“I Love My Children With All My Heart But My Marriage Gets Priority Over Them.”

[Diunx]

"mom I'm hungry"

"Eat some bread nikka, me and your dad had a fight so I'm gonna go suck his cock for a couple of mins"

 

[Action Mike]

I agree

 

[larsattack]

What does a priority for your spouse over your child look like in the real world ??

 

[BuckFilly]

nikkas with this mindset get cheated on

 

[MustafaSTL]

Some people stop going on dates, stop having sex, and just plainly put their love life in the backseat for the sake of kids

I’m not sure how you can’t do both. And going on dates and still being intimate doesn’t mean you’re prioritizing the wife first over the kids. My wife and I still do a lot of things together. Go on vacations together, etc. Don’t feel like this is putting her over our kids. It’s taking care of everyone equally.

 

[Gloxina]

Same concept on a plane when they tell you apply your oxygen mask first and then your children

If your marriage isn't the priority and becomes unhealthy, it will eventually trickle down to your kids

As the great Michael Jeffery Jordan once said, “ F**k them kids!”

On a serious note. God first, Wife second, children third in that order. God will guide me to take care of my household and marriage. Once my Wife and household is taken care of and secure, the children will benefit.

A lot of relationships probably wouldn’t have ended if they did prioritize the spouses before the children

It’s not like he’s saying he doesn’t prioritize his children.. not at all.

You should prioritize your family FIRST.. the children are a part of that.

It’s just the spouse SHOULD be the most prioritized individual, even if subconsciously, because if the spouses aren’t on the same page then the family unit begins to fail. Then after the kids, it should be everyone else.

Kinda like how “you can’t take care of anyone if you cant take care of yourself”. One of my instructors in HS actually told me that specifically (not completely sure why).

But get yourself right, then your spouse, then your kids, because if you neglect in that order, shyt will be miserable and/or fail from what I’ve seen.

You can do both. The attention my wife and I gave to each other and the children we raised fluctuated based on the circumstances and needs of the individual. It is a dynamic process that you have to do in order to keep your marriage viable while also raising well-adjusted children. So effective communication is a must between everyone to make sure we all understand each other's circumstances and needs to effectively deal with them.

So here are some of the things my wife and I would do to make sure we all remain connected to each other.

1. Girls outing where my wife would take the girls on shopping sprees, vacations, events, entertainment, etc. Giving them time to connect and talk with me not being around.

2. Outings with me only doing some of the same things, but also some different things we like to do together like miniature golf, batting range, arcades, and certain movie types we enjoyed. We would talk and just enjoy each other's company.

3. Husband and Wife-only activities from dates, vacations, and jazz clubs to just sending the girls out so we can just spend some quality time enjoying each other's bodies and minds.

4. Family events from just evening meals together every Sunday when they got older home movie nights to outside activities and vacations to extended family events and interesting locations that everyone had a hand in choosing.

5. We each made sure we had time to ourselves enjoying hobbies and solo activities. Giving each of us time away from each other.

6. We never, ever, allowed the girls to pit us against each other. We would always maintain a united front when it came to decisions concerning their well-being. We always made sure we knew what each other said to them when it came to giving permission. Cuts down on a lot of possible misunderstandings and arguments over rearing styles.

7. Also, we never hid our age-appropriate disagreements with each other from the girls, we did make sure we remained respectful in our arguments. We never cursed at each other, we never reacted violently towards each other. If we got so angry that we needed to cool off, we ended our interaction until we cooled off and could let rational thinking prevail. If we could not come to an agreement, we would just end the argument by agreeing to disagree.

There is more, but what is above generally covers it. With my youngest sister married and my daughter in college, my wife and I have a lot of time with each other. Since we worked to maintain our relationship throughout the years, we find ourselves enjoying each other's company even more. Outside of the minor worry about our adult girls being out in the world on their own, we have found we have far more time to just spoil each other. It is a nice place to be, even with my present health issues.

 

[sportscribe]

But many couples that based their life around their kids end up without a life once the kids are gone because the children were the center of the marriage.

Life is about balance.

Our kids do exceptionally well, because our relationship is based on faith and we have a hands on parenting style, but we always make sure we have our date nights and go on trips together as much as we can.

 

[Sad Bunny]

I get what he’s saying but of course black people need to have a dumbass argument every week fake outrage

 

[Hamsterdam921]

I’m not sure how you can’t do both. And going on dates and still being intimate doesn’t mean you’re prioritizing the wife first over the kids. My wife and I still do a lot of things together. Go on vacations together, etc. Don’t feel like this is putting her over our kids. It’s taking care of everyone equally

We are basically agreeing because at the end of the day it is all about balance. If I can’t do two things at once I’m going to prioritize the thing I feel is the most important which some couples choose children

 

[Heafcliffe]

Childless but ain't no way in any fashion on this earth my kids come second to anything.

 

[Mowgli]

The household degrades if a woman loses focus on keeping the head happy.

You'll understand the balance when you get here

 

[goatmane]

.

 

[ThrobbingHood]

The household degrades if a woman loses focus on keeping the head happy.

Double entendre… I won’t even ask you how.

 

[jilla82]

how much attention do yall think a 13 yr old needs!?

kids mostly learn from watching the people in their environment...
they'll learn more from observing a healthy relationship than you hovering over them

 

[big bun]

My children are my priority