Dorian Breh
Veteran
Everyone was chilling relaxing having a good time, I wasn't really feeling any of the girls but the food was hitting and it's the summer I'm just trying to kick it you know 
So I'm playing the sidelines, not really getting that drunk yet because I got dinner plans later that I'm not trying to be catatonic for.
Hour or two goes by and looks like I'm the only one practicing any sort of moderation. Everyone else at the party is fukking SHMACKED
The girls, who I gotta tell you they were all pretty big which my boy hosting the party is into so I sort of expected that, are stumbling drunk and keep accidentally bouncing off each other like bumper cars or some shyt
The token white girl at the party, a certified FAWG, is so drunk she keeps asking everyone for coke and forgetting they already gave her the
like three times
I'm not tryna get knocked into the pool by one of the stumbling big girls so I position myself over near the fence and light up a spliff with some of the brehs to watch the show
All of a sudden one of the guys, whose been pretty quiet so far, starts talking crazy. He like, "Ima fight every bytch in this party
"
Were all like
So he explains that one of the girls stepped on his foot by accident and fukked up his Walmart slides he was wearing and since he's not sure which one it is, he gonna fight all of them
Now normally I can't condone a man fighting women but based on the tale of the tape breh was giving at least 50 lbs and I knew some of the girls from back in high school and I knew they could fight so I didn't try that hard to dissuade dude from this course of action
Honestly I was pretty sure he was gonna get mashed on by the big girls and the party had gotten a little stale so I was there for it
So breh takes his fukked up Walmart slides off and asks us to watch them for him ( like someone gonna steal them
) and takes a run at the nearest chick
He cannonballs into this girl and sort of just bounces off but, unperturbed, he comes back with a haymaker to her body which also does nothing
At this point the other girls notice what's going on and come to their home girls aid and breh giving body shots out to all of em at once
The girls tryna fight back but my guy has pretty good footwork and he's slipping the punches and coming back with the body shots. shyt look like that old Street Fighter game or Tekken or something he's landing all these combos and shyt
But after a few minutes of this, with the rest of the party cheering them on and gambling on who gonna win, it's clear that man's is getting gassed. He's getting rope a doped by the sheer mass of his opponents. He not really taking any damage but the body shot combos ain't doing shyt
He seems to recognize that if he keeps on going this way hes gonna run out of steam and end up a flattened pancake on the pool deck so he changes strategies
He start circling the big girl gang now, getting them confused and drunkenly stumbling into each other
Every so often he lunge forward and throw a right hook at one of the girls whose back is turned from stumbling around
After a couple of these shots one of the girl is getting pretty dazed and gets separated from the rest of her crew standing dangerously close to the edge of the pool
Home boy notices this and puts a whole ass front kick into her chest, sending her flying backwards into the pool. She lands with such impact I swear half the pool water splashes up, soaking all of us and putting out the spliff I'm smoking
At this point I've had enough and step forward hollering, "Breh, this has gone too far. THIS IS MADNESS."
This drunk maniac turn and look at me like
NO!
THIS IS FATNESS!
Then just turns around like it's nothing and goes back to busting these girls wigs
I knew the police was gonna come soon so and I'm pretty sure I'm on papers so I at that point I just had to dip
So I'm playing the sidelines, not really getting that drunk yet because I got dinner plans later that I'm not trying to be catatonic for.
Hour or two goes by and looks like I'm the only one practicing any sort of moderation. Everyone else at the party is fukking SHMACKED
The girls, who I gotta tell you they were all pretty big which my boy hosting the party is into so I sort of expected that, are stumbling drunk and keep accidentally bouncing off each other like bumper cars or some shyt
The token white girl at the party, a certified FAWG, is so drunk she keeps asking everyone for coke and forgetting they already gave her the
like three times I'm not tryna get knocked into the pool by one of the stumbling big girls so I position myself over near the fence and light up a spliff with some of the brehs to watch the show
All of a sudden one of the guys, whose been pretty quiet so far, starts talking crazy. He like, "Ima fight every bytch in this party
"
Were all like
So he explains that one of the girls stepped on his foot by accident and fukked up his Walmart slides he was wearing and since he's not sure which one it is, he gonna fight all of them
Now normally I can't condone a man fighting women but based on the tale of the tape breh was giving at least 50 lbs and I knew some of the girls from back in high school and I knew they could fight so I didn't try that hard to dissuade dude from this course of action
Honestly I was pretty sure he was gonna get mashed on by the big girls and the party had gotten a little stale so I was there for it
So breh takes his fukked up Walmart slides off and asks us to watch them for him ( like someone gonna steal them
) and takes a run at the nearest chickHe cannonballs into this girl and sort of just bounces off but, unperturbed, he comes back with a haymaker to her body which also does nothing
At this point the other girls notice what's going on and come to their home girls aid and breh giving body shots out to all of em at once
The girls tryna fight back but my guy has pretty good footwork and he's slipping the punches and coming back with the body shots. shyt look like that old Street Fighter game or Tekken or something he's landing all these combos and shyt
But after a few minutes of this, with the rest of the party cheering them on and gambling on who gonna win, it's clear that man's is getting gassed. He's getting rope a doped by the sheer mass of his opponents. He not really taking any damage but the body shot combos ain't doing shyt
He seems to recognize that if he keeps on going this way hes gonna run out of steam and end up a flattened pancake on the pool deck so he changes strategies
He start circling the big girl gang now, getting them confused and drunkenly stumbling into each other
Every so often he lunge forward and throw a right hook at one of the girls whose back is turned from stumbling around
After a couple of these shots one of the girl is getting pretty dazed and gets separated from the rest of her crew standing dangerously close to the edge of the pool
Home boy notices this and puts a whole ass front kick into her chest, sending her flying backwards into the pool. She lands with such impact I swear half the pool water splashes up, soaking all of us and putting out the spliff I'm smoking
At this point I've had enough and step forward hollering, "Breh, this has gone too far. THIS IS MADNESS."
This drunk maniac turn and look at me like
NO!
THIS IS FATNESS!
Then just turns around like it's nothing and goes back to busting these girls wigs
I knew the police was gonna come soon so and I'm pretty sure I'm on papers so I at that point I just had to dip
