Shaquille O'Neal: "Last year you were ranked the fifth most hated person of all time. Kim Jong-un didn't even score that low, and he uses your music to fukkin' torture people."
Hannibal Buress: "Justin, I don't like your music. I think it's bad, man. I hate your music. I hate your music more than Bill Cosby hates my comedy."
Jeffrey Ross: "You are the King Joffrey of Pop."
Chris D'Elia: "Justin Bieber, the man. Why are you here? ... You are about to get f--ked harder than Orlando Bloom f--ked Selena Gomez."
Pete Davidson: "Usher is the one who took you under his wing. You're the worst thing that Usher has done to America, since the guy who sat John Wilkes Booth behind Abraham Lincoln."
Will Ferrell (as Ron Burgundy from 'Anchorman'): "This kid has spunk, moxie, and probably a few other STDs."
Chris D'Elia: "I'm proud of you. You have it all. You literally are a guy who has it all — except for respect, love, friends, good parents, and a Grammy."
Ludacris: "You're not tough, Justin. I'm here to let you know that. I know you've been on Ellen 14 times. You act so much like a p*ssy on the show, Ellen tried to eat you."
Natasha Leggero: "Justin, Selena Gomez had to fukk you. She is literally the least lucky Selena in all of entertainment history."
Martha Stewart: "Justin, you have no idea what you're in for. I'm sure it's great to have 60 million followers on Twitter, but the only place people will be following you in jail is into the shower."
Kevin Hart: "Bieber has 10 million fans—most are in middle schools, or standing at least 500 feet away from one."
Natasha Legerro: "Justin's fan are called Beliebers because it's politically incorrect to use the word retards."
Chris D'Elia: "Those Calvin Klein billboards you made are terrible. And I was in Whitney."
Snoop Dogg: "When you get to the county jail, hear me, you're gonna be the first dude who ever had a girlfriend and a boyfriend named Gomez."
Jeff Ross: "Lately a lot of people have been pointing their fingers at you — and those are just lesbians showing the barber how they want their hair cut."
http://laist.com/2015/03/16/justin_bieber_roast_comedy_central.php
Hannibal Buress: "Justin, I don't like your music. I think it's bad, man. I hate your music. I hate your music more than Bill Cosby hates my comedy."
Jeffrey Ross: "You are the King Joffrey of Pop."
Chris D'Elia: "Justin Bieber, the man. Why are you here? ... You are about to get f--ked harder than Orlando Bloom f--ked Selena Gomez."
Pete Davidson: "Usher is the one who took you under his wing. You're the worst thing that Usher has done to America, since the guy who sat John Wilkes Booth behind Abraham Lincoln."
Will Ferrell (as Ron Burgundy from 'Anchorman'): "This kid has spunk, moxie, and probably a few other STDs."
Chris D'Elia: "I'm proud of you. You have it all. You literally are a guy who has it all — except for respect, love, friends, good parents, and a Grammy."
Ludacris: "You're not tough, Justin. I'm here to let you know that. I know you've been on Ellen 14 times. You act so much like a p*ssy on the show, Ellen tried to eat you."
Natasha Leggero: "Justin, Selena Gomez had to fukk you. She is literally the least lucky Selena in all of entertainment history."
Martha Stewart: "Justin, you have no idea what you're in for. I'm sure it's great to have 60 million followers on Twitter, but the only place people will be following you in jail is into the shower."
Kevin Hart: "Bieber has 10 million fans—most are in middle schools, or standing at least 500 feet away from one."
Natasha Legerro: "Justin's fan are called Beliebers because it's politically incorrect to use the word retards."
Chris D'Elia: "Those Calvin Klein billboards you made are terrible. And I was in Whitney."
Snoop Dogg: "When you get to the county jail, hear me, you're gonna be the first dude who ever had a girlfriend and a boyfriend named Gomez."
Jeff Ross: "Lately a lot of people have been pointing their fingers at you — and those are just lesbians showing the barber how they want their hair cut."
http://laist.com/2015/03/16/justin_bieber_roast_comedy_central.php
cant wait to see it. i love roasts. sometimes i youtube old dean martin roasts.
