Nice guys & Nice Girls...does anyone notice the double standard?

[resurrection]

Men would be shut down, by men and women alike, with the quickness if they tried to walk around using terms like "nice guy shaming" or whatever. When your entire group is viewed as "the oppressor", everything you do is seen thru that lens, and vice versa

 

[Larry Lambo]

Why is that? I think you meant to say "men" need to learn how to fend for themselves.

Nah, people need to fend for themselves. I disagree with busted looking chicks being coddled and told that it's men's fault why they don't have a partner.

They are adults. Figure the sh*t out. Or just take the L and say "I'm gonna be fat, and that will limit my dating opportunities, but I love food too much to give a f**k"

 

[WHIPPEDCream]

No I just want people to be real and acknowledge the truth and stop making excuses for their poor decisions and stop trying to deflect or spin when called on it.

Like someone else said, being nice in the grand scheme of things does not mean anything.You can be nice & broke, ugly, swagless,dusty,etc.

If I turned down a nice guy I had a good reason why.

And neither is dark skin black women. Stop crying.

Not crying.There are men who still love my dark ass.

I'm not sure what that has to do with not all nice guys complaining or feeling entitled to sex. Some dudes are just nice and don't get play. They continue to focus on other aspects of life and don't feel any type of way for women that aren't interested in them. They aren't asking for sympathy.

I'm sure it's "nice girls" that are the same way. But a lot of time it's not the nice girl that's the issue, it's her girlfriends thinking that some dude should see her as a charity case and magically be attracted to her unattractive behind because of her personality. Then we get accused of only wanting IG models.

They don't get play because their only good trait is that they are "nice." What else do they have to offer?

 

[MalikX]

You are a f*cking idiot.

Colorism is a system of inequality, just like racism & sexism.Colorism roots from White Supremacy & is just as damaging as racism.Being dark skin has REAL consequences & for all people, however it affects women in a very distinct way.There is research upon research showing how skin color correlates to advantages in our society (f*cking duh).

I'll be sure to have the same "get over it b*tch," mentality when you find your ass the victim of police brutality/murder. I'm sorry b*tch, blame your parents for making you a Black man.

Nobody cares.

Being murdered by police =/= forcing someone to date you

Nobody should be getting discriminated against by law enforcement. Point blank. People have the right to choose whoever they want to have sex with though and if its because of your race, deal with it. You wanna date bad boys, and dudes who are 6"4 but, cry foul because a guy says no dark skin chicks. Stop it. Everybody has preferences, not just you. No matter how much you complain, you still dark skin and the guy still doesn't want you. People don't have to have sex with you. To try to compare that to being murdered by police is just ridiculous

 

[FTBS]

Like someone else said, being nice in the grand scheme of things does not mean anything.You can be nice & broke, ugly, swagless,dusty,etc.

That was actually me . That's all well and good. My only issue was you perpetuating "nice guys are the same as bad boys" fallacy.

 

[Marti]

Classy, and level-headed response to someone you disagree with. You're definitely a "nice guy". I can't imagine why any woman would consider you high-risk and unstable, and someone to avoid.

 

[Marti]

The OP is all over the place...

On one hand you're saying nice guy tactics don't "work" and the nice guys are told it's their fault....

But nice guy tactics do work....just often not on the women the nice guys are going after. Most devout Christian woman and other sheltered types....see what we are calling "nice guy" here as the norm.

It's like being a housecat but expecting to catch and pull down an antelope. That's for lions. Stick to mice.

Then the rest is your run of the mill I don't have much experience with women ranting. A key there is undue focus on appearance or perceived social status. Deal with enough women and you'll realize our world is emotional, connection based and future oriented. All that "her looks/their looks" is the perspective of an outsider looking in.

In short, the assumptions are not only wrong and unfounded....they make little sense.

Not everyone is attracted to everything, not everything is somebody's fault.

Projecting your problems onto the world at large...doesn't solve your problems.

This post only got 2 daps

This is the utter truth

 

[Larry Lambo]

They don't get play because their only good trait is that they are "nice." What else do they have to offer?

Ehh, some "nice guys" have good jobs, are decent to good looking, and may be interesting folks once you get to know them. They may just lack the swag/mouthpiece/status elements of the game. Of course a guy like that can get a girl if he really wants to (i.e. lower his standards), but to get a woman on par with him, he may be losing out to flashier dudes.

The real is, a lot of these chicks are dealing with men above their level, and getting played. But they're ignoring the "nice guys" that are actually on their level lookswise. It's not that these guys have no redeeming qualities. It's that women are falling victim to some higher level dude willing to sell the dream instead of the guy that's actually trying to fulfill her dream.

 

[WHIPPEDCream]

Nobody cares.

Being murdered by police =/= forcing someone to date you

Nobody should be getting discriminated against by law enforcement. Point blank. People have the right to choose whoever they want to have sex with though and if its because your race, deal with it. You wanna date bad boys, and dudes who are 6"4 but, cry foul because a guy says no dark skin chicks. Stop it. No matter how much you complain, you still dark skin and the guy still doesn't want you. People don't have to have sex with you. To try to compare that to being murdered by police is just ridiculous

You clearly lack comprehension skills. >>>

"& STOP MENTIONING BLACK MEN WANT LIGHT SKIN WOMEN WITH LONG HAIR!COLORISM IS MORE THAN ATTRACTING THE OPPOSITE SEX!GET THAT THROUGH YOUR HEAD!SKIN COLOR HAS BEEN SHOWN TO CORRELATE WITH REAL ADVANTAGES IN SOCIETY.BEING DESIRABLE TO A GROUP OF MEN WITH NO REAL POWER IN SOCIETY DOES NOT HOLD A CANDLE TO THE REAL DISADVANTAGES DARK SKIN PEOPLE FACE."

 

[jerniebert]

Nothing wrong with Gym, personal trainers and fat shaming. They are not the same as slut shaming, make up or other examples.

 

[WHIPPEDCream]

That was actually me . That's all well and good. My only issue was you perpetuating "nice guys are the same as bad boys" fallacy.

They are though at least when it comes to the goal. They want to have sex with and be able to attain a beautiful woman.

Ehh, some "nice guys" have good jobs, are decent to good looking, and may be interesting folks once you get to know them. They may just lack the swag/mouthpiece/status elements of the game. Of course a guy like that can get a girl if he really wants to (i.e. lower his standards), but to get a woman on par with him, he may be losing out to flashier dudes.

The real is, a lot of these chicks are dealing with men above their level, and getting played. But they're ignoring the "nice guys" that are actually on their level lookswise. It's not that these guys have no redeeming qualities. It's that women are falling victim to some higher level dude willing to sell the dream instead of the guy that's actually trying to fulfill her dream.

So it all comes down to looks?

 

[Cryptocurrency Scarface]

I was watching a video on youtube titled "On Nice Guys: A brotha's take, pt 3" (there is 3 parts) and he made some interesting observations. In our society "nice" guys are largely criticized for their tactics they attempt to use to try and gain a woman's attention. They are called "entitled", "lames", and whatever else for expecting a woman to be with them because they are so "nice" despite their unattractive qualities. They are told, you can't change women, instead change the world, change men, and most importantly change yourself. They are told that if they are having struggles in the dating world, it is their fault. However if you pay attention to society, women use the same "nice" guy tactics when they aren't as physically attractive, because more so with women they are heavily judged on their physical appearance and sex appeal. Society deep down knows this, and that's why our economy is heavily based on improving a woman's appearance. Gyms, Personal trainers, Clothes, Shoes, Makeup, Plastic surgery all meant to help improve the average woman's sexual market value. It's because of this alone, ANY woman walking around fat, unattractive looking, there's absolutely no excuse, and that woman has issues, but i digress. Anyway the same tactics women and society shame men for, women ironically use it everyday. They are Slut Shaming,Fat shaming, Body Acceptance and specific to the black community we have Colorism. It's really quite funny when you think about it, nice guys are literally fukked with no vaseline by society, women(of all races), simps, manginas, sir lancealots, but nice girls, fat women, dark skinned black women ect are coddled in society. Another interesting thing is while men are told to lower their standards, even the top 20% of men, society tells women to raise their standards, even women who are homely, fat, and unattractive.

So my question is....why is their a double standard?

Serious discussion and answers. So simps like @Matt504 , and @GinaThatAintNoDamnPuppy! stay the fukk out of my thread. Deflections aren't welcomed either. So women who can't add anything intelligent to the conversation stay out of my thread. You know who you are.

I was with you until this

This is coming from a light skinned dude

 

[FTBS]

They are though at least when it comes to the goal. They want to have sex with and be able to attain a beautiful woman.

That's like saying a person applying for a job is the same as the person robbing the place...they have the same goal of getting money. The way you go about doing something and what you plan to do after getting it is pretty noteworthy is it not?

 

[Larry Lambo]

So it all comes down to looks?

Kinda. At least for men. Women obviously factor in other s**t, but even for them it's a fundamental basis of attraction.

Every good looking "nice guy" has an average looking woman trying to give him the draws, and every average looking "nice guy" has a fat/ugly chick trying to give him the draws. He can go the player route and just sleep with those women below his level. But when he chooses not to, and goes after women he's on par with, then he gets the "nice guy" label.

Being nice is all about the man's long term intentions. Both guys want to f**k, but the "nice guy" actually wants to keep her around afterwards.

 

[KnockoutKing]

Nice is a code word for if she thinks your ugly
Unless your rich