Guru
1995 -
So today at work morning (Lowes) I'm walking some nikka throughout the entire store getting helping find a list of items he needed for his new pool. Dude looked about 65 years old, had a heavy ass italian accent and he reminded me of a character out of Eyes Wide Shut dressed in all black, something real sleazy and eerie about him
So I helping this dude get all his stuff (including rocks and bricks) and loaded it up on his uhaul, get into the uhual and see a big ass bible verse painted in graffiti that say; Humble yourselves therefore under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up that is testimony of Peter chapter 5 verse 6, didn't think much of it so I left it alone plus I didn't have to do any of this, but because it was extremely slow earlier this morning I decided to make myself look busy and assist him. I think he noticed so before he left he handed me a $50 dollar tip, which I couldn't take.
He forced me to take it, shoving it into my vest pocket, I'm looking like
then he wrote down a number on a piece of paper and said
What do you make doing this job? Like 10, 12 an hour? Not a very rewarding or exciting life. I'll tell you what, you give me a call when you get tired of this crap and I'll expose you to a lifestyle you could never even dream of, so then I'm thinking like
You seem like a good kid, you look out for others and stick by them even when you don't need to. Good qualities I could use in my line of work, if you know what I'm saying and proceeded to say; And they had tails like unto scorpions, and there were stings in their tails: and their power was to hurt men five months that is the prophecy of revelations chapter 9 verse 10; I'm just standing like
Then he winked, got in his truck and left... dead serious
Although there is a possibility he prolly wanna rape me, I'd like to think that I had just been offered an opportunity to join a cult. I don't know if I should call or not...
EDIT: UPDATE
So I went into my to car to call, I ain't want none of my noisy ass co workers listening in the conversation, left out some bits but here;
Phone:Wally (???) services can I help you?
Me: Umm yeah, I got a phone number from someone that I guess works for your company
Phone: Is this the Lowes guy?
Me: What?
Phone: Is this the Lowes guy?
Me: Yeah?
Phone: We were expecting a call from you, have you considered the offer yet?
Me: I dont even know what the offer is?
Phone: Ok well Ill tell you, we run a service down here in Manhattan. Were originally from New York, but weve been all over. Service is good down in here in the city and with the power of persuasion, good business ethics and the right people, especially the right people, well quickly establish a reputation out here, but were having trouble finding the right people right now though. We've even got back from some big celebs. You interested in the job?
Me: Which celebs?
Phone: Oh you know the big ones. I said are interested in the job?
Me: What does the job entail exactly?
Phone: Oh nothing really. This and that. We need someone to assist in the operations of our service.
Me: Um I don't really know anything about construction, I just work at Lowes, but most of the time I dont really know what Im talking about so I dont know if that's going to be-
Phone: Not a problem, youll rarely be out at any construction sites anyway.
Me: So? what would I be doing?
Phone: The last guy we had did a lot of driving amongst other things. Actually I should ask you a few questions before we go any further
Me: Ok? I guess
Phone: Did you graduate high school?
Me: Yeah like 5 years ago
Phone: Do you have a college degree?
Me: umm kind of I have an associates degree, I dont know if that counts.
Phone: Hey thats still a college degree. Do you have any military experience?
Me: No I dont
Phone: Any experience with law enforcement?
Me: No I dont
Phone: Do you have any friends or family that are in law enforcement?
Me: No, I dont umm ?knock on door-
Phone: One second? (he puts down the phone)
(I put this through a garageband speaker system I got in my car and enhanced the sound and this is what I heard) (serious)
Someone: theyre going with Manny.
Phone: What?
They want to go with who they can trust.
Phone: They can trust us, whats the problem here?
Manny, wont back down. Says he gots business to run.
Phone: That son of a bytch, you see hes become useless now. I tell ya what, you, me and Pete will go down and visit manny. Don?t fukking touch him, but you have a stern talking to him. A stern fukking talking and tell him if he doesnt honor his side of the code that hell no longer have a business to run, you got me? You call me as soon as youre done
Phone: You still there?
Me: yeah?
Phone: Ill tell you what boss, Im going to give you a few days to think it over. If you like that lifestyle at your current job then by all means stay there, but if youre looking to make some new friends, a lot more money, you give me a call by Sunday and well set up a meeting. Sound good?
Me: umm
Then he hangs up. dead serious
So I helping this dude get all his stuff (including rocks and bricks) and loaded it up on his uhaul, get into the uhual and see a big ass bible verse painted in graffiti that say; Humble yourselves therefore under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up that is testimony of Peter chapter 5 verse 6, didn't think much of it so I left it alone plus I didn't have to do any of this, but because it was extremely slow earlier this morning I decided to make myself look busy and assist him. I think he noticed so before he left he handed me a $50 dollar tip, which I couldn't take.
He forced me to take it, shoving it into my vest pocket, I'm looking like
then he wrote down a number on a piece of paper and saidWhat do you make doing this job? Like 10, 12 an hour? Not a very rewarding or exciting life. I'll tell you what, you give me a call when you get tired of this crap and I'll expose you to a lifestyle you could never even dream of, so then I'm thinking like
You seem like a good kid, you look out for others and stick by them even when you don't need to. Good qualities I could use in my line of work, if you know what I'm saying and proceeded to say; And they had tails like unto scorpions, and there were stings in their tails: and their power was to hurt men five months that is the prophecy of revelations chapter 9 verse 10; I'm just standing like Then he winked, got in his truck and left... dead seriousAlthough there is a possibility he prolly wanna rape me, I'd like to think that I had just been offered an opportunity to join a cult. I don't know if I should call or not...
EDIT: UPDATE
So I went into my to car to call, I ain't want none of my noisy ass co workers listening in the conversation, left out some bits but here;
Phone:Wally (???) services can I help you?
Me: Umm yeah, I got a phone number from someone that I guess works for your company
Phone: Is this the Lowes guy?
Me: What?
Phone: Is this the Lowes guy?
Me: Yeah?
Phone: We were expecting a call from you, have you considered the offer yet?
Me: I dont even know what the offer is?
Phone: Ok well Ill tell you, we run a service down here in Manhattan. Were originally from New York, but weve been all over. Service is good down in here in the city and with the power of persuasion, good business ethics and the right people, especially the right people, well quickly establish a reputation out here, but were having trouble finding the right people right now though. We've even got back from some big celebs. You interested in the job?
Me: Which celebs?
Phone: Oh you know the big ones. I said are interested in the job?
Me: What does the job entail exactly?
Phone: Oh nothing really. This and that. We need someone to assist in the operations of our service.
Me: Um I don't really know anything about construction, I just work at Lowes, but most of the time I dont really know what Im talking about so I dont know if that's going to be-
Phone: Not a problem, youll rarely be out at any construction sites anyway.
Me: So? what would I be doing?
Phone: The last guy we had did a lot of driving amongst other things. Actually I should ask you a few questions before we go any further
Me: Ok? I guess
Phone: Did you graduate high school?
Me: Yeah like 5 years ago
Phone: Do you have a college degree?
Me: umm kind of I have an associates degree, I dont know if that counts.
Phone: Hey thats still a college degree. Do you have any military experience?
Me: No I dont
Phone: Any experience with law enforcement?
Me: No I dont
Phone: Do you have any friends or family that are in law enforcement?
Me: No, I dont umm ?knock on door-
Phone: One second? (he puts down the phone)
(I put this through a garageband speaker system I got in my car and enhanced the sound and this is what I heard) (serious)
Someone: theyre going with Manny.
Phone: What?
They want to go with who they can trust.
Phone: They can trust us, whats the problem here?
Manny, wont back down. Says he gots business to run.
Phone: That son of a bytch, you see hes become useless now. I tell ya what, you, me and Pete will go down and visit manny. Don?t fukking touch him, but you have a stern talking to him. A stern fukking talking and tell him if he doesnt honor his side of the code that hell no longer have a business to run, you got me? You call me as soon as youre done
Phone: You still there?
Me: yeah?
Phone: Ill tell you what boss, Im going to give you a few days to think it over. If you like that lifestyle at your current job then by all means stay there, but if youre looking to make some new friends, a lot more money, you give me a call by Sunday and well set up a meeting. Sound good?
Me: umm
Then he hangs up. dead serious
Last edited:
He's probably a loan shark 
You can be a hitman
