My girl threatning to break up with me if I don't propose soon. I'm 21...

[Sandy_Cheeks]

I personally think that getting married at 21 is ok if BOTH parties want to. Now, since OP clearly is not in the mindset to marry anybody, is in school, no job, ect I agree with everyone that said that marrying her would be a mistake.

If you wanted to marry her you wouldnt have made a thread about being pressured into marrying her.

She will one day realize that pressuring a man and giving ultimatims does not get you what you want. And if a man really wants to marry you... he will regardless of his circumstances.

From the age of 18-25 you are going to go through soooo many changes.. no need to fukk that up with added stress and responsibility.


I wish you and Ol girl work out for the best, but put yourself first OP. Love sometimes takes its course and if things dont logically make sense anymore then it may be time to walk away.

Just my 2 cent

 

[Fredrick Thuglas]

You know where your girl got this idea from...smh. nikkas is probably laughin at you now.

 

[Brandeezy]

Get her a ring and just don't give her a date. My uncle and his fiancee have been engaged for like 10+ years lol

 

[DanGleesac]

I been with a girl since 8th grade...now a junior in HS, im 17 and my girl is steady talking and bytching about me getting her some promise ring or she may want to end it...I have no job, tryna focus on school, and me and sooo im like... PEACE HOE!

 

[RickyGQ]

you don't even need to get rid of her... let her break up with you if she has to.
if she asks again, look at her dead in her face and tell her do what you have to do, im not ready.

 

[Turbulent]

you don't even need to get rid of her... let her break up with you if she has to.
if she asks again, look at her dead in her face and tell her do what you have to do, im not ready.

that's another good option but you have to be built for what this bring to the relationship for this day forward. Not everyone is built for this. Once you call a chick's bluff on something and still stays with you, you may have won this one but she WILL be out for revenge. she gave an ultimatum while she was at a vulnerable state (unwise move on her part) and you exposed her which bruises her ego. she ever sees you in a vulnerable state she will test you hard and make you pay because she still holds resentment over this. shyt could take years too. as always it's not necessarily a conscious thing on her part. that's why i say sometimes it's better to break up clean and stay away if you're not ready for all that...

 

[RickyGQ]

that's another good option but you have to be built for what this bring to the relationship for this day forward. Not everyone is built for this. Once you call a chick's bluff on something and still stays with you, you may have won this one but she WILL be out for revenge. she gave an ultimatum while she was at a vulnerable state (unwise move on her part) and you exposed her which bruises her ego. she ever sees you in a vulnerable state she will test you hard and make you pay because she still holds resentment over this. shyt could take years too. as always it's not necessarily a conscious thing on her part. that's why i say sometimes it's better to break up clean and stay away if you're not ready for all that...

Excellent point. That's why you have to ALWAYS be ready for the loss. That's the only way to keep the upper hand. You're right though, not everyone is built for it.

 

[Huellz Santana]

Because I love this girl

Then marry her you fakkit.

cuz imma tell you this, if you really love her and lose her you're gonna feel like shyt. so man up or leave it alone. either way, be a fukking man in your decision making​

 

[KingHelga]

It's always funny to me when the women chime in on these kinds of threads. The answer is always the same...

"Well why don't you just give in I don't see the problem????"

i was not telling him to give in. i actually repeated what a male poster said which was to stall. let's be real, do most guys want to get married on their own or out of pressure from their women and society? an ultimatum is just part of that pressure.

i do not think he should be with her from the response he gave me about wanting to abuse her.

 

[BlvdBrawler]

i was not telling him to give in. i actually repeated what a male poster said which was to stall. let's be real, do most guys want to get married on their own or out of pressure from their women and society? an ultimatum is just part of that pressure.

i do not think he should be with her from the response he gave me about wanting to abuse her.

I would *hope* that the dudes who propose do so because they want to but . Can't speak for them. My bad if I misunderstood.

 

[Reality Check]

We been together since my sophmore year in HS.. we were 16 and she's saying that it's not normal to be in a relationship with someone for 5 years, almost 6 and not have a ring. I looked at her like bytch we're still in college... she graduated from a useless ass 2 year degree at some bum ass community college. I have no job, no money, I live at home with my parents and I'm looking at her like why would you even want to marry me at this point? I might have to end it before she does. I can't believe she hit me with this

But the thing is, I don't even know if I want to marry her. I love her and I want to be with her but I'm 21... I can't say that I'll love her like this in 2,3 or even 5 years. I have days where I want to put hands on her.

IMO people shouldn't start thinking about marriage until their mid to late 20's when they have their shyt together (job with steady income, able to pay the bills, getting drunken #fukkery out of the way).

If you do love this chick, get a place with her first. Should know whether you guys can live together full time for a year or so without driving each other crazy before thinking about a ring.

 

[krexzen]

Word. They think I'm going to school for 3 hours a day and chillin at home. Rinse, repeat. :deadwall:

I hope you at least have some internships during the summer. Having little/no experience on your resume is a bytch, regardless of your degree. You really should try to do something before you graduate. At the very least find an on campus job.

 

[Swiggy]

I'm skipping the additional discussion in this thread to answer OP with...

Look at her like

and tell her no one strong arms you for no damn reason

 

[Da King]

Because I love this girl

you love a girl you been dating for 5 years but won't marry her?


@ all of this

 

[CantStop]

you love a girl you been dating for 5 years but won't marry her?


@ all of this

I'm 21 you idiot. Why would I marry her when I clearly said I have no job and I'm a full time student.