I've decided that I'm finally going to seek professional help. DrX kills his ego aka kill DrX

[DrX]

I know what y'all thinking. "DrX we don't get it breh. We seen your youtube videos. nikka ya handsome as shyt, talented as hell, smart as fukk. Why are u so angry breh?. nikkas want just one of those things" I'm a anomaly of sorts. I don't fit into a box. I'm just a drifter floating in between the butt cheeks of society without a true destination. Sometimes I feel like a moth just flying into random houses trying to find a home but always out of place, never welcomed. I'm a very bitter man, a very unhappy man, a very hatful man, a very jaded man.

Alot of brehs love me, alot hate me and then it changes and the haters begin to love me and the lovers begin to hate me. The problem is y'all expect too much of me. There is no such thing as a universally liked DrX. My opinion is always going to get a 50/50 split.

I have a huge ego as y'all know. I'm a hardcore narcissist and NO its not trolling, I'm not a shock poster YES everything I type are thoughts that flow with my cerebral cortex. I cant lie ... I'm an egomaniac. YES I HAVE A PROBLEM! In order to become "successful" and "make it" big I told myself that I'm the closes human to god and beat that into my head until I fully believed it.

But my ego is out of control to the point where I can't enjoy life anymore and I beat myself down for not being rich, famous and well accomplished by now. I feel like a loser and disappointment to myself. I get angry and take my personal failures out on others because looking into the mirror hurt.

I'm going to see a therapist in the future after I get my resources together via employment. Ego is a drug. Its something that's been killing me.

I've been tracing my life back to my childhood as the only child. My lonely journey through out life. From the crack era eastside of Buffalo to a small apartment on Bryant street. Re tracing what turned me into me. I'm on this journey rebuilding, picking up the pieces of the puzzle and putting them together. Finding the real me and learning to love him again.

I was jerking off last night to some thot getting gangbanged. I think it was one of those RRR joints. The porn was poorly shot and the guys performances were all subpar at best. after I finished into an old sheet of lined note book paper. I crumbled it up and started to think to myself "how did she end up in the position where shes willing to get a train ran on her and have multiple loads shot on face on camera for the world to see?"

was it fate? unfortunate circumstances? greed? or is she a nymph that enjoys it? I dont know but I thought about my own life and why im in the position that im in and not somewhere greater. Like her, we both ended up where were for a reason. My goal is to try to figure this out and get to where I belong...ultimately a southern California beach with a pretty female laying next to me on the sand.

 

[Made Myself A Boss]

Do you run? Getting out and running for an hour has been a great form of therapy in my life.

 

[New Username]

IN

 

[SeveroDrgnfli]

I was jerking off last night to some thot getting gangbanged. I think it was one of those RRR joints. The porn was poorly shot and the guys performances were all subpar at best. after I finished into an old sheet of lined note book paper. I crumbled it up and started to think to myself "how did she end up in the position where shes willing to get a train ran on her and have multiple loads shot on face on camera for the world to see?"

My goal is to try to figure this out and get to where I belong...ultimately a southern California beach with a pretty female laying next to me on the sand.

Dream the dream my guy. NY has snow, Japan is in fukking Asia. Cali has Asians, New Yorkers, and no snow. If you ever want to visit the promised land holler at me. I got a couch you can sleep on for a couple nights. Don't bring any winter clothing because you will not need it.

I'm happy you're focusing on being happy. You deserve it John. You care a lot and managing those feelings seems tough because you grew up as an only child. Having siblings forces one to learn to communicate their emotions.

 

[DrX]

Do you run? Getting out and running for an hour has been a great form of therapy in my life.

naw but i been thinking about jogging...i need to start slow tho....because i might have a heart attack if i go hard...

@Luck made a thread saying he seen ppl die trying to go hard from the start...i always thought about it after reading

 

[Boujee Bonita Braxton]

Damnit! I really want to stick around and watch this unfold.

Let me save this spot just in case.

 

[DrX]

Dream the dream my guy. NY has snow, Japan is in fukking Asia. Cali has Asians, New Yorkers, and no snow. If you ever want to visit the promised land holler at me. I got a couch you can sleep on for a couple nights. Don't bring any winter clothing because you will not need it.

I'm happy you're focusing on being happy. You deserve it John. You care a lot and managing those feelings seems tough because you grew up as an only child. Having siblings forces one to learn to communicate their emotions.

thanks bro....

and I relapsed on the porn...i quit for 5 months...cameback from NYC and starting watching again....then i relapsed again....

 

[SeveroDrgnfli]

naw but i been thinking about jogging...i need to start slow tho....because i might have a heart attack if i go hard...

@Luck made a thread saying he seen ppl die trying to go hard from the start...i always thought about it after reading

Breh get your mind right first. Exercise is more mental than physical, not reaching your goals while working out can be damaging to the psyche. That's why there's a lot of fat, out of shape people in the world who don't want to be. They try to work out, miss their goal, and quit forever. Or they do half ass work outs with no real goals because they're scared to fail.


@Luck your thoughts....

 

[Boolean]

Hov really the GOAT nikka out here saving lives

 

[Meksico]

IN

 

[Michael's Black Son]

Sure.

In.

 

[Hardaway]

fukk DrX

 

[Micky Mikey]

let go and just be

 

[Unknown Poster]

you doing Man?

 

[Mowgli]

I know what y'all thinking. "DrX we don't get it breh. We seen your youtube videos. nikka ya handsome as shyt, talented as hell, smart as fukk. Why are u so angry breh?. nikkas want just one of those things" I'm a anomaly of sorts. I don't fit into a box. I'm just a drifter floating in between the butt cheeks of society without a true destination. Sometimes I feel like a moth just flying into random houses trying to find a home but always out of place, never welcomed. I'm a very bitter man, a very unhappy man, a very hatful man, a very jaded man.

Alot of brehs love me, alot hate me and then it changes and the haters begin to love me and the lovers begin to hate me. The problem is y'all expect too much of me. There is no such thing as a universally liked DrX. My opinion is always going to get a 50/50 split.

I have a huge ego as y'all know. I'm a hardcore narcissist and NO its not trolling, I'm not a shock poster YES everything I type are thoughts that flow with my cerebral cortex. I cant lie ... I'm an egomaniac. YES I HAVE A PROBLEM! In order to become "successful" and "make it" big I told myself that I'm the closes human to god and beat that into my head until I fully believed it.

But my ego is out of control to the point where I can't enjoy life anymore and I beat myself down for not being rich, famous and well accomplished by now. I feel like a loser and disappointment to myself. I get angry and take my personal failures out on others because looking into the mirror hurt.

I'm going to see a therapist in the future after I get my resources together via employment. Ego is a drug. Its something that's been killing me.

I've been tracing my life back to my childhood as the only child. My lonely journey through out life. From the crack era eastside of Buffalo to a small apartment on Bryant street. Re tracing what turned me into me. I'm on this journey rebuilding, picking up the pieces of the puzzle and putting them together. Finding the real me and learning to love him again.

I was jerking off last night to some thot getting gangbanged. I think it was one of those RRR joints. The porn was poorly shot and the guys performances were all subpar at best. after I finished into an old sheet of lined note book paper. I crumbled it up and started to think to myself "how did she end up in the position where shes willing to get a train ran on her and have multiple loads shot on face on camera for the world to see?"

was it fate? unfortunate circumstances? greed? or is she a nymph that enjoys it? I dont know but I thought about my own life and why im in the position that im in and not somewhere greater. Like her, we both ended up where were for a reason. My goal is to try to figure this out and get to where I belong...ultimately a southern California beach with a pretty female laying next to me on the sand.

If you sought out some Brzillian Jiujitsu lessnsz ud probably have less issues with breathing.