Mr Uncle Leroy
All Star
she gotta be on the same page, if not it gets tough
also, the goals gotta be reachable, if not, it gets tough
also, the goals gotta be reachable, if not, it gets tough
i think you should be successful before getting married
- Thread starter cleanface coney
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cleanface coney
Superstar
I get what you're saying, it's easy for people to get comfortable, especially when they found "the one" - because that person took them as they are.
But the flipside is, some people are dedicated strictly on becoming successful/rich/etc. I don't knock that one bit, but some of them do it at the cost of building anything with anyone. Then when they reached that dream/goal, they are struggling to find someone, especially if they hit it big. Now they gotta sift through all the fakes, and those that are more attracted to your success than you as a person.
I rather come up with someone as we both try to achieve our dreams, and hit it big together, supporting each other - since I know she was there before it all happened, and will be there if it were to all go away.
I might be jaded though because I work at a Family Law firm and almost all divorces, one partner was real successful before the marriage. Makes me wonder if that was the driving force behind the initial nuptials. I shouldn't generalize it though.
true true
what about the people that both had success?
was it more of an understanding because they both had they own and knew and knows what it took to get it?
CJ
Your objective semi-troll
Way more civil, that's for sure. Only gets tricky if they expanded on things together (ie: real estate/investments, etc.) - but overall it's pretty quick since they just want to keep their initial assets and sell off the Matrimonial home
The real fight is usually custody.
Trust me I know, I see it everyday at work
And that's my point, always try to find the right person, whether your successful yet or not.
But everyone thinks they have found the "right" person when they get married and most are wrong!
CJ
Your objective semi-troll
Because they're being illogical...
A lot of people chose money sex and looks over compatible long lasting qualities...
long lasting qualities such as?
cleanface coney
Superstar
Way more civil, that's for sure. Only gets tricky if they expanded on things together (ie: real estate/investments, etc.) - but overall it's pretty quick since they just want to keep their initial assets and sell off the Matrimonial home
The real fight is usually custody.
so im not completely wrong i guess
i think i depends on the person too like i said
im real driven/ambitious right now
i might be more family oriented later on in life
but at some point i would like to feel comfortable my wife/soon to be wife
at some point was on her grind and got her own shyt
i mean emotional stability is cool but this is 2012
and aint that many people got your back man or woman
cleanface coney
Superstar
so do you think ambition/ability to achieve and maintain success is a long lasting quality?
not neccessarily money when i mean success i mean more
like living life with a purpose and everything you do has a purpose
if not what?
Well of course ...sex ...money...and looks should never be the foundation any relationship is built upon...
Depends on what you like for yourself...if you like a woman that keeps herself fit.. Don't marry a junk eating woman with a nice body that never exercises...
Or if you have goals to open your own company but you are dating a woman that believes jobs are the only option...it probably won't work...
The list can go on....but to simplify the answer the things you don't see yourself changing in 10years about yourself you should find someone that has similar qualities.
Zapp Brannigan
Captain of the Nimbus
Just to play devil's advocate... why would I marry a girl that'd have me as a loser? Wouldn't I want a woman that pushed me to be at my very best? Just sayin'.
Zapp Brannigan
Captain of the Nimbus
OP, I think that you're stating the painfully obvious, but I think that this is only obvious to smart people. Eh. At least you've got it right. Hope you find the right lady.
Hell yes!...I hate people with no ambition...I cannot date anyone without ambition and the ability to achieve...cause their laziness will encourage me to be like them...and a man with ambitions but no way to achieve them is a hamster on a wheel I don't need selling me pipe dreams...anyone can talk...
Just to play devil's advocate... why would I marry a girl that'd have me as a loser? Wouldn't I want a woman that pushed me to be at my very best? Just sayin'.
cleanface coney
Superstar
are you a real girl or internet girl?
if a real girl then you should understand where im coming from
i honestly think its easier to to be with somebody if you are successful already
now if you meet a guy thats matching yo success you gonna understand everything he went through to get there
what if you with somebody before success but they turn into a damn fool once yall reach it
or if the guy that has success is already a clown you can keep it movin cuz you got your own
what you think?