1996 and guide myself through college.
I'd be like...
Future me: You see that girl right there?
1996 me: That dime?

Yea man, I see her.
Future me: You're gonna take her home in a few weeks. She's gonna wanna fukk you, but you're gonna talk yourself out of the p*ssy.
1996 me:

Word!?!?! You really think she's gonna like me? What if I bust too fast? What if she thinks my dikk is too small? What if she doesn't call me after??!?!
Future me:

You see... that's exactly why I'm here.
1996 me:
Future me: Start buying gold and silver too.
1996 me:

What? Why?
Future me:

nikka would you just shut the fukk up and listen to me.