Ive come to the realization i mite not ever become shyt

[PhonZhi]

im assuming you dont have kids. if you feel this way now whatever you do dont have any. and you are right, everyone cant become successful in this life. the best thing that can happen is to be content. you may not end up living your dream life or working your dream career but only a very lucky few does. If you can find you a career thats non-stressful and you dont mind going to everyday then you've won. and DONT have any kids unless you are ready for your money to go into taking care of someone else and being forced into having to make alot of money and work lots of hours

 

[Yinny]

you are only 20 and have already declared yourself failure in life?

Yeah, seriously. Who does that?

Everyone has a point in their life where they realize they aren't where they thought they'd be, but you have to reassess your goals (which I hope weren't actually to be in NBA after you turned 15 ) and figure out what's next, with help of course.

 

[DrHackenbush]

just be grateful for what you DO have and you'll never be depressed

 

[DopeMan]

*I actually showed up for work and got the news by reading my emails after having bought breakfast and sitting down at my desk. How embarrassing... They had baloons all over the place to. I lowkey wonder if it was to celebrate my departure. Remember I made the thread about nobody fukkin with me at work? I don't even know why they didn't like yo boy mang..

link to thread?

Im in a similar spot right now

 

[Grams]

@Rawtid stays giving out good advie

 

[DaRealness]

I've been where you are and then some. I'm not gonna share personal details, but if I can make it you definitely have a chance.

The mere fact you acknowledge that you will need therapy is a good thing in itself. Once you get the help you need, the (real) friends and the girls will come....but you need to sort yourself out beforehand. Personally, meditation and some self help books/audios still helps me to this day - if you're interested I can PM some info. Also, pursue any hobbies/interests that will get you out of bed in the morning. Exercise is definitely important. I recently started a great new job, but I recently signed for membership for a brand new gym that will be opening next month in order to stay physically and mentally healthy.

You're only 20 years, you got a chance. I wish I could be 20 again and do things a lot differently, but life is all about learning. If you read a lot of success stories, you'll find that even the immensely successful people struggled with the same or similar feelings as you at one point.

 

[SemiEnlightenedBum]

look at your user title,was there ever any doubt..

 

[The 2020 New Member]

most people don't even know who the hell they are until they're in their 30s. chill.

 

[Mr. Pink]

So I just got fired(technically "my placement ended", since i was with an agency).*

Im 20, out of school. Graduated with an average of prolly like 50% or sumthin(i havent even checked so idk). No friends, no girl.

Now I dont wanna make any excuses for myself, but I know something is wrong with me, inside my head or whatever, and I need help. I been dealing with depression for some years now, that derives from other problems with myself that I can't figure exactly what they are. That suicide thread I made wasn't a trolling attempt.**

I've come to the conclusion that it isn't just a phase and I won't be able to deal with it myself so I'll actively seek help and go see a therapist. Ive been holding on to this dream of becoming an artist for a while now but absolutely nothing has materialized over the years and that's cause of the fact that I'm way to unstable to have the consistent focus and dedication to make it.

I plan on going back to school, I don't know for what, but I figure with at least some education I will avoid living a struggle shytty existence forever. Sorry, I mean a less struggle shytty existence. Tbh I don't even know if I would be able to make it through school but hopefully the help I will get in the future enables it by making me more balanced.

I know yall prolly dont give a shyt but I just felt like sharing this with someone. The present sure is different from what I envisioned as a little kid with dreams of the NBA and many other things.

*I actually showed up for work and got the news by reading my emails after having bought breakfast and sitting down at my desk. How embarrassing... They had baloons all over the place to. I lowkey wonder if it was to celebrate my departure. Remember I made the thread about nobody fukkin with me at work? I don't even know why they didn't like yo boy mang.
**I also got serious OCD and tho it can be very annoying at time that isn't the end of the world and far from my biggest problem.

I'm going to go ahead and speculate that the main reason you're unhappy is because you're not working on anything. As the saying goes idle hands are the devil's playthings. You need to be building something, anything. A skill, a business, a nice body - no homo. And get out of your own head for a while, stop obsessing over how shytty you have it.

Above all else, you need discipline and willpower in your life. All of your "failures" and angst made you depleted of energy and stressed. You have no motivation or passion. That's why your work sucks and that's why you can't connect with people.
The good news is that those things are not set in stone. It's not a scenario of "you either have it or you don't". They are based on momentum, and you can cultivate them.
For the next month if you want to feel better you should make an effort to do as many of these things as possible, every day:

-physical excercise( you don't necesarily have to joing a gym)
-don't "snack" or eat junk food. Eat only 2-3 regular meals a day
-wake up at 5 a.m.
-take cold showers
-don't jerk off or watch porn(probably the hardest)
-whenever you go out you should look your absolute best. Wear your nicest clothes, be well groomed
-have a "to-do list" every day. Write down everything you must do for the following day, no matter how small or insignificant, and do them
-keep a correct posture: don't slouch, chest and head held high, make eye-contact with everyone
-don't drink or smoke weed
-stay away from depressive media. Listen to energetic music, watch inspiring and uplifting movies like Rocky or Pursuit of Happyness

If you manage to do these things with enough consistency that they become habits I promise you, you'll feel like a completely new person. You're going to gain discipline and pride. You're going to be productive and creative and alive with passion.

 

[King Poetic]

u need any type of degree nowadays especially if u black and want to have at least some type of life to live and have a roof over your head..

get a job at burger king or somewhere else until u get yourself right.. and don't sit up here and listen to others saying u should hold out till u find a real job.. those jobs are real and u get a paycheck

 

[Grams]

you are only 20 and have already declared yourself failure in life?

This isn't such a stretch.

At 20 you realize that you'll never be a professional athlete
At 20 you realize that you're not cut out to be a doctor, lawyer, businessman, etc. and are going to have to work a menial job and then die
At 20 you realize that you do not have any real skills
At 20 you realize no girl wants/would want to be with ya bum ass
At 20 you can be waiting to just die already

@BlackBieber go to therapy I don't wanna see a black breh take mental L'z like this

 

[↓R↑LYB]

@BlackBieber I went through a similar situation in life, but I was a few years younger than you (maybe 18 or so). I was miserable, depressed, suicidal, the whole 9. I can't remember exactly how the subject came up, but I'm a huge Jay-Z fan and Hard Knock Life was playing on MTV or something. My older brother came to me and said something that literally changed my life. I was looking miserable and dude said "nikka the fukk you depressed for ? You listen to Jay-Z music so much, you need to take heed to what he saying in that song, "If my situation ain't improving, Ima murder everything moving."

That shyt had me like That convo lit a spark in my ass that's there to this day. I was like either I'm gonna be a success, or I'm gonna go on a murder spree, either way I'm making history.

Use your frustration, anger, pain, and every other emotion you got and channel that bytch into making your dreams come true. If not, I hope to see you on a CNN special in a couple years

 

[↓R↑LYB]

just be grateful for what you DO have and you'll never be depressed

It depends. Depression can be mental illness, and no amount of positive thinking can fix that. I probably need to go and get actually tested, but I'm pretty sure I suffer from some form of mental illness. For as long as I can remember, even as a kid of 5 years old, I've always looked at life like, if I died today I wouldn't even give a fukk. I just decided long ago, foolishly or not, that if I'm not strong enough to deal with my mental illness without seeking professional help, then I deserve to die.

But that sounds like something a mentally ill person would say

 

[BlackBieber]

@BlackBieber I went through a similar situation in life, but I was a few years younger than you (maybe 18 or so). I was miserable, depressed, suicidal, the whole 9. I can't remember exactly how the subject came up, but I'm a huge Jay-Z fan and Hard Knock Life was playing on MTV or something. My older brother came to me and said something that literally changed my life. I was looking miserable and dude said "nikka the fukk you depressed for ? You listen to Jay-Z music so much, you need to take heed to what he saying in that song, "If my situation ain't improving, Ima murder everything moving."

That shyt had me like That convo lit a spark in my ass that's there to this day. I was like either I'm gonna be a success, or I'm gonna go on a murder spree, either way I'm making history.

Use your frustration, anger, pain, and every other emotion you got and channel that bytch into making your dreams come true. If not, I hope to see you on a CNN special in a couple years

@Grams @King Poetic @Mr. Pink @DaRealness @PhonZhi appreciate the help