friends. They're good to socialise with and have a few drinks with on a Friday evening at the end of the work week. But once you no longer work together, why would you continue to socialise with them?

 

[Dreamchaser]

It's been eight years since you graduated and you're still friends? Damn, I graduated only three years ago and I cut contact with all my university friends. I don't speak to any of them anymore. They were a means to an end, now the end is done and I have no need of them anymore.

Just let it go. University friends aren't lifelong friends. They're friends of convenience. Once you're graduated there's no need to stay that close to them anymore.

I'll ask you something, how many of them would actually help you out? For example, how many would help you to move house. How many would help you fix your car or fix something around the house. How many would help you assemble something. How many would come help you if you were stranded somewhere?

Those are your real friends, people you can count on to help you when you really need somebody's help. If there are any in your group, keep them in your life. But the rest have served their purpose and it's time to let them go. For me, none of my university friends would help me like that, so I let all of them go.

University friends are like work friends. They're good to socialise with and have a few drinks with on a Friday evening at the end of the work week. But once you no longer work together, why would you continue to socialise with them?

Excluding the women in the group, one of the dudes I'm super close with. I was in his wedding. One of the girls is a mess, and the other I'm messing around with, there is one chick I'm cool with on some friendship shyt. Theres the two mixed black dudes that seem to have issues with me. Theres a married couple that I'm cool with but they are in a different wave.

 

[GreenGhxst]

The signs are there, move on

You're posting about them on the coli breh

Move on..... stop wasting your energy and time on things that no longer bear fruit

Its hard, but you'll respect yourself a lot more if you do what must be done...

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

What a bytch made thread


Gah damm yall soft


How to deal with?