You might remember the press conference after Game 7 of the 2010 Finals -- or, as it's known in my house, "The Night That Led To Dad Not Speaking To Anyone For Five Days" -- when Kobe couldn't conceal his delight when someone asked what the title meant to him personally, saying "I got one more than Shaq! You can take that to the bank."
Everyone laughed. Then Kobe added cryptically, "You guys know how I am. … I don't forget anything."
He's not kidding. A few minutes before, when everyone was celebrating in the Lakers locker room, Kobe let everyone know how much he enjoyed passing Shaq in the ring department. He did it loudly. Boisterously. Euphorically. With a few expletives. I've heard this story a few different ways, but in each version, Kobe sounded a little like Tupac lighting everyone up at the end of "Hit 'Em Up." But "everyone" was Shaq. You know, a little revenge for the "Tell Me How My Ass Taste" rap. And that's fine. I love this stuff. It warms my heart to know that, in an era in which the league's best players would rather join forces than beat one another, two of the best 12 players of all time still despise each other.
Quick tangent: Please don't tell me you thought Shaq and Kobe made up, or that you were snookered by their nauseating "We're friends again!" routine at the 2009 All-Star Game. Come on. Do you realize that their feud has its own Wikipedia page? You forget how much happened between these two. They butted heads constantly during the last two title seasons, and when Kobe sold Shaq out during his initial Colorado police interview in 2003, that was the final straw. It's been a one-upmanship game ever since. Occasionally, the hatred seeps out. Like "Tell Me How My Ass Taste." Like Kobe being unable to restrain his glee after getting his fifth ring.
Here's what Kobe forgot, or even better, here's what Kobe knew: Shaq played for Los Angeles for eight seasons. He worked with people who still work for the Lakers now. The odds of Kobe's "Hit 'Em Up" routine getting back to Shaq, in some form, was between 100 percent and 100 percent.
And I don't think Shaq liked it. At all. Remember, Shaq could have gone to Greece or Italy, pocketed crazy money ($8 million to $10 million easy, tax-free), gained as much weight as he wanted, traveled Europe, dunked on a bunch of inferior opponents, become America's most beloved basketball export and expanded his brand to another part of the world. I can't imagine his business manager or agent advising him any differently. Come on, you already won four rings. Eight months abroad. We'll bang this out. You could weigh 375 pounds. It won't matter. They're gonna love you whatever you do. You'll be the biggest basketball star in the history of Europe. Hell, maybe you'll like it there. You could play until you're 45. Let's try it. Nope.
, Pac's soul been walking with Kobe since his death. You can see it from time to time when Kobe snappin, I remember one time the camera caught an angle of him talking shyt and he literally looked exactly like Pac. Of course after Pac died, a month or so later a rookie Kobe starts his first season as a Laker. That must be his guardian angel or sumn...
... started out as simps who just wanted real love
... Ended up fukkin bytches from all over
, catchin cases which lead to:
