I'm a first-generation West African immigrant. My parents moved in the early 70's and at the time opportunities were quite hard for Africans, racism was rife my dad set up a string of businesses (mom and pop type) but was extremely lucky to invest in real estate in the 1980's where he made his money in inner cities. He invested in quite a few family homes in areas which were rough and had no idea many of those areas will late gentrify. The return has been absolutely ridiculous with homes he bought for thousands in various inner cities in the 80's now being worth millions as those areas have now gentrified and been taken over by hipsters. He has remained humble and low key but has been incredibly successful for a West African immigrant and was able to do most of it by never joining the corporate world as when he moved here those sorts of opportunities weren't open to him.
My parents had 4 kids and have built a network of in the 8 figure range. All of us have done okay (my sister didn't do so well but she's still been supported) and are in our late 20's - mid 30's. My dad is in his 70's. We have a younger brother he is much younger than us who is 22. He was a surprise accident baby.
My youngest brother is 22 and he is quite 'different' (maybe because he is generation Z and grew in social media) that unlike the older few there is much larger age gap also not quite sure why but he didn't assimilate to African or Black culture like we did. We all went to private school but we've all maintained our black heritage and black identity. He is very 'different' in that he doesn't see color, doesn't believe in race. Doesn't care about politic, race or social issues or anything to be with being black or African. He is very generation Z. All he cares about is instagram snap chat etc etc.
Anyway, my dad is getting older and has also has been having the same recurring cancer battle over and over and at this point has decided to bypass chemo. To avoid massive tax issues and also to simplify things he has also decided to do his estate planning and trust management now and here has began the problem.
My brother is currently in a 3 year relationship with a white girl he met at college. They are very serious and it has been a source of ongoing tension. At first we thought it would be a short term relationship but they're serious now and live together.
My dad is pretty much refusing to allocate anything to my brother because he does not believe he is 'entitled' to any inheritance because he is scared my brother is going to marry this white girl.
At first it started out as a joke....my dad still has strong African views but now things have gotten real and he is very seriously not wanting to give him any money because my dad's reasoning is the money will become an asset of my brothers and in turn will be going to his girlfriend and he can't trust my brother not to lose the money in a divorce to a white woman.
The money he is set to lose out on is millions as it is an 8 figure sum being split between us and my mother.
My dad is incredibly bitter about my younger brother and claims he has no cultutre and he just can't trust him not to have his hard earned money end up with a white woman and due to his aging goes into rants about how he has experienced so much racism and so much shyt to earn his millions and his money isn't going to a white woman 'over his dead body' and all this sort of stuff.
He is saying at best he might set up something small for him but essentially if he chooses 'go down this path' he has nothing to give him.
His reasoning is he prefers his millions he has single handedly made despite everything go to the generation benefit of his black kids and grand kids and he will feel bitter my brother loses it in a divorce to a white person.
He is dead serious too and this shyt is now causing world war 3 in my family.
OFC my brother is now raging. The girlfriend is aware because he told her and now it's a mess but my dad isn't budging. He claims he 'doesn't trust him' and 'over his dead body'.
What is your view on all this?
Is my dad out of pocket?!
I believe people can choose what they do with their money but this situation is so blatant that he is leaving my brother out for such a silly reason and I'm fairly certain this whole thing is going to ruin my family.
But he is old and senile and he isn't budging.
Is he in the wrong?
I am one of the estate managers so this is directly affecting my life quite a lot.
I'm tired.
My parents had 4 kids and have built a network of in the 8 figure range. All of us have done okay (my sister didn't do so well but she's still been supported) and are in our late 20's - mid 30's. My dad is in his 70's. We have a younger brother he is much younger than us who is 22. He was a surprise accident baby.
My youngest brother is 22 and he is quite 'different' (maybe because he is generation Z and grew in social media) that unlike the older few there is much larger age gap also not quite sure why but he didn't assimilate to African or Black culture like we did. We all went to private school but we've all maintained our black heritage and black identity. He is very 'different' in that he doesn't see color, doesn't believe in race. Doesn't care about politic, race or social issues or anything to be with being black or African. He is very generation Z. All he cares about is instagram snap chat etc etc.
Anyway, my dad is getting older and has also has been having the same recurring cancer battle over and over and at this point has decided to bypass chemo. To avoid massive tax issues and also to simplify things he has also decided to do his estate planning and trust management now and here has began the problem.
My brother is currently in a 3 year relationship with a white girl he met at college. They are very serious and it has been a source of ongoing tension. At first we thought it would be a short term relationship but they're serious now and live together.
My dad is pretty much refusing to allocate anything to my brother because he does not believe he is 'entitled' to any inheritance because he is scared my brother is going to marry this white girl.
At first it started out as a joke....my dad still has strong African views but now things have gotten real and he is very seriously not wanting to give him any money because my dad's reasoning is the money will become an asset of my brothers and in turn will be going to his girlfriend and he can't trust my brother not to lose the money in a divorce to a white woman.
The money he is set to lose out on is millions as it is an 8 figure sum being split between us and my mother.
My dad is incredibly bitter about my younger brother and claims he has no cultutre and he just can't trust him not to have his hard earned money end up with a white woman and due to his aging goes into rants about how he has experienced so much racism and so much shyt to earn his millions and his money isn't going to a white woman 'over his dead body' and all this sort of stuff.
He is saying at best he might set up something small for him but essentially if he chooses 'go down this path' he has nothing to give him.
His reasoning is he prefers his millions he has single handedly made despite everything go to the generation benefit of his black kids and grand kids and he will feel bitter my brother loses it in a divorce to a white person.
He is dead serious too and this shyt is now causing world war 3 in my family.
OFC my brother is now raging. The girlfriend is aware because he told her and now it's a mess but my dad isn't budging. He claims he 'doesn't trust him' and 'over his dead body'.
What is your view on all this?
Is my dad out of pocket?!
I believe people can choose what they do with their money but this situation is so blatant that he is leaving my brother out for such a silly reason and I'm fairly certain this whole thing is going to ruin my family.
But he is old and senile and he isn't budging.
Is he in the wrong?
I am one of the estate managers so this is directly affecting my life quite a lot.
I'm tired.
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